VIDEO: A Message to Nurses Everywhere VIDEO: A Message to Nurses Everywhere | allnurses

VIDEO: A Message to Nurses Everywhere

  1. 0 Hello everyone,

    I have had a very challenging start to nursing. Since starting in Nursing in April 2015, I have been through a lot. I have seen great acts of kindness in nursing wherein nursing realizes its potential. I have also witnessed great acts of hatred and ignorance in nursing. I have put together a series of seven videos on my experiences (a heavy, heavy amount of research, and a good amount of emotion, went into these videos) and I wanted to share them all with you. The first one is dark, it's set to Disturbed's "The Sound of Silence", but my message gets more optimistic as you go along. Please watch with an open mind and an open heart.

    Here is the first video, Revelation the First: Truth



    The allnurses.com is tagged in the..tags.

    Thank you for your time and consideration,

    Denise
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  2. 106 Comments

  3. Visit  SnowShoeRN profile page
    #1 20
    My dear colleague. I am so so sorry that you had such an awful experience. I comment to offer support, but to also gentley suggest that you consider asking the mods to remove this post. In it (and in your avatar), you not only give your full real name but also your picture.

    I realize that you are feeling raw and emotional and just generally ruined. But linking these to your true identity may be something you come to regret in your personal and professional life.

    I'm not sure if you post this to just vent or if you're looking for feedback. Please be advised that if it's the latter, you may receive comments that aren't as kind or supportive as you are hoping. Be prepared for support, but also be prepared for doubt, frustration, misinterpretation, and people siding with the other side. People may see this and think you're expecting preferential treatment. They may think you are being overly dramatic. They may think that if you were fired, it must have been for good cause. You won't receive "100%-we-love-you-forever" comments on this forum. Not from everyone. So please brace yourself for that.

    I can see that your experience has hurt you, but it's hard to understand exactly what happened, whether parts of it were warranted, and what you're looking for from All Nurses as a community.

    I'm going to go check out some of your other videos now, but I do caution you about posting on a public forum like this when you are feeling so vulnerable.

    Hang in there. This too shall pass.
  4. Visit  roser13 profile page
    #2 18
    Quote from SnowShoeRN
    My dear colleague. I am so so sorry that you had such an awful experience. I comment to offer support, but to also gentley suggest that you consider asking the mods to remove this post. In it (and in your avatar), you not only give your full real name but also your picture.

    I realize that you are feeling raw and emotional and just generally ruined. But linking these to your true identity may be something you come to regret in your personal and professional life.

    I'm not sure if you post this to just vent or if you're looking for feedback. Please be advised that if it's the latter, you may receive comments that aren't as kind or supportive as you are hoping. Be prepared for support, but also be prepared for doubt, frustration, misinterpretation, and people siding with the other side. People may see this and think you're expecting preferential treatment. They may think you are being overly dramatic. They may think that if you were fired, it must have been for good cause. You won't receive "100%-we-love-you-forever" comments on this forum. Not from everyone. So please brace yourself for that.

    I can see that your experience has hurt you, but it's hard to understand exactly what happened, whether parts of it were warranted, and what you're looking for from All Nurses as a community.

    I'm going to go check out some of your other videos now, but I do caution you about posting on a public forum like this when you are feeling so vulnerable.

    Hang in there. This too shall pass.
    Please take this poster's advice and remove your video/post. The moderators can help with that. Social media has caused abrupt endings to many folks' careers. I didn't watch the entire video so I don't know if you truly want to continue to be a nurse. But if you're considering leaving the profession, it should be on your terms, not an angry employer's.
  5. Visit  SmilingBluEyes profile page
    #3 12
    Agree with the others. I am so sorry for your pain and heartache. They are palpable and so real. I want to cry with you. But have this post removed as your case is still under review and this post won't help it any. I wish you all the best, truly.
  6. Visit  LetLoveNReasonUnite profile page
    #4 1
    My case is not still under review actually. I just did not include that in the video. I understand and see the need for a discipline process.. the problem is when that process is abused. I still have my license and am actually in a temp full time position at the nursing home I still work at. The association was actually very sympathetic with me at the hearing and picked out a few things such as communication and teaching that was lapsing. However, I am told I will never be able to work at the hospital again (or at least for a few years) because I was terminated. I am not doing this to defame the hospital I worked at, the unit manager who fired me, or my profession in general.. I purposefully left out exact details so that it point to the fact that these injustices can happen anywhere under the current system. I know that there are places that work well, where the nurses feel respected and valued, but the problem is that these are the exceptions, not the rule.
  7. Visit  roser13 profile page
    #5 16
    Quote from LetLoveNReasonUnite
    My case is not still under review actually. I just did not want that posted in here. I still have my license and am actually in a temp full time position at the nursing home I still work at. The association was actually very sympathetic with me at the hearing and picked out a few things such as communication and teaching that was lapsing. However, I am told I will never be able to work at the hospital again (or at least for a few years) because I was terminated. I am not doing this to defame the hospital I worked at, the unit manager who fired me, or my profession in general.. I purposefully left out exact details so that it point to the fact that these injustices can happen anywhere under the current system. I know that there are places that work well, where the nurses feel respected and valued, but the problem is that these are the exceptions, not the rule.
    With all due respect, I'm not sure how, with 1.5 year's nursing experience, you feel able to make such a broad statement. Dramatic statements such as that are demonstrating to some of us who might have more years under our belts, that you are expressing sentiments that you may live to regret once you settle into another, more suitable position.

    Again, please take this post down for the sake of your future. The internet is forever.
    Last edit by roser13 on Jan 7
  8. Visit  AliNajaCat profile page
    #6 14
    OK, I'll be the one to state the obvious. Nobody goes eight months doing bad work and receiving no feedback. Communication may well be a problem, but remember that goes both ways-- feedback is gift, and you have to be willing to accept it. Denial is NOT your friend. If your provincial association has documentation from your management and peers, they'll review it for reasonableness. But it's axiomatic that if everybody in your life is doing something wrong, the problem is not usually everybody else, it's you.

    I completely agree that while having made these videos may have been cathartic for you, they clearly haven't been therapeutic in the way it appears you need. The old line about drinking poison and expecting the other guy to die comes to mind.

    Do whatever you can to make them disappear, seek some genuine counseling help with somebody who's seen many people like you and knows how to help you. If you are lucky it won't be too late.
  9. Visit  blondy2061h profile page
    #7 15
    It doesn't matter if your case is done being reviewed. Any future employer can google your name and find this. And anyone who watches this will not be offering you a job.
  10. Visit  pixierose profile page
    #8 12
    First off, huge gigantic (((hugs))) OP.

    Second off, heed these awesome ladies advice.

    I watched the video in its entirety. It's painful to watch you hurt, OP. I'm truly hurting for you. However, this can create even more issues for you down the road for the reasons the previous posters stated.

    What I do think you should do: talk to something in real life. A therapist would be extremely beneficial; I've seen one when times get rough. A neutral soul can be a godsend.

    This is a great community of people. Keep posting. But don't do so under your true name and imagery. None of us here want you to get hurt.

    More (((hugs))).
  11. Visit  LetLoveNReasonUnite profile page
    #9 1
    I have sought out counselling from my compassionate employer, and it has helped. I feel that I have healed, but it still hurts to imagine the hatred and ignorance that exists in this world and masquerades around as some representatives of a caring profession. Not everyone was bad in my previous employer... in fact quite a few were shocked I was let go as they feel I am a good nurse and they reached out to me several times after I was let go. I did make a few mistakes during a time (about a month long period) when the acuity level on the floor went up, but the number of staff did not. At the time the employer did not have any kind of a workload measurement tool, and the nurse manager had her hands full, that much I know. I have no intention of getting another job in nursing and being treated in the same inhumane manner. I understand that not every place is like that... my problem is that some are and that they are supported by a very unhealthy system that promotes injustice (something us nurses are supposed to fight against). No one should be able to act with impunity, and in this case, some people have.

    I was employed there for 8 months in total.. I had one long meeting with my nurse manager a week before I was let go, wherein she used it to go down a long list of the mistakes I made in a one month time frame, as well as some issues that were brought forward (as part of my acclimatization to an acute care floor as a new nurse) during the rest of my employment. I left that meeting crying. I used the next week to compose a thoughtful response to the mistakes specifically so that I would be prepared for the next meeting. She did not give me an opportunity to speak and went immediately into the termination letter. I discussed with the union in the days thereafter and I was not able to fight the termination as I was still on probation, and the nurse manager could pretty much do whatever she wanted, as long as she cited, 'practice issues' (relating to the few med errors I made) in my termination. She was able to act as an autocratic ruler. Things should have been dealt with at the unit level, but instead she handed me off to the Association and I had to suffer for a verdict to come out for 162 days.

    So, in short, I have went through the following:
    Lost job
    Lost the benefits
    Lost countless nights' sleep and cried myself to sleep several times
    Had to wait 162 days for a final verdict from the disciplinary committee
    Had to take 2 weeks off sick leave when I was first accused of 'misconduct' and 'incompetence' (and was in counselling at this time)
    Had my full name and verdict published on the Association's website
    Had my full name and verdict published in the local newspaper (3rd paper of the main section)
    Had my full name and verdict announced on three different radio stations in my city
    Have to pay the Association $1500 in processing fee.

    I would not be publishing this here if I did not feel like a huge injustice has occurred, and that I feel that there are probably other instances of this worldwide. This breaks my heart.
  12. Visit  SnowShoeRN profile page
    Quote from LetLoveNReasonUnite
    I am not doing this to defame the hospital I worked at, the unit manager who fired me, or my profession in general...
    Be that as it may, it doesn't necessarily come across that way. And how is your previous hospital or unit manager, as well as any possible future hiring managers, supposed to know your intentions?

    You could be up for hire somewhere else and someone could find these videos and draw all sorts of conclusions (whether erroneous or not) about what happened and your reaction to it. Without knowing the full story, would you want to hire someone who made 7 emotional youtube videos and posted them on a public nursing forum after encountering professional hardship?

    I understand that you are angry and hurt and want to bring light to an issue that you feel is close to you, but I don't think this is the best way to do it. You are clearly very emotional in the videos. Frankly, as someone in one of the youtube comments said, I think this just draws more attention to you and doesn't demonstrate any self-reflection or moving on. If making the videos is carthartic for you, then perhaps re-do them so we don't see your name or face. I certainly wouldn't link them to your true identity. Very unwise from a professional standpoint.

    I'm glad your other job could put you in touch with a counselor. Please talk to he or she about their opinion of your public videos.
  13. Visit  LetLoveNReasonUnite profile page
    #11 2
    One of the issues that I have.. is that I feel if I do not speak up, this same kind of injustice will happen again and again and again, leading to much more heartache, not necessarily for me but for many others.
  14. Visit  roser13 profile page
    Quote from LetLoveNReasonUnite
    One of the issues that I have.. is that I feel if I do not speak up, this same kind of injustice will happen again and again and again, leading to much more heartache, not necessarily for me but for many others.

    Ok, the gloves come off.

    As of this posting, you continue to sacrifice yourself, your reputation and your future. I don't know how many folks need to tell you this before you act. Don't be a melodramatic martyr (which is how you are presenting). You cannot singlehandedly change the culture of nursing to what you wish it to be. And again, you are a very new nurse. You must understand that you absolutely do not have the experience or wherewithal to judge an entire profession.

    I cannot emphasize enough that you are young, with minimal experience. You need to realize that you are coming across to long-term, experienced nurses as condescending (at a minimum) with your desire to single-handedly "save" the field of nursing. Nursing has long existed without your help and no doubt will continue to survive.

    I continue to urge you to save yourself and take this down while you still can. I'm done making an effort because you are not exactly listening.
    Last edit by roser13 on Jan 7

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