Verbal, Written warnings and Termination - page 14
by madwife2002 73,304 Views | 162 Comments Senior Moderator
i know a lot of health care employees are worried or concerned they may be on the ladder from verbal warning to written warnings and then fired. for many this is not an unrealistic fear it is something which is affecting their... Read More
- 2Nov 20, '10 by wondernMy Goodness!This sounds just like the 'magnet' medical center I worked for for close to 20 years. I should've never transferred to that clinic from the hospital. I should've transferred out, like my manager suggested after multiple uncalled for write ups, or resigned and come back within 90 days elsewhere if possible so as not to lose all my seniority, benefits, etc. Not that it really mattered much to me anymore with the constant write ups for supposed 'rude and unprofessional' behavior.
MomRN123, I am just now seeing your posts. How long has it been since you've worked? Sorry for your suffering because that's what it was. I'm glad we're both free from that hostility. I see the first on this thread is from a few weeks ago. I missed it until now or I would've responded quicker. You explained that whole 'gang up' phenomena so clearly. Thank you. I think it takes a lot of bravery to come on here and expose how you were bullied. It is one of the hardest things for an excellent and conscientious nurse to hear herself being labeled as "rude and unprofessional." These bullies take advantage of using this write-up along with their enabling managers, nurse and non-nurse alike, and in coordination. I just wasn't able to put it all in words as clearly as you did. I get so angry just thinking about it all. I let it affect my whole life by not just leaving the hostile work environment. What's really ridiculous is it's been 5 years since my termination. I don't want to play those games anymore. I haven't gone back to nursing. I wish I could sue the blankety blank out of them for defamation and loss of wages. However, I am in a will to work state which protects the employer more than the employee as far as I can tell. That's why I wonder how a union may have helped and stopped this 'gang up' phenomena from happening in a supposed professional workplace where you really need to concentrate on providing patient care not survival day to day! Why couldn't administration just 'get it'! The patients end up suffering in the long run. Who wants a nurse who hasn't slept all night worrying about being labeled and written up as "rude and unprofessional", or about being cussed out at work that day, or told by their manager in a sarcastic manner to double up on their anti-depressant they only started for the first time ever in their life to deal with the grief given by their manager? That's what she said,"...maybe you should take two..." Shouldn't that be against the law? That's what I thought. Silly me. She can live with those kinds of morals but that's not how we nurses roll. We have compassion and respect for where we all came from as nurses, and more importantly as human beings.
Sorry, I got going on my own very old mess again. Sorry you went through the same sort of thing it sounds like. You work too hard to earn the privelege to work as a nurse to let someone who doesn't understand that a chance to blow it. It should be illegal. It's not worth your health or your family seeing you hurt. When you hurt, the ones that love you hurt, too. God love my Momma, she listened so much as did my hubby and kids, too. Why did I keep getting written up? Oh yes, I finally went out of the chain because the chain was doing nothing to stop the bullying. My asst. managers were nurses but their mangers were not. I went to all of them.
When the whole situation really worsened was when my new and last asst. manager, new masters trained from a bridge program where you didn't need previous nursing, just a BSN in something, told the ancillary staff in a meeting where we were all in attendance that they didn't need to report to me before leaving the floor when I was in charge. Hmmm...I went above her. I had too. I had no help or knew where anyone was?! It was finally retracted, very nonchalantly, like oh, you do need to tell someone when you leave. It was really a moot point by then. It was like a non-stop smoke break for some after that. I then got written up for saying something to the tech about that, too. The internet was their favorite pastime. When I mentioned it to her, she came over and shopped for online with the other nurse and techs while I worked. I guess maybe I should've just stopped and shopped if I wanted to fit in. What a backstabber she was! I would've loved to help the new asst. manager but she made it very clear she didn't need my help she already had her buds, the same as her predecessors! I thought she was my last hope there.
This board has been very therapeutic. You can vent and vent and vent, and once in a while you actually get a pat on the back and another nurse will say, hey, I can tell, and I'm telling you now, you are not rude and unprofessional, you are a nurse, a nice nurse that was being bullied by a bunch of ole billygoats! Heehee, that sounded like my dear ole Nanny! :redpinkhe She knew way better. It was always her dream to 'make a nurse'. I think she was, really, just before licensing. Maybe I should just go find some volunteer work with no strings to warm back in to it. Then again, maybe, I've had enough. I've had so many rewarding experiences as well. Nursing is an art you keep in your heart. No one can take it from you.
I'm just kind of resting for now. They didn't take it from me. Nursing is hard enough work without bullying abuse! I just have to put a name to it. Thanks for the support in your speaking up, too, MomRN123! Just knowing you're not alone is comforting. You rock!!!
- 3Nov 21, '10 by lamazeteacherIt's so sad to see posts by nurses who endured insults and abuse for as long as 20 years!
We need to support each other by finding a positive outlet for our pent up emotions. When I worked at a hospital many years ago as an Inservice Coordinator, I started having monthly sessions with each unit's nurses on all shifts, with an objective that I needed to know their needs for education, in order to provide pertinent programs. What I found, was the need nurses have for tools to deal with angry coworkers.
This happened in San Francisco, and George Bach just wrote "Constructive Aggression" then; and gave a workshop at UC in Berkeley called "Fair Fighting", complete with soft bats with which you could hit someone without physically hurting them, as if they were the person who had been scrambling your self esteem. I brought some of those techniques back to work (although the soft bats were a recommendation rather than an actual activity). Eric Berne had also just come up with his "Transactional Analysis" work, and I used his descriptions of the 3 facets of personality which can result in miscommunication, and other theories he described, to assist nurses and supervisors in keeping their working relationships at an "adult" level.
That was quite effective, and nurses told me they employed the information and techniques at home, to get away from ineffective ways of dealing with problems there. I've described many of the methods in other posts, and still believe that short of psychotherapy, that yields positive results and keeps people from erupting inappropriately. The behavior described in the posts here, indicates that changes in behavior can occur from employing "straight" interactions instead of "crooked" ones and allows psychic control over one's own behavior, with the result that others want to utilize it too. Of course anything will work well when ethical and not malevolent intentions exist. Without that it is a lot harder to relate positively to those who are stuck in childish thought and actions; and it will work then, too if the techniques are done consistently.
Good luck with your efforts in calming disturbed waters.....
- 1Nov 23, '10 by windjmmrsomething that i ve often thought about i wonder how many of our "bosses" including all ancillary personel check the board sites on the internet to see what they re employees are saying about them...we all konw it s our first right admendment but i often think that they find a way to twist it into something....watch your backs when you post and whatever you do DO NOT go to plalce of employment on a web site and log on to the site.. once they have basic Id they can look around the internet to see what is being said..
- 0Dec 1, '10 by sunrockHope this fits in, i was oriented by one staff member that boldly told me that she does not have the time. Another that told me to take the narcs., carry on the cart etc. etc., so no back and forth. Well you know what happened, rushing, forget to replace in count, written up, meds. late to floor etc. , cannot write all the details, written up, and doc. not on file written up, transcrip. error, FIRED, left in good faith, had a job before leaving premises, back to what i love caring for pts., no stress, weekends off, 3 days salary = 2 weeks there, destressing, 4 days to clean, sleep , but concerned when all other employees are awaiting their last write up and then thru the door, while still working them like dogs.
- 2Dec 3, '10 by windjmmrSunrock...sooo sorry you had that bad experiance.... i know what that feels like,,, having 33 years in this and lord knows how many I ve orientated... I used to work with someone who absolutely refused to orientate anyone new to the floor and i ll never forget the night i had to orientate a new staff nurse and was sick with a cold that was raging into a fever...but you know what that new employee always remembers that...that i stuck it out for her and to this day she always comes back to me with any questions she has..but i also agree with the dumb assed stuff about write ups.... in the last 3 monts get this... an uppper respiratory infection...then wound up in the hospital with chest pain and it turned out that i pulled some serious chest muscles while we were not staffed right for the workload( funny how they can staff for numbers or acuity when it suits the budget ) prior to that they asked us to take time off and help them out so many of us did that and then they cut our hours for 2 weeks when they were slammed with a few resignations then they restored our hours and we didn t have enuf supplies to do out job... then i go into work with a major cold worked 2 days and the second day i had a raging fever ... i had to finish the 2nd med pass and finally got to go home well needless to say i m home today still with a fever and a md bill...BUT when i go onto work tomorrow i will guarentee i will be hit up with a write up for "excessive" abscenceso it s no wonder wht we leave our jobs...go figure....
- 2Dec 3, '10 by jelptexQuote from mendoza70Interesting post.I took a job at St Joseph's In Bellingham WAshington on MCU under *****..
I and been away from the bedside for three years and had been working in the clinic setting . I have been a nurse since 1976 and know alot.
I was two weeks into my orinetation when I was told I was"not a good fit"
In my time there I was approached by one nurse who told me to "watch out" Another nurse told me that the President was a terrorist and made racial statements. The person I was orienting under was a good technician but not a good nurse. She was dictatorial and task orientented.
SO I say to you if You want to take a job on MCU in Bellingham WAashington, "watch out"
I, too, have been told I was "not a good fit."
Can anyone define ??
And WHY, (please WHY) would anyone want to be a ("nurse") notwithstanding my 33 years in this "profession". ?
Need I "roll over","sit", "fetch".
Oh yeah, it's YOUR,Mother, Father...(fill in the blank...) and YOU treat me like CRAP....!!
YOU'RE RIGHT !! It's not a good fit. My life, my sanity, my heart....
But then, I'm TOO OLD for the Peace Corps.
Would that I could...eyedrops in Africa..soap & water in Namibia...condoms in South Africa.
I've wasted my life/energy for thankless/privaledged brats...and yes, I'm a "baby-boomer".
Only wish I could start over. But, then, don't we all?
- 2Dec 15, '10 by MCTRN07I agree 100% with all. I just left a job like that. It was pick at this, pick at that, nothing was right...Some ppl missed multiple days, I missed one day the whole yr and was told attendance could be better..I mean WTH? If they are after you like that I agree on the "Get Out" part. It will just make you miserable and before you know it you are taking it home to the family...GET OUT FOR YOUR HEALTH! Find something better.