Things You'd Like To Tell Visitors . . . . and get away with it

If you don't know what the numbers mean on the cardiac monitor don't touch the "touch screen" to find out what it does.

No you can not have a meal try for yourself 5 minutes after you get here and your "loved" hasn't even been examined yet for their shortness of breath!

c0ntagion wrote, "Can I give both your father and you some Ativan? 1 mg for the patient, 1 mg for the family!"

How much for the nurse, c0ntagion? I vote for 2 mg, then titrate to effect.

And I "advocate" for the ultimate nursing dream, aerosol sprays of ativan in the patient/public areas of the hospital....and a valium salt lick in the ER.

I "borrowed" it from someone at another forum.

Why do you keeping waiting until the nurse leaves the room to ask me questions about your relative that I am not qualified to answer? Aren't you tired of hearing me tell you that I am unable to discuss this with you, and that the nurse is?


The answer is NO. The answer was NO, 5, 10 and 15 minutes ago when you asked me, and the answer will still be NO 5, 10 and 15 minutes later when you continue to ask. As a matter of fact, you knew the answer was no, before you even came up to me. Don't think for a second that because I'm new, I can be taken advantage of. So continue to ask me that question. I'll just continue to tell you that, as per policy, the answer is no.

Do not ring the bell 5 minutes after I told you I would have to check with the doctor to see if you can have something for pain. First I have to find him, then wait until he's free (after all, in an ER they do tend to have more than one patient!). Then describe it. Then go get it from the med pyxis. Sending 3 more staff members after me to tell me you need a pain med only makes it go slower!

Do not tell me your call bell has been going off for half an hour. You are right next to the desk, we would have noticed. Besides which the call system rings an annoying door bell sound non stop which cannot be turned off from the desk. No, it has not been half an hour. If you exaggerate that, I expect you will also exaggerate and dramatize what ever it is you are complaining about!

Yes, I know the doctor said you could take your kid home now. That didn't mean get him dressed, I still have to get the discharge vitals done, including the rectal temp., and take out the IV. And he didn't put the chart up for discharge 2 seconds after he told you that, he kept it for 20 minutes while he wrote you up as well as a few other charts. Then I had to get free long enough to type your discharge instructions, send to the pharmacy for your first dose you insisted on getting here, and teach you how to give it. Why didn't you just take your kid to an urgent care if you didn't want to hang around in an ER?

Why does that matter?

"Get a job!" -or- "Find a hobby!"