The math doesn't add up

Nurses General Nursing

Published

I'm a math person, so it really bothers me when my manager asks us to do an additional task or duty without subtracting a current task or duty. The math doesn't add up.

Our current duties take up a full shift. If you add something more, something else needs to be eliminated.

For example:

When my manager says, "I'd like you to provide the patient with handwritten thank you cards. These cards will take about 2 minutes to write and distribute per patient." She should also say, "therefore, you no longer have to complete care plans for your patients, as those take about the same amount of time. From now on, I will write the care plans for you."

I'm a math person, so it really bothers me when my manager asks us to do an additional task or duty without subtracting a current task or duty. The math doesn't add up.

Our current duties take up a full shift. If you add something more, something else needs to be eliminated.

For example:

When my manager says, "I'd like you to provide the patient with handwritten thank you cards. These cards will take about 2 minutes to write and distribute per patient." She should also say, "therefore, you no longer have to complete care plans for your patients, as those take about the same amount of time. From now on, I will write the care plans for you."

While other posters address the thank you cards in your example (said cards should be renamed the letmekissyourbuttocksonemoretimebeforeyoufilloutyourcustomersatisfactionsurvey, btw), let's look at the math, you math person you! Math has nothing to do with nursing in a 12 or 8 hr shift. Jane Doe needs 14 minutes to waste your time on Mon, on Tues, she needs 22. A new duty of stocking towels needs 3 minutes per pt IF you have the time at all/remember and give a crap enough to actually do that. Point is, there's too many variables for the math to EVER add up.

You're real point, I think, is that we're too busy putting out fires to satisfy the demands put on us by ppl in management who don't currently/haven't ever done our job (and if so, I agree!). In the nameofStudorweprayamen.

Specializes in Family Medicine.
this will be one of the corners I cut!

Me too! I have yet to write out one of these thank you cards. I like to say out loud, "nurse refused," whenever I'm asked to do things like this. Makes me feel like a BA. No gracias, I'm not thanking patients via thank you cards. Not genuine, don't have the time, etc.

Lov'in these replies. Bunch of geniuses on AN.

Specializes in Family Medicine.
While other posters address the thank you cards in your example (said cards should be renamed the letmekissyourbuttocksonemoretimebeforeyoufilloutyourcustomersatisfactionsurvey, btw), let's look at the math, you math person you! Math has nothing to do with nursing in a 12 or 8 hr shift. Jane Doe needs 14 minutes to waste your time on Mon, on Tues, she needs 22. A new duty of stocking towels needs 3 minutes per pt IF you have the time at all/remember and give a crap enough to actually do that. Point is, there's too many variables for the math to EVER add up.

You're real point, I think, is that we're too busy putting out fires to satisfy the demands put on us by ppl in management who don't currently/haven't ever done our job (and if so, I agree!). In the nameofStudorweprayamen.

Excellent points MoopleRN. Me gusta. :up:

Hmmm, a personal "thank you" note from the nurse at discharge? The way I used to write "Thanks!" and drew a smiley face on the bill, topped with a few mints, the way I did eons ago when working as a waitress? What exactly are we looking for in terms of a reaction from the patient, a tip?:uhoh3:

Yes, I'm sorry, but this is strange. Now if the hospital wants to send home a brochure that says, "Thank you for using THUS AND SUCH HEALTH SYSTEM, that's great. What does that have to do with nurses sending out thank you notes to their patients? Are physicians and social workers doing this?

I think this has reached the point of ridiculousness.

Aaaaaaand that little "must do" would effectively spell the end of CheesePotato's nursing career. Really. Because my mind immediately went to the following chestnut:

"Dear Gentleman of 513B--

That we stand here on the cusp of your release from the hospital to long term intensive care, I would like to take this time to reflect on our time together and offer heartfelt thanks.

Thank you so much for not only drinking and driving but going that extra mile for excellence and bringing it all home with a well placed, "LOL U no it buddyz" text that effectively helped you flip your car across a four lane expressway. I mean, I really didn't need sleep anyway, so getting called out at two AM to flood you with blood products, realign your pelvis, both femurs, your tibia, ulna, place a couple chest tubes and rex open a bit of your skull was exactly what I needed. Let us not forget the vomit and blood on my shoes and scrubs to the point it saturated my undergarments. I had been meaning to swap them out anyway.

Oh, and those other two that suffered from your awesomeness? Yeah, that just made my night way fantastic.

Ah yes, memories.

Thank you. Truly. Thank you.

Love and snuggles,

~~CP~~"

Can you say terminated?

For the life of me, I will never understand management. Last year they wanted us to start verbally thanking patients for "allowing us to participate in their care". Really? You flipped your ATV while high as a kite. This is not really a highlight in my world right now, thank you.

But, may I suggest writing out a few quick fill form letters and having them placed on rubber stamps? Think of the time you will save while meeting your quota of thank you letters!

Cheers,

~~CP~~

P.S.

A certain Lemur mentioned something about a Thank You note meme and after I got done coughing my gum back up out of my lung, I decided that was a splendid idea. Give me a day to get it all ironed out, but it will be a sister blog to my current one *see my profile for details. All credit goes to Lemur for something that is pure hilarity and genius. ::salutes::

:roflmao:

Welcome to healthcare. The only way to escape that nonsense is to leave patient care. Innovation in nursing is usually the creation of more needless work or another useless form.

Thank you notes to patients from nurses is innovative? Wow. As I said, let the hospital send it with their brochure.

As a patient, I'd prefer excellent care and the personal interaction that comes with a genuine "Best to you and fare-thee-well" or a genuinely caring follow-up call.

You can take certain things a bit far. Is this reallly something for which we should kill more trees?

IDK. Sounds like a SNL skit. Pt in wheelchair at hospital door and nurse across from pt. The exchange goes like this. Pt: "Thank you." Nurse: "No. Thank you." Pt: "No. Thank You..." ad infinitum...

Specializes in PICU, NICU, L&D, Public Health, Hospice.

The thank you notes/cards need to come from the hospital administration, not the bedside nurses, IMHO.

Can't we just be like flight attendants instead, stand at the front door, "Buh-bye. Buh-bye. Buh-bye. Buh-bye..."

Specializes in Adult/Ped Emergency and Trauma.

...do we get to hand out Chocolate Mints with the Hospital Logo too?:)

@wooh, at least they got people too stop calling them "stewardess!" Maybe there's a shot we can go from "Hey you," "you there," and "excuse me- Com' mere" to just "nurse," lol!

The idea of nurses taking the time to write thank you notes is both infuriating and hilarious. How about your welcome notes?

The unit clerks on our unit write sympathy cards to the families of our patients that die. We average 45 deaths/month, so I bet that can get time consuming, I wouldn't be surprised if that task were to fall on nursing staff soon, too.

I don't see the big deal. How long does it take to sign a card? 5 seconds? You have five patients per day and adding 25 seconds to your daily "math" is going to break the camel's back? It is OK to refuse to sign it on principle (like, thanking them for what exactly, they should be thanking me!) but complaining because it adds to your work load seems unreasonable to me. And seriously fellow nurses, patients do have choices when choosing a hospital and while we complain about patients it is only because of them that we have a paycheck. No patients = no jobs.

Specializes in FNP, ONP.

Well then how about refusing just on principle because it is colossally stupid? I agree, the patients should be thanking the nurses, not the other way around. It's preposterous. If the hospital wants to send thank you notes, they should come from the administration. I wouldn't do it either, or, I'd sign silly fake names.

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