Shaken Baby - page 2

I am a senior in a BSN program and the last couple of days make me wonder if I can in fact be a nurse. In my clinical I took care of a newborn baby that was suspected to have been shaken to the point... Read More

  1. by   BSNtobe2009
    I know that during the 50's and 60's, they used to have mandatory sterilization of women that were sentenced to prison terms, those that were mentally retarded, etc. I thought it was the most barbaric practice that I had ever heard of.

    However, I just wonder....in cases like this....how much sympathy would I have for a mother who did that to a child if this was something that could be legalized today? Not much.

    Drug addicted babies, those mothers need to be sterilized.

    Mothers that keep getting their kids taken away by the foster care system that are CLEARLY not cleaning up their act....they need to be sterilized.

    A society is judged by how we treat our most vulnerable. I just have no sympathy at all for people that are so horribly cruel to a child.
  2. by   HeartsOpenWide
    There is nothing you could have done. The baby should have never been released to the parents, but that is the system for you.:trout:
  3. by   Jo Dirt
    I couldn't be civil to parents whose baby was brought in for that.
  4. by   Freedom42
    Quote from BSNtobe2009
    You didn't screw up sweetie....the social worker did by sending that child back.
    I doubt social workers like being stereotyped any more than nurses do. How do you know the social worker wasn't overruled by a judge? How do you know one parent didn't lie to police about what the other did? How do you know that there aren't other suspects?

    What happened is a tragedy for all concerned. Don't not make it worse with needless speculation.
  5. by   justavolunteer
    Please don't feel bad about the fact that you couldn't do much about an abused child as a nursing student. I am 'justavolunteer', but I've had the occasion to see abused children before because I volunteer on a pt unit. I never knew the outcome after they left. I just remember that it wasn't something I could just see & forget about. After I saw one child who had new bruises, old bruises & various in-between bruises, I didn't sleep well for a few nights.
    I hope you continue on your quest to be a nurse. Look at it this way too: if you ever QUIT caring, that's the real time to worry.
  6. by   allantiques4me
    What a horrible situation you encountered!Dont give up your dream to work with children.I happen to work with children that have been severely abused and have behavioral issues because of it.i can say i truly feel I can make a difference in thier lives ,I bet you could too.Hang in there and try to find coping mechinisms to help you feel better when encountering such horrorible things people sometimes do to children
  7. by   kate1114
    Quote from royr
    Should I give up my dream of working with children because I will never be able to help them be well and safe? My heart aches and all I can do is hug my own little daughter. My school has no berievment program or services available and I feel like - I think everyone has the idea how bad.
    Please, don't give up your dream. It is so very sad to see children like this, but they do exist, and leaving nursing or avoiding pediatrics won't make the situation go away. I cared for a shaken baby once who was just devestating. No one who cared for that child was untouched. We were angered over the needless abuse of this 4 month old who was beautiful and had no other health problems, unlike many other children in our PICU.

    I'm sad that your school doesn't have any sort of bereavement program, but surely there's a counselor or something? This is hard to work through on your own. The nurses on that unit may have an informal bereavement process and employers usually have an assistance program of sorts. In other words, you are seldom all on your own to deal with these sorts of things.

    Good luck to you. Your caring attitude tells me that you are a great fit for pediatrics. Sometimes, unfortunately, children fall through the cracks. But knowing that you did all you could do really helps in a situation like this. There is nothing else that you could have done.
  8. by   traumaRUs
    I am so very sorry for you - this is a tragedy. There is nothing you could have done to prevent it. However, if you continue to have difficulty with this situation, please share your feelings with a counselor or a trusted instructor.
  9. by   Antikigirl
    Most of the best people in healthcare I know have done the right thing and had other systems in play lead to heartbreak...but those folks seek some counseling if needed, get back on that horse with greater knowledge and an even bigger passion to change things for the better...sounds like that very well could be you!!!!!!

    Maybe by whatever fates that be...this lesson so early was actually part of what you will become! (I think of that daily now). The heart and spirit are powerful things..and using them as motivation to help illicit change instead of sorrow or anger is something wonderful!

    Don't give up...let yourself greive thought..but don't give up! This was most certainly NOT your fault..and I mean what could you do...go to jail by not letting the parents have their child back? What about the mother? She should be equally responsible in my book for even allowing her child to be in harms way (I mean hello...hospital once for about killing the child! That would have me running with my child for the hills!). What about CSD or AFS??? Did they drop the ball and allow for this?

    NOT your fault! But learn from this, learn about points of the system that need help, and be aware of them for the future (working with kids you have more than just shaken baby I am afraid...heck, I worked with geri's and you wouldn't believe the amount of different abuses people get away with with them!!! About killed my own heart till I strove, and still do, to do something about it...many a police and AFS was called by me!).
  10. by   scribblerpnp
    YOU did everything right, CPS did not/ the legal system did not.

    Once the pediatrician I worked with was called on to testify against the parents about a child abuse case. SHE did everything right as well, but the judge ruled in favor of the parents (apparently they could have one more chance not to beat their child to a bloody pulp.) Not two months later the kid is brought to the ED DOA from being beated by the parents. :angryfire

    The pediatrician sent a copy of the death certificate to the judge.

    Screw HIPPA in that case.
  11. by   BSNtobe2009
    Quote from scribblerrn
    The pediatrician sent a copy of the death certificate to the judge.

    Screw HIPPA in that case.
    :yeahthat: :redlight: :redlight: :bowingpur
  12. by   BSNtobe2009
    Quote from Freedom42
    I doubt social workers like being stereotyped any more than nurses do. How do you know the social worker wasn't overruled by a judge? How do you know one parent didn't lie to police about what the other did? How do you know that there aren't other suspects?

    What happened is a tragedy for all concerned. Don't not make it worse with needless speculation.

    It is very, very ridiculously rare for a judge to not go with a social worker's recommendation when an infant is in a present state of injury from shaken baby syndrome. There is usually substantial evidence presented to the judge that NO ABUSE AT ALL had taken place before a baby is readily returned to the parents. I seriously doubt that happened in this case.

    It doesn't matter if the parents lied to the police about what the other did, that isn't a determination for the social worker to make. Parents lying to the police to cover up the other is hugely common. If both parents had access to the child, children are usually removed until a full investigation can take place, and I guarantee you with the backlog of social workers, that didn't take place during the hospital stay of that baby....they take several weeks to complete.

    The last people to be with the child is always at the top of the suspect list.

    Usually someone at the hospital is called to court in these cases because you can't cross-examine a medical report, so if there was a formal court hearing, the OP probaby would have at least heard about it...but I also will take into consideration and respect the fact that the OP may have chosen to leave that fact out due to privacy reasons, as you never know who is reading the board.

    I didn't stereotype any social workers, I gave a single true scenerio.

    Sweetie, please try to remember this is a message board...we are all entitled to our opinion...and it's very rude to bash someone else for having one. The OP's cannot always give all facts to a case due to privacy reasons, and if we waited for every detail the board would come to a standstill and turn into a major research project for every post.
  13. by   imenid37
    Please see if you can get some help through the hospital's EAP program or a referral from a college counselor or college health centre to a grief counselor. You did nothing wrong. The laws on the books often fail to protect children and instead treat them like possessions. The legal and social service systems must work so hard to uphold parents rights that they ignore the child's rights as a human being. It is very demoralizing. You and the other nurses working with you did not make a decision to beat this child to death. The father did.

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