RN made me cry today at work!!

jacob1 · Oct 11, 2005

She was definitely out of line. Sorry you had to go through that.

Thank you :)

FroggysMom · Oct 11, 2005

SHE WAS OUT OF LINE!!! I would NEVER tolerate one of my staff members talking to another this way. She would have a written documented warning on her file in a HEARTBEAT. There are three of us in charge of my unit, the nurse manager, the daytime coordinator and the evening coordinator (me.) Each of us has one thing that really makes her go off and this is one of mine. I will NOT tolerate belittling or harrassment. You don't have to like everyone on the floor but you WILL treat them with the same dignity and compassion that you want to be treated. I don't take it from my husband and I don't take it from the doctors. I am the nicest person you ever want to meet, until I feel that someone is being taken advantage of or is being treated unfairly. Then I am a bulldog. I don't care if someone is an RN, LPN or HCA you need to figure out a way to speak like a professional or you need to move on. Being Bipolar or Stressed is no excuse. I am stressed almost every day, with 8-9 admissions, plus labs and test results, plus evaluations and meetings. What if I used that as an excuse to come down on the RN's? Nope, wouldn't fly would it? They need to do something about her before she runs off all the staff and then what?

I agree. Rude is rude.

rn/writer, RN · Oct 11, 2005

Couple of things.

Having read through most of the posts, it appears your screen name is confusing people. Even after you explained that you were a female using your son's name, people were still assuming that you were male. One poster seemed to attribute some of the difficulty you were having to a male's inability to take criticism from females. To avoid further confusion, I would suggest signing your first name (if it is not gender-ambiguous like Pat) at the end of your posts.

Second, you're probably going to have better results if you screen out possibly erroneous or misleading info about someone's mental diagnosis and focus strictly on behavior. It doesn't matter if this nurse is bipolar. In fact, referring to that can be seen as dsicriminatory. Fortunately, that information is unnecessary. The behavior you mentioned is wrong no matter who is doing it and no matter what their mental health status is. The last thing you want is to get into a tug of war over whether or not the nurse has mental health issues. That isn't where the attention belongs. Speak only about what she did, how you responded, and what you want to be different. The rest is for those in authority to pursue.

The more reasonable you look, the more off the charts her behavior will appear.

Good luck to you.

cardiacRN2006, ADN, RN · Oct 11, 2005

Look, people will treat you the way you allow them to treat you, so they only get one shot to be rude. If she were rambling on an on to me like that I would have simply told her to chill out. It's amazing how much power people have over you when you allow it, and little their words seem when you don't. Blow her off, act as if her opinion doesn't matter (it dosen't). Besides, surgeons will treat you the same way right in front of their pts--so get used to the sting now.

jacob1 · Oct 11, 2005

Couple of things.
Having read through most of the posts, it appears your screen name is confusing people. Even after you explained that you were a female using your son's name, people were still assuming that you were male. One poster seemed to attribute some of the difficulty you were having to a male's inability to take criticism from females. To avoid further confusion, I would suggest signing your first name (if it is not gender-ambiguous like Pat) at the end of your posts.
Second, you're probably going to have better results if you screen out possibly erroneous or misleading info about someone's mental diagnosis and focus strictly on behavior. It doesn't matter if this nurse is bipolar. In fact, referring to that can be seen as dsicriminatory. Fortunately, that information is unnecessary. The behavior you mentioned is wrong no matter who is doing it and no matter what their mental health status is. The last thing you want is to get into a tug of war over whether or not the nurse has mental health issues. That isn't where the attention belongs. Speak only about what she did, how you responded, and what you want to be different. The rest is for those in authority to pursue.
The more reasonable you look, the more off the charts her behavior will appear.
Good luck to you.

The only reason i mentioned about her being bipolar is that a bunch of the nurses came up to me after this happened and said she has treated others this way and using the bipolar as a reason to excuse it....I dont know if she really is bipolar, i dont know her well enough and if she is or not i was simply saying that doesnt matter what her mental condition is you still dont treat people that way.....Thats all

Michelle

Cute_CNA, CNA · Oct 11, 2005

Look, people will treat you the way you allow them to treat you, so they only get one shot to be rude. If she were rambling on an on to me like that I would have simply told her to chill out. It's amazing how much power people have over you when you allow it, and little their words seem when you don't. Blow her off, act as if her opinion doesn't matter (it dosen't). Besides, surgeons will treat you the same way right in front of their pts--so get used to the sting now.

I agree that sometimes we need to let things roll off our backs, but I don't think that this behavior should be TOLERATED. By tolerating it, it is allowed to continue, instead of standing up for ourselves and putting a stop to it. Bullies need to know that their behavior is not acceptable. Why should anyone have to suffer from it?

vandeenurse · Oct 17, 2005

She sounds like she needs an audience and is in the wrong field-actress....anyway, you are not too sensitive and she should not be precepting anyone but herself!! Maybe, next time you work, you can see if you can work with someone else.