Rejected from dream job - page 4

So I have about a year and a half of med surg nursing under my belt. I made it through two rounds of interviewing and a shadow on my dream unit and got good feedback from everyone until I was told... Read More

  1. by   KatieMI
    Quote from NurseKait_11
    I think what this poster is trying to say is that she hates when Hiring managers or whomever they interview with tells people that they did a great job and give candidates great feedback, but then turn around and not offer the job... If I am understanding correctly, it feels like lying.

    But there can be so much more going in to hiring process and not everyone is out to get you or managers are always lying to your face. You could be honestly doing a great job and getting good feedback, and yet something goes on that you're not hired. Sometimes, that's just the way it goes. You can't take it personally, as frustrating it may be. Instead, ask what you could have improved on to make you a stand-out candidate next interview.
    The following were all cases I personally experienced:

    - NM offered me a permanent position when I was in nursing residency. I submitted all the papers, etc. In two weeks, callen in office and told, with almost tears, that "her boss" doesn't allow the position. My residency ended in two weeks. One week after that, I saw this very position opening. I was in the unit, so I knew for sure that nobody suddenly died, put a notice, etc.
    Two years after, this sick as a dog "boss" was my patient. She was delighted with my care and the support I gave to her relative who was in the same MSN class and struggled badly. She made a great recovery, came to say thanks, and then I confronted her. She appeared completely flabbergasted and told that my former NM never asked her about anything like that and it was not her business anyway.

    - me and my friend both interviewed for the same position. The position had several mandatory requirements, which we both didn't satisfy 100% but I was in, say, 90% range and she was 80%. In two weeks, I got an email stating that, "although being a great candidate", I was not chosen because the above requirements. In two weeks, my friend got an offer but by then she'd found that she was to move across the country right away, so she dropped the offer. Next day, the NM personally called me. He got guts to tell me that my friend was called by a mistake and that the job was actuallly mine. My interview with him had s/s of being a fake one, to begin with.

    - I got a job offer from HR. The lady asked me to submit a copy of my passport because "we just lost one we had". To get home, make a copy and fax it took maybe 30 min. In the next hour or so I got an apologetic email about finding another "perfect" candidate with all paperwork submitted, so my offer was rescinded

    - I applied for the every position, every time there was an opening, in a unit about a dozen of times. I never got as much as negative responce. Next year, when I was doing agency placements, I got called for "emergency coverage" in this unit. I did several shifts there and found that my former "dream job" was hot bloody mess, so I let my agency know that I won't acccept any more placements there. The NM (same person as the year before) called me and offered a perm position. He spent half an hour extolling my excellencies as a nurse, person, etc. When I naively asked him why the year ago I coudn't even get an interview in his unit, he responded that it must be HR fault, as he didn't recall getting any application from me. He told that he was very sorry.

    I do not "feel like I was lied to". I know that those people lied to me. Sorry. And, yes, I do take it all VERY personally, because if I don't, and nobody doesn't, things will not change.
    Last edit by KatieMI on Sep 15
  2. by   Ruby Vee
    Quote from KatieMI
    The following were all cases I personally experienced:

    - NM offered me a permanent position when I was in nursing residency. I submitted all the papers, etc. In two weeks, callen in office and told, with almost tears, that "her boss" doesn't allow the position. My residency ended in two weeks. One week after that, I saw this very position opening. I was in the unit, so I knew for sure that nobody suddenly died, put a notice, etc.
    Two years after, this sick as a dog "boss" was my patient. She was delighted with my care and the support I gave to her relative who was in the same MSN class and struggled badly. She made a great recovery, came to say thanks, and then I confronted her. She appeared completely flabbergasted and told that my former NM never asked her about anything like that and it was not her business anyway.

    - me and my friend both interviewed for the same position. The position had several mandatory requirements, which we both didn't satisfy 100% but I was in, say, 90% range and she was 80%. In two weeks, I got an email stating that, "although being a great candidate", I was not chosen because the above requirements. In two weeks, my friend got an offer but by then she'd found that she was to move across the country right away, so she dropped the offer. Next day, the NM personally called me. He got guts to tell me that my friend was called by a mistake and that the job was actuallly mine. My interview with him had s/s of being a fake one, to begin with.

    - I got a job offer from HR. The lady asked me to submit a copy of my passport because "we just lost one we had". To get home, make a copy and fax it took maybe 30 min. In the next hour or so I got an apologetic email about finding another "perfect" candidate with all paperwork submitted, so my offer was rescinded

    - I applied for the every position, every time there was an opening, in a unit about a dozen of times. I never got as much as negative responce. Next year, when I was doing agency placements, I got called for "emergency coverage" in this unit. I did several shifts there and found that my former "dream job" was hot bloody mess, so I let my agency know that I won't acccept any more placements there. The NM (same person as the year before) called me and offered a perm position. He spent half an hour extolling my excellencies as a nurse, person, etc. When I naively asked him why the year ago I coudn't even get an interview in his unit, he responded that it must be HR fault, as he didn't recall getting any application from me. He told that he was very sorry.

    I do not "feel like I was lied to". I know that those people lied to me. Sorry. And, yes, I do take it all VERY personally, because if I don't, and nobody doesn't, things will not change.
    If you run into one rude person, you've run into a rude person. If everyone you run into is rude; YOU are the rude person.
  3. by   lpnsrock01
    I interviewed at a place that offered my dream job. I was asked as we were walking out why I left my last job.... oh seems the interview was not ended yet? I was very qualified for that job and was sent an email saying they went with someone else. I do wonder if my age played a part but..... I now work at a place doing tele-health and love it! The people are nice and helpful and the atmosphere is one of helping and fun. So glad now that I did not get my "dream" job. Keep looking and do not let one no effect the other jobs you apply for.... one more thing... if you keep seeing a job posted that you don't think you will really like, give it a shot... you never know!
  4. by   KatieMI
    Quote from Ruby Vee
    If you run into one rude person, you've run into a rude person. If everyone you run into is rude; YOU are the rude person.
    I was abused and maltreated with pretty much everyone who was not too lazy to that it since I was in kindergarten. Then, one day the boss of the agency I'd finally signed with, a nurse with 30+ years of working in pretty much every field in existence, gave me the advice which probably saved my life:

    - Katie, stop being that too much polite, friendly and helpful. It's nice, but it just doesn't work like that in real life. That's YOU who allow them to treat you like that. It's up to YOU to stop it.

    With that, she gave me a picture of her favorite pet hedgehog.

    I took her words to my heart, and things changed to better pretty quickly. So, you're right, the problem was with me... just 180 degrees other way.

    BTW, those people were absolutely not rude. They were just "professional". That's another story how meaning of this word in the USA, 2017 came to include everything from open lying to well-covered rasism and still worse vices.
  5. by   nmnnurse
    I agree sending a thank you note is appropriate. However, if this is truly your dream job, I would ask what you could do to improve your chances the next time as well. I agree that HR may have already had a person in mind when the made the final decision, possibly someone who had applied for the last opening and was passed over, but still showed interest following not being chosen on the first go.
    Last edit by nmnnurse on Sep 15 : Reason: typo
  6. by   DawnadonRN
    Don't give up hope. A few months ago, I applied for my dream job. Was told they almost always hired from within before they went to "outsiders". I just knew I had done well and knew the job was mine. It was given to an outside applicant. To make a long story short, I am now in that position. You will get there. Just keep trying.
  7. by   Orion81RN
    Quote from Sour Lemon
    Where do you see "lying into my face"? I did just wake up. Maybe I'm missing something?
    I took it as the interviewers probably acted excited to have her as a candidate and were making it sound like the job would be hers, when really they may have known they liked another candidate better.

    I wish people would be more honest. I think it's perfectly acceptable to say to an applicant that they chose someone else for the position AT THIS TIME, but hey, we do like you and please consider applying again when we have more positions opening. OR, honestly say, gain more experience and at a later opening, apply again.

    But no. In the interviews I've had, they made it sound like the job was going to be mine, all smiles and looks of excitement on their faces. Interestingly, I've always gotten the job when I felt sure the interview went poorly.
    Last edit by Orion81RN on Sep 17 : Reason: Typo
  8. by   yoganurse22
    Thank you for all the positive responses! It still stings a little but I actually ended up getting a different job within that hospital that I am really excited for that will actually expose me to almost every specialty! I am excited to get to know the hospital and my new population of patients and who knows maybe I will end up finding something I love that I didn't expect!
  9. by   Pixie.RN
    Quote from yoganurse22
    Thank you for all the positive responses! It still stings a little but I actually ended up getting a different job within that hospital that I am really excited for that will actually expose me to almost every specialty! I am excited to get to know the hospital and my new population of patients and who knows maybe I will end up finding something I love that I didn't expect!
    Congratulations! I love the positive attitude.
  10. by   elkpark
    Quote from Orion81
    I took it as the interviewers probably acted excited to have her as a candidate and were making it sound like the job would be hers, when really they may have known they liked another candidate better.

    I wish people would be more honest. I think it's perfectly acceptable to say to an applicant that they chose someone else for the position AT THIS TIME, but hey, we do like you and please consider applying again when we have more positions opening. OR, honestly say, gain more experience and at a later opening, apply again.

    But no. In the interviews I've had, they made it sound like the job was going to be mine, all smiles and looks of excitement on their faces. Interestingly, I've always gotten the job when I felt sure the interview went poorly.
    I think maybe people read too much into people being professionally pleasant in interviews. Part of their job in the interview is to present a positive impression of the organization/facility and part of doing that is by being enthusiastic about their program and about applicants. Professional, competent managers and HR people know better than to burn bridges, and aren't going to behave in a way, or say anything, that indicates that this person should leave and never come back.

    As for your recommendation about encouraging people to reapply, every time over my career I've been notified that I didn't get the job, the notification (whether verbal or by letter) has always included something about how my application will remain on file for X amount of time, and they hope I will reapply in the future for any positions that interest me.
    Last edit by elkpark on Oct 14
  11. by   elkpark
    Quote from yoganurse22
    Thank you for all the positive responses! It still stings a little but I actually ended up getting a different job within that hospital that I am really excited for that will actually expose me to almost every specialty! I am excited to get to know the hospital and my new population of patients and who knows maybe I will end up finding something I love that I didn't expect!
    Congrats!

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