Ready to give up....

  1. Here I am, a brand new nurse (licensed October 3rd) and I'm ready to give up....
    I work in LTC, on nights 7p-7a.
    I wasn't oriented, just thrown in (to the dogs, as my DON said once).
    As all places, we are extremely short staffed with CNA's. Just found out, there's been alot of complaints about me. I guess I don't answer call lights in a timely fashion. Sorry~ but when I am busy doing something, and there are 2 CNA's on the floor or in the breakroom, I feel it is their job. If I am not busy, I do answer those lights. I help whenever asked....even if I am busy.
    and...
    Complaints about treatments not being done on time. When I am the only nurse for 64 residents (which I am ALOT!), how many people am I supposed to be? (Been working by myself since I have been licensed only 2 weeks...)
    and...
    Just recently found out also that a nurse on days that I THOUGHT was my friend has been stabbing me in the back with all these little tidbits she can find. Writes little notes to the DON, complaining about things I don't get done. (She works day shift and has recently become a RN. Personally~ I think she's changed since getting her RN. Some others have come to me and they think so, so I know it isn't just me.) It's not just me she does this to, it's a few of us, I guess, but why not come to me and ask me? (Such as once, I was asked why I hadn't changed a catheter, and it wasn't time in the TX book, so I didn't!) Got my butt in a sling over that one, too! Lectured about how it's due every 30 days or so.... yea, I knew that....so why hadn't I done it? Because it wasn't marked in the TX book that it was due! Still... somehow, my fault.
    Got my first write up the other night cause I left insulin in the cart instead of putting it in the fridge. I took it, cause I knew it was my fault, and maybe that's why I'm writing this...that's just the icing on the cake for me. (The new RN above reported this one too....AND the catheter change.....)
    I am just so sick of this. I would go elsewhere, but the pay is decent, and there's really no where else in this little town to go. I feel like I am being scrutinized every time I step in the door anymore. Aren't you supposed to feel comfortable where you work in order to be at your peak performance? I feel like I can't do anything right. That everything I do is going to be questioned or double checked.
    Sorry guys~ I just needed to vent to someone who knows what it's like.. Hubby tries, but he just don't understand.
    Any suggestions or advice? I hate going to work anymore.....
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  2. 43 Comments

  3. by   fab4fan
    This is yet another example of why new nurses leave the profession.

    Strictly my opinion: You need to start looking for another job, now!! This institution is putting you in a position where your license is compromised...you are a new nurse, you should not have been left responsible for 64 pts. (I've been an RN for almost 18y and I wouldn't do that).

    The pay that is "so great" will never be worth it if you lose your license. You are already in a situation where they are documenting negative things about you...don't let them ruin your reputation.

    Good luck!
  4. by   ShandyLynnRN
    a longer commute might not be as bad as what you are experiencing now
  5. by   OBNURSEHEATHER
    Originally posted by fab4fan
    This is yet another example of why new nurses leave the profession.

    Strictly my opinion: You need to start looking for another job, now!! This institution is putting you in a position where your license is compromised...you are a new nurse, you should not have been left responsible for 64 pts. (I've been an RN for almost 18y and I wouldn't do that).

    The pay that is "so great" will never be worth it if you lose your license. You are already in a situation where they are documenting negative things about you...don't let them ruin your reputation.

    Good luck!
    Awesome post!
  6. by   renerian
    Like the wind................

    renerian
  7. by   RRMLPN
    I know exactly how you feel, i too was "thrown to the dogs" when i was a new nurse. I went in LTC right after school, charge nurse over 62 residents andsupervised 2 aides also had an awful lot of backbiting and no team effort to speak of. Needless to say i started questioning whether i even wanted to be in the nursing profession and i also started questioning my own abilities because of no positive feedback. I felt terrible and left work everyday on the verge of tears. I called my former clinical instructor and got her point of view on things and then gave my resignation to the facility that was beating me down. Don't give up!!! there are places to work out there that will support you . And remember, most of the time when you work with someone that constantly gives you s***, they prolly are so insecure of thier own abilities they have to try and make someone else look bad. Take a look around and network with people you already know and find another place that appreciates you!!
  8. by   BrandyBSN
    Get out of there Julie! as fast as you can.
  9. by   darius000
    Come and work in Western Australia!
  10. by   Purple_RN
    Hi Julie,

    I would certainly look for another job. No one should have to endure that much stress from their job. I am a relatively new nurse like you. I can completely relate to what you are saying. I started out in a family planning clinic. I enjoyed it there, but didn't really like the fast pace of the abortion clinic - it was overwhelming. An emergency situation happened when I was in the recovery room and I became the key figure in the emergency - not the doctor even though the emergency took place in the OR. It was such a shock to me, being a newbie, I completely freaked out and decided to resign when my manager wouldn't allow me to cut down my hours.

    You are certainly stronger than I am, I would have left after the first day. So what is your secret for making it through each day? Just curious. But I certainly think you should move on, with the nursing shortage there are so many opportunites for us all. Do what you want to do. For example don't work in med/surg if you absolutely hate it just because more experienced nurses tell you that is the best idea. Because when it comes down to it we need nurses everywhere who love what they do. Good luck with what ever you decide.

    Take Care,

    purple_RN
  11. by   duckie
    I say, take a cut in pay, go somewhere else and demand a decent orientation. Yes, this is why young nurses leave. I wish I had you to work with me, I'd take good care of you. A word of advice, don't trust anyone, friends change, take care of YOU first and that means...don't put your license on the line for a place that is obviously uncaring and out to eat their young. Good luck.

    Duckie:kiss
  12. by   Love-A-Nurse
    julie, although there is not any excuse for the way you are being treated, it is hard sometimes to work at a place where you are now woking in a different capacity.

    i would advise you to put in a two weeks notice and move on. you deserve better and if the don doesn't support you, well...


    you may find this is happening for good reasons to start "fresh" and do it is another working environment.

    less pay, a few more miles to drive, can be more if it means the security of your license and keeping sane.

    i will keep you in my prayers.

    i am here if you need to vent, (((((julie)))))
  13. by   katscan
    Julie, I am afraid that if you remain in this position your opinion of yourself and of nursing will continue to become more negative. You are already looking over your shoulder to see who is keeping "tabs" on you. That is not safe. No one can work and do his or her best in an environment which is hostile. There are many more places that will welcome you-you DO NOT HAVE TO PUT UP WITH THIS!!!
    Give your notice, and hold your head up high. You deserve much better. Good luck-everyone had to start out once. I only wish some of your colleagues would remember that!
  14. by   Love-A-Nurse
    originally posted by katscan
    julie, i am afraid that if you remain in this position your opinion of yourself and of nursing will continue to become more negative. you are already looking over your shoulder to see who is keeping "tabs" on you. that is not safe. no one can work and do his or her best in an environment which is hostile. there are many more places that will welcome you-you do not have to put up with this!!!
    give your notice, and hold your head up high. you deserve much better. good luck-everyone had to start out once. i only wish some of your colleagues would remember that!
    good post.

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