Quit or be fired?

Nurses General Nursing

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I have been with the same company for 4 years and have NEVER called out b/c of snow/ice storms. This weekend my two kids ages 16 and 12 will have to be alone while I'm at work and its a pretty sure thing I'll be snowed in for the whole weekend. My work is a 45 minute drive and I just feel like it's dangerous to leave them alone. I'm a single mom and usually I have a back-up plan and a second back-up plan but these have fallen through. I called and talked to my DON (the staffing nurse was fired - no warning :uhoh21: ) and she insists I have to come in no matter what. Again, I have NEVER called out on account of the weather...this is more of a child-care issue. We used to be able to bring our kids to work but that is now against the rules. In fact, besides people coming in to work not knowing they'd been fired there have been a lot of other things going on with this new administration I don't like. My question is, do I quit without giving a notice or do I let them fire me? I've been with them for 4 years and that is a large chunk of my work history. :crying2:

Specializes in Geriatric/LTC, Rehab, Home Hhealth.
I'm thinking that maybe the hospital is too short staffed to allow shift switches. Probably why she may be fired. Too bad though. That could solve a lot of problems.

I actually work at a LTC. We are short staffed every week-end. They haven't actually said they will fire me but the last few months with the new people, nurses and CNAs are being fired left and right. Last weekend a CNA showed up for work b/c she didn't know she was fired. This happened a couple of months back with a nurse as well. It was up to the weekend supervisor to let them know they had been let go. The way things are going, I am pretty sure I'll be fired. If not, I am putting in my two week notice and going back to the agency I was with.

Specializes in Geriatric/LTC, Rehab, Home Hhealth.
I was reading this thread to my husband who is an ex-cop. He once had to help prevent a mother from entering a house engulfed in flames, where she had left her children when she just "had" to get to work. If your family means anything to you, take care of them first, the rest is just employment. It was not even a major ice storm, but a tree had blown down in a wind storm, knocking out power, and the kids were trying to cook on a Coleman stove in the house. Don't listen to people who try to tell you to put your "job" ahead of your kids, trust me on this one.

Even if your kids are old enough to be left alone in normal circumstances, it is not worth the risk. If the power goes out, you will not have lights, may not have water, if you are on a well, will not have heat even if you have gas, but have an electric blower. When there is no power in the house, it does not take long to get VERY cold inside. Follow your instincts and don't listen to those with their own agenda. Your agenda must be your family. Ask any parent who has ever lost a child. Has anyone on their death bed ever said...I wish I had spent more time at the office? I applaud your dedication, it will pay off.

Dixielee - thank you for what you wrote. Its been a long time that I've cried over anything...when you're on your own you have to be "tough as nails". What you wrote brought tears to my eyes. Of course I know what to do. I'll keep my kids safe. Thank you again.

16 and 11 yr old left alone. What if there was an emergency and EMS found out they were left alone...cops called and she loses her kids??? Because they were left alone. I would loose the job before my kids.. I have been lucky not to have to make a choice....but it would be easy....family first...I remember staying at our hospital a couple nights during major snowstorm....maybe it was the nurses I worked with....but the ones without kids volunteered to stay so that the others could be with their kids, to me, a night is too long without parental supervision.....but thats my opinion, and how I was raised...

Wendy,

I want you to know I feel that you deserve a good parent award for really thinking this issue through and putting the kids first. I am ashamed of the posters who feel that 16 and 12 are old enough to be left alone in circumstances like this. I have an acquaintence who left her kids alone for less than 30 minutes and the DHHS took a hard look at her. It was late, bad weather, electric flickering, and she needed to run to the local store(less than 2 miles for bread and milk) another person hit her, when the cops came she was upset because she had been gone longer than she told her kids, the cop decided to let DHHS know.She went through some bad scenes with workers until they decided she could keep her kids. Her kids were 12 and 14.

It is the DON's job to staff the facility if you cannot be there, so she probably just wants to stay home with her kids and make sure they are safe. I understand about the no kids rule and nasty bugs, but if there can't be exceptions made in circumstances like this, then look for another job. Hopefully, another facility will be more understanding. Good luck and let us know how it goes.

Contrary to some beliefs, the facility will continue to stand if you have to call out. This isn't some kind of perverse contest to have the best "I walked barefoot to school uphill both ways in a blizzard" one-upsmanship. There is not one among us that is irreplaceable in our jobs no matter HOW good of an employee/nurse we may be. Commitment is great....when it's reciprocated. If you buy into the whole theory of absolutely MUST come in no matter WHAT, then don't be surprised or complain when coworkers are compelled to lie in order to keep their jobs. You can't have it both ways.

I haven't called out on account of child care in 4 years! I'd say thats a pretty good track record for being a single mom. I don't have had an excellent attendance record by accident, it takes a lot of planning and back-up planning as well. In this case, I will most likely be fired b/c when my plans and back-up plans have fallen through, I picked my kids over my job and I'm not ashamed of that. I couldn't not hold down a job, go to school and raise and care for my kids if I wasn't a good planner. I am sorry if it sounds like I am venting... total lack of acknowledging that I have spent four years making sure I am on time for my shifts is what I got from my adminstration...very hurtful considering my record.

I have been following your post. You had a tough decision to make and in my humble opinion you made the right one. I have lost two children. Children cannot be replaced. Sometimes without even knowing it we have a gut feeling something tragic may happen. From what I have read you had two back up plans, both fell through. Everything happens for a reason. It would be a shame to lose your job, but even if there was a remote chance something could happen, and did, you would never forgive yourself. Sometimes when one door closes another one opens. Be safe, warm, and hug your babies.

Linda

I actually work at a LTC. We are short staffed every week-end. They haven't actually said they will fire me but the last few months with the new people, nurses and CNAs are being fired left and right. Last weekend a CNA showed up for work b/c she didn't know she was fired. This happened a couple of months back with a nurse as well. It was up to the weekend supervisor to let them know they had been let go. The way things are going, I am pretty sure I'll be fired. If not, I am putting in my two week notice and going back to the agency I was with.

Well you put in your notice fer sure!!!! These people must have no concept of the insincts that go with being a mother. I do know...even though I am not a mom(per say).....that the fear of the possible although maybe improbable will prevent you from putting your job first. Please don't think i am downplaying your situation.

There are people here who say they are ashamed that I feel children of 16 and 12 can be left alone but all I say is why not. Because of the way "I was raised"

we are actually MORE prepared than parents in an emerg situation. But then thats here in the land of "big time snow". There really isn't more a parent can do in a power blackout than cell phone for help, break out the flash lights, bundle up and tear into the pre stored food in the pantry.Seriously...what more can you do? If you have smart kids...who know not to put on a fire stove in a closed space, and.....to keep warm and call for help on the cell...what can you do except do the same? Depending on your situation, whether or not you are able to get a new job right away.....maybe preparing your children for a possible situation will benefit them in the long run.

Think of this.....if say a tree should fall on the house..misss the children....but fall on you...what good is that?

Teach the "children" and stop treating them like...babies. You would be suprised at how they surpass your expectations in the end.

With that said...this is my opinion...only my experience and my hear say from other "kids" like myself who lived through the "ice storm" of 1998.(and others in the past when we were ....10) Our parents knew jack.....it was us who got them through it!!!!!

Please dont get all mad at me for this.Maybe its just us here in Canada who treat our...future adults differently.

good luck

Z

I am so mad! :angryfire I went in to work last night for 10-6 and this morning three of the eight CNAs showed up for work. The other CNAs all claimed to have worked late last weekend, so the idiot LPN in charge of replacing the staff that had called in, let everyone go and told me that I had to stay. Everyone from night shift left and I was forced to work an hour extra. I was mad but I worked hard. When the weekend manager showed up she told me to go home. I have been up since 5:30 yesterday morning. I had class all day yesterday and then had to run errands until I went to work at ten. I look and feel like crap. We sent a patient out last night to R/O hip fracture, they sent her back this morning, the ambulacne hit a patch of ice, slid out of the road and then got rear ened by a state police cruiser going to a wreck just up the road. They had already stopped at six wrecks on the way from the hospital. We sent on out for dialysis and the county ambulance service is ordering them to come back. I almost fell up the stairs at the house coming in to the house everything is ice. I poured a lot of salt on the steps when I got in. I just heard on the scanner that the back up ambulance picked up my resident from the damaged ambulance and are heading to the facility. They are saying that we can expect a lot of ice and then one to two inches of snow.

Okay What happened?

As far as back up plans...for me I only work every other weekend and DH watches them. If he can't or works sometimes MIL or my mom will watch them for a few hrs. I am not full time so I don't have back ups lined up. That is all I have. Sometimes they are unavailable. I totally understand about not having a second and third back up plan. This is why I only work every other weekend and don't or can't come in when they call me every other day.

If my kids were older like yours I prob would drag them to work with me! Make it a community service thing for them. ( I'm in LTC) would probably put them in the staff room with a tv. But then again, I might just call off. (I never call off either...I figure I have it comming! )

Hope you were able to figure something out!

I am so mad! :angryfire I went in to work last night for 10-6 and this morning three of the eight CNAs showed up for work. The other CNAs all claimed to have worked late last weekend, so the idiot LPN in charge of replacing the staff that had called in, let everyone go and told me that I had to stay. Everyone from night shift left and I was forced to work an hour extra. I was mad but I worked hard. When the weekend manager showed up she told me to go home. I have been up since 5:30 yesterday morning. I had class all day yesterday and then had to run errands until I went to work at ten. I look and feel like crap. We sent a patient out last night to R/O hip fracture, they sent her back this morning, the ambulacne hit a patch of ice, slid out of the road and then got rear ened by a state police cruiser going to a wreck just up the road. They had already stopped at six wrecks on the way from the hospital. We sent on out for dialysis and the county ambulance service is ordering them to come back. I almost fell up the stairs at the house coming in to the house everything is ice. I poured a lot of salt on the steps when I got in. I just heard on the scanner that the back up ambulance picked up my resident from the damaged ambulance and are heading to the facility. They are saying that we can expect a lot of ice and then one to two inches of snow.

(((hugz))))))))))...and a valium. :chuckle I know how easy it is to lose it over weather. Ice is a menace to society!!

Z

Specializes in pedi, pedi psych,dd, school ,home health.

Wendy, I think you made the right decision. I was telling my girls (22 and 20) aboout your post, and they both looked at me and saie, "Is she kidding?? they would fire her because she put her kids lives first?? Glad I'm not a nurse, they would fire me" Hmmmmm, this coming from 2 kids who have0 watched me wrok full time plus, and go to school their whole lives. Enjoy your weekend, hug your kids, and know that you have much support. Mary

What are you risking job vs. kids. The job is placing you in this situation, which shows quality of support and commitment to you. You are questioning weather or not you should risk your kids' safety for a job that will not even support you in an emergency. If I were in your situation, I would already be looking for a job. Do not quit until you have found another job. You are the one who decides what an acceptable work environment is but it does not sound like this is a place that you want to make a career. Make sure that you call in on both days that you miss so that they do not have a legitimate reason to terminate you. :angryfire

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