Please Help Me - page 3

Hi. Some of you may have read in some of my other posts about my father. My father is 60 years old and and end-stage alcoholic. We have had him in 30 day programs and de-tox for 5 days, at least... Read More

  1. by   fergus51
    I am so sorry Suzy. I wish things were not so hard for your family.
  2. by   lisadavis
    Suzy K just keep talking. talk here. talk to minister, counselor, friend. whoever you feel comfortable confiding in. you have to walk through these bad times and no one can change that for you but you DO NOT HAVE TO WALK ALONE!!!!!!
  3. by   judy ann
    Dear Suzy K, As the adult (some question that) child of alcoholic parents, I know where you are. Al-Anon is one very good way to go, Remember, there is strength in numbers.
    So far as the psychic (or is that psycho?) If they were any good, they could predict lottery numbers, or winning horses and clean up. Nough said.
    Suzy, you need to remember your dad is a grown up, even if he doesn't behave like one. You can't be his caretaker. He has to want help before anyone can help him, and it sounds as though he doesn't want help---yet. The one thing that you can do for him is talk to God. Say a prayer for his wellbeing. Say a prayer for his deciding that he needs help. And , remember that you have tons of friends that want to help you. You've reached out to this group, and i'm sure that those of us that are so inclined will include your dad in our prayers also. Keep the Faith, and remember God loves you and so do I.
    Last edit by judy ann on Mar 16, '02
  4. by   incognito
    I am a Christian. I don't want to ruffel any feathers here, but I would pray to the Lord about this.......DO NOT LISTEN TO PSYCHIC crap! It is not truth. I believe that there are people out there with "special powers" or whatever but they are using them for their own self glory and gain; like soothersayers in the bible.
  5. by   live4today
    Hi Suzy K,

    There is plenty you can still do for your dad! Do you believe in the power of prayer? Then start praying without ceasing, and all of us on this BB who have shared our concern with you on this thread will continue to lift your dad, your other family members, and yourself up in prayer.

    [Wherever two or three believers are gathered in My Name (referring to Jesus here), there I (Jesus) will be also, and whatever you ask in prayer will be given unto you.] (Paraphrased scripture from The Bible)

    Suzy, it sure sounds like there are more than three believers gathered here, so we will all agree to lift this situation up in prayer, surrendering its outcome to our Almighty God for Him to guide and direct according to His Perfect Will for all involved.

    God may not come when we want Him, but He's always 'right on time! Trust in Him, Suzy K. Let go and let God take care of you, your father, and your other family members in this situation. Begin to see your glass half full instead of half empty where your father is concerned. Being positive is so much better than being negative and downhearted for the latter has never gotten any of us anywhere.

    :kisses and (((HUGS))) to you. May you rest in God's Perfect Peace this night. God created your father. HE knows all about him from before conception throughout his entire life. Even before your father knew you - Suzy K - God was there for him. Start praying peaceful thoughts and a spirit of surrender tonight, even if your heart and mind aren't quite there yet, let your spirit stay tuned in to God's Spirit, and things will be brighter in the morning.

    After every storm, there's a rainbow! A sign of God's Promise that He has never left us alone to fight our own battles. Do what you can do for your dad, and that which you cannot do, surrender it to God. It's way too big for you, Suzy K. Let go! Loving you from a distance! :kisses
    Last edit by live4today on Mar 16, '02
  6. by   Q.
    Renee-
    I am a Catholic, and I often pray to God about my father. But it is soooooo hard to just put my faith in Him like that - because all I see is my dad being unsafe, not well, and in pain. But I guess that is why it's called faith.
  7. by   live4today
    I understand, Suzy K. It's okay to feel as you do. Sometimes when we can't find the words to pray, or cling to the faith that God will prevail in a given situation that worries us, we turn to others who are not as emotionally connected to the situation and ask others to pray for us. You have done that here by sharing this with us on this thread. Therefore, we will pray for you and continue to lift you higher in God's Perfect Love, and pray for His Perfect Peace to sustain you in your hour of need, and in that of your father's as well. You must be sooooo exhausted! (((HUGS))) and :kisses. I do hope and pray your rest tonight will be perfect for you. Sleep is good for the body, especially in times of great stress and worry.
  8. by   mattsmom81
    What an insightful thread and it is truly amazing how many nurses have alcoholic parents, isn't it? This fact alone should give us 'cause for pause' as we deal with one another, as the issues of children of alcoholics reemerge in our workplace dealings with one another......BIG lightbulb going on here!

    Susy, I lost my ETOH Dad last year to cancer and although it was very difficult, it pales in comparison to what your family is going through and my heart goes out to you all. Will your mother consider a placement of any kind or is that out of the question?

    My thoughts and prayers will be with you. Alanon was helpful to me as I struggled to understand the ongoing ramifications of the disease of addiction. I see the codependency in my own child and struggle to right the wrong to this day.

    God Bless!
  9. by   semstr
    Aw God Suzy,

    Don't know what to write here, everything important was written already.
    Thinking and praying for you, take care, Renee
  10. by   grouchy
    Suzy, I'm so sorry to hear that your Dad is not doing well. Maybe you should let your nursing instructors know now that you have a family crisis, and see if you can work out a plan so if anything happens before your next test or paper you won't get in trouble. I know that probably seems like the least of your problems now, but it might be a good move. Can you spend some time with your Dad, and just let him know you love him? Good luck- I'll be praying for you and your family.
  11. by   Nebby Nurse
    Susy you are powerless to change the heart-breaking situation. You have to pray with all your might to be able to "accept the thing I can not change" as they say in AA. Be there to support your family. My mother drank herself to death. She died alone in a seedy apt. Empty liquor bottles in every cupboard, under the bed, under the sink. This was an intelligent funny woman years ago. She could never get it together and alcohol completely took over. I cling to the memories of her brief periods of sobriety. You have to distance yourself emotionally to be able to survive. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
  12. by   mattsmom81
    How difficult it must be to watch someone you love do this to themselves, Nebby and Susy.

    My father was a binger vs a daily drinker...the cancer got him before the ETOH could. How awful to know your parent has the power to live and chose to drink him/herself to death and you couldn't stop it...I can't imagine how that must be but I'm praying for you both. (((hugs)))
  13. by   Q.
    Originally posted by Nebby Nurse
    Susy you are powerless to change the heart-breaking situation. You have to pray with all your might to be able to "accept the thing I can not change" as they say in AA. Be there to support your family. My mother drank herself to death. She died alone in a seedy apt. Empty liquor bottles in every cupboard, under the bed, under the sink. This was an intelligent funny woman years ago. She could never get it together and alcohol completely took over. I cling to the memories of her brief periods of sobriety. You have to distance yourself emotionally to be able to survive. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
    My god Nebby. How horrible. Then you understand how I feel, how difficult this is. I fear my father will have the same ending as your mother. Tell me, were you relieved when she died? I feel horrible for even asking.....


    Mattsmom - thanks for your words. Every little bit from people help.

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