Other nurses being abusive against other nurses.

  1. Let's talk about other nurses being abusive against other nurses. Degrading them and telling them they have psychiatric disorders. Attempting to diagnose them with "bipolar" disorder. Knowing that this nurse does suffer with depression, taking advantage of that and calling them crazy and degrading them with every chance. Using them. Treating them like a yo-yo. Degrading their appearance, their actions, and their character. Yeah these nurses exist, and they are among us. Some of them even HERE on all Allnurses. I can name a few, but won't.

    Let's end nurse on nurse abuse.
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  2. 47 Comments

  3. by   vanilla bean
    Quote from CardiacDork
    Let's talk about other nurses being abusive against other nurses. Degrading them and telling them they have psychiatric disorders. Attempting to diagnose them with "bipolar" disorder. Knowing that this nurse does suffer with depression, taking advantage of that and calling them crazy and degrading them with every chance. Using them. Treating them like a yo-yo. Degrading their appearance, their actions, and their character. Yeah these nurses exist, and they are among us. Some of them even HERE on all Allnurses. I can name a few, but won't.

    Let's end nurse on nurse abuse.
    This sounds like a specific situation that you are trying to turn into a wholesale indictment on nurses in general.
  4. by   CardiacDork
    Quote from vanilla bean
    This sounds like a specific situation that you are trying to turn into a wholesale indictment on nurses in general.
    Definitely not all nurses... but one in specific.
    (I'm a nurse too obviously so...) but yeah totally one person in specific... yep.
  5. by   Castiela
    Well, if it's happening at work, ask the person to stop and document incidences, what was specifically said and witnesses and present it to HR. Bullying isn't specific to nursing.. But I'm sorry someone is doing this to you
  6. by   CardiacDork
    Quote from Castiela
    Well, if it's happening at work, ask the person to stop and document incidences, what was specifically said and witnesses and present it to HR. Bullying isn't specific to nursing.. But I'm sorry someone is doing this to you
    Not at work, thank God.
  7. by   That Guy
    Then deal with it in private if it is about one person.
  8. by   Emergent
    If this is happening at allnurses, use the yellow triangle report link. I'm sure it's against the rules here to be insulting and accuse people of having mental disorders.

    I just want to mention that I've been on other forums and there are always people who are insulting. Sometimes the Internet unleashes the worst in people.
  9. by   KatieMI
    Quote from Castiela
    Well, if it's happening at work, ask the person to stop and document incidences, what was specifically said and witnesses and present it to HR. Bullying isn't specific to nursing.. But I'm sorry someone is doing this to you
    I've been in one unit where I would have to wear a bodycam and dictophone to "document incidences". Seriously, it was THAT bad.

    The problem is, for multiple reasons lateral violence is now close to social norm in nursing. I do not have time to go through research right now but I posted links on this forum more than once. Researchers put numbers up to 80+% "overall" for newly graduated nurses, including all kinds of violence. In my circle numbers are 90%+ ("best and brightest" high academic achievers) to 100% (accent-speaking foreign-born nurses, many of them high-achievers as well; the latter group also had about 75% of personally experiencing physical violence from colleagues).

    Since workplace violence became so ingrained in nursing culture, and even advocated under premice of "nursing is a tough job, so let's not coddling 'em" and, in reality, CAN is some cases be difficult to discriminate from "contstructive criticism", I think that it should be codified the same way as rape and domestic abuse. The law has pretty clear lines dividing what is "legal" and what is not in all multitudes of personal and sexual relationships between humans, therefore I cannot see why professional relationships should be any different. At least "constructive criticism" which inflicted long-term negative sequela for the victim's health (as it is in my personal case) should be considered a criminal act.

    Once mid-level management (which is, IMHO, the main supporter and perpetrator of workplace violence) knows that such and such RNs lost their licenses and were sentenced to real jail time and a fat fine for harrassing a new grad, the process will come to halting stop, and within two or three "professional generations" this hellish culture dies out. Meanwhile, I would advice every new grad to secure relationship with a workplace lawyer before accepting any job and never, ever go to management office alone, "just for a short talk" or otherwise.
  10. by   KatieMI
    Quote from That Guy
    Then deal with it in private if it is about one person.
    It is never about "one person". Bullies do not act completely alone as they are always cowards and wouldn't shoot until feeling "protected" by their immediate management, and probably also by "unit core", the rest of it might not be directly involved but just enjoying the show nevertheless.

    We all have our likes and dislikes of people. What makes bully a bully is a feeling of being invincible and free of sequela, whatever they do.
  11. by   Castiela
    Quote from KatieMI
    I've been in one unit where I would have to wear a bodycam and dictophone to "document incidences". Seriously, it was THAT bad.

    The problem is, for multiple reasons lateral violence is now close to social norm in nursing. I do not have time to go through research right now but I posted links on this forum more than once. Researchers put numbers up to 80+% "overall" for newly graduated nurses, including all kinds of violence. In my circle numbers are 90%+ ("best and brightest" high academic achievers) to 100% (accent-speaking foreign-born nurses, many of them high-achievers as well; the latter group also had about 75% of personally experiencing physical violence from colleagues).

    Since workplace violence became so ingrained in nursing culture, and even advocated under premice of "nursing is a tough job, so let's not coddling 'em" and, in reality, CAN is some cases be difficult to discriminate from "contstructive criticism", I think that it should be codified the same way as rape and domestic abuse. The law has pretty clear lines dividing what is "legal" and what is not in all multitudes of personal and sexual relationships between humans, therefore I cannot see why professional relationships should be any different. At least "constructive criticism" which inflicted long-term negative sequela for the victim's health (as it is in my personal case) should be considered a criminal act.

    Once mid-level management (which is, IMHO, the main supporter and perpetrator of workplace violence) knows that such and such RNs lost their licenses and were sentenced to real jail time and a fat fine for harrassing a new grad, the process will come to halting stop, and within two or three "professional generations" this hellish culture dies out. Meanwhile, I would advice every new grad to secure relationship with a workplace lawyer before accepting any job and never, ever go to management office alone, "just for a short talk" or otherwise.
    I wouldn't say it's the social norm in nursing. I've only met one or two nurses like that. I feel it would be more accurate to say Bullying is a social norm in specific worksites.
  12. by   KatieMI
    Quote from Emergent
    If this is happening at allnurses, use the yellow triangle report link. I'm sure it's against the rules here to be insulting and accuse people of having mental disorders.

    I just want to mention that I've been on other forums and there are always people who are insulting. Sometimes the Internet unleashes the worst in people.
    Please see my post #8. Anonimous chat room with a million of similarly anonimous IP holders, with the maximal possible "punishment" being a ban and close to 100% chance that there will be someone supporting your opinion, however egrerious, is a dream come true for someone thirsty for power but with no real outlet to exercise it in the reality.

    Over my years of quietly and privately battling workplace abuse and studying its nature and causes, I made a curious observation. Some (not all, but definitely quite high%) of classic "mean girl" nurses became way more, that's to say, adequate in their professional relationships after they, for one reason or another, were pulled from bedside and made responsible for just one clearly cut problem well within their scope of practice which didn't require much communication and cooperation, especially with other nurses. Those of them who had to continue managing things like diabetic education, continued to have temper tantrums every time a new grad RN didn't blow full "hypoglycemia protocol" with asymptomatic patient and CBG of 69 with lunch ordered and on its way. But those who were made responsible for things like calling every patient within 72 hours after discharge from Cardio PCU (for hospital readmission prevention program), "navigation" or preop ID control, became more tolerable, and some of them expressed feeling guilty for their past behaviors. I truly wonder why it is so, and if giving these people a bit more knowledge and positive power and appreciating their other abilities while removing them from high stress enviroinment and easy access to vulnerable new grads could be another possible way to help everyone involved.
  13. by   CardiacDork
    This is not workplace abuse but I'm glad a lively and productive discussion could come from this.
  14. by   Farawyn
    Quote from KatieMI
    It is never about "one person". Bullies do not act completely alone as they are always cowards and wouldn't shoot until feeling "protected" by their immediate management, and probably also by "unit core", the rest of it might not be directly involved but just enjoying the show nevertheless.

    We all have our likes and dislikes of people. What makes bully a bully is a feeling of being invincible and free of sequela, whatever they do.
    He said it was. One person.
    If it is on AN, report the abuser to the mods and/or try to settle it on PM.

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