Ya know I've kinda always been known as a nice polite respectful young thing , go with the flow kinda gal but something that was said to me a little while ago really rubbed me the wrong way.
We were discussing organ donation at work , and I was talking about how I think its crazy for organs to go to waste and a little about how its terrible that so many people die while waiting on a the transplant list etc etc when someone suggested that organ donation seemed to be a political cause of mine and that I should respect the fact that some people just find it apphaling to donate a loved ones organs and that a person should be "buried whole and complete".
I respect everyones right to an opinion on any and every topic, firm believer in the fact that we can really all agree to disagree on some things, but this person made it seem to all around that I was pimping some big political agenda and couldnt see the other side of the story.
what I wanted to say to her but didnt ,and what I will share with you my trusted friends is that my "political cause" has a name, Rena.
Growing up the person I felt closest too was always my aunt Rena, she lived half an hour away yet her home seemed like home to me. We would always joke that I was meant to be her daughter because we were so much alike. I picked up on many Rena'isms growing up, some great like my ability to see the good in most everyone, some not so great, like the fact I wear my heart on my sleeve and get taken advantage of many times. Rena, my moms oldest sister was the person I admired most in my life, gave me my first haircut - thus starting the infamous "wendy looks like a little boy with a dress on" photo collection, she held my hand when I got my ear pierced - yep I said ear, I was such a wimp that I could only stand one ear to be done!, when my parents were caught up in the swirling events of my fathers affair and the breakdown of their marriage my aunt Rena got this life of mine back on track. It wasnt easy being 12 and having your world fall apart before your eyes, it was made much easier by knowing that there was at least one person on this planet who was there for you, regardless of time or circumstance.
My mom lost her sister Mary in 1995, she got extremely ill and to this day we dont know exactly what caused her death, but Mary being the nurse she was probably realized that she was very sick and did not want to live the way she saw many of her patients live and die. Mary was 54 when she died. My aunt Rena was the one to snap us all out of the sadness we were feeling, the life of the party. She started feeling ill herself and finally after much prompting by all of her friends and her family she went to the doctor. I only wish I was a nurse with some medical knowledge back then because surely I could have seen some signs or symptoms of what turned out to be advance stage liver disease. People assumed left right and center that my aunt Rena was a drinker, far from it , she was married to an alcoholic for years and never had a drop to drink.... the doctors agreed that she had many congenital liver problems and would need a transplant. She accepted this , refused to get down about it and life pretty much carried on. Until one day she got so sick she would have to be flown to a regional transplant center and spend the rest of her wait there.
by this time I was graduating highschool, falling in love for the first time , trying to figure out what to do with my life and worried sick about my aunt Rena. We didnt live in the same city as the regional transplant center so we made frequent trips each time they thought they had a liver, and then it would go to someone sicker, or wasnt suitable etc. One time my aunt even got to the OR and then was returned because the organ wasnt suitable, she woke up thinking she had her transplant already. then on mothers day 1996 we got word that there was a liver on the way for her, the roller coaster of emotions just boiled over.....so excited happy scared nervous, I went to her early that morning and told her all the things I was feeling and that she was gonna be just fine! 8 and a half hours later they let me in the recovery room to see her, the Dr said that we were lucky cuz she was on borrowed time with that liver of hers....recovery wise she had setbacks , wasnt breathing great, not maintaining sats, infections etc so she had to be trached - this happened on her 56th birthday. All in all the road was extremely hard,but not unbearable, until we learned that the anti rejection drugs had fostered the growth of an inoperable brain tumour , she died in september at 56 years old , my mom lost both her sisters within 1 calendar year and I lost my number one fan,biggest supporter and the person who understood me the most.
til the day she died her liver worked wonderfully...she could have lived from that transplant, I am forever in debt to the family who made that tough decision , although it didnt work out, the choice to donate that liver mattered to people, it mattered to me and it mattered to my aunt.
hearing someone trivilize all I went through by calling it a political cause just got to me
sorry for rambling
you really would have loved my aunt Rena guys..
there are few people in this world that you could listen to forver , turn to for support, who make you smile just by being around and who care about everyone they encounter, she was one of these people.
