Nursing Instructor from hell - page 2
Hey all my friend recently informed me that her nursing instructor told her that she didn't think she was going to make it. My friend is in her 1st semester of nursing school and she said the... Read More
Jun 4, '09Hey you all thanks for your advice and support. I knew that I wasn't in the wrong for telling my friend that. She is very hardworking and smart so I know she can do it. She does have a tendency to get too paranoid over things( hence the other instructors are going to be out to get her statement) so that's why I know she can do it. Oh by the way we are both in. I am just out for the summer.
Jun 4, '09Quote from Virgo_RNDon't switch! The school can perceive this negatively. They can say something like oh, she runs away from her problems instead of solving it. And they can also generalize this issue and say, if she runs away from her problems, how can she convince physicians to do something in their power (assessment, prescribe medications and etc). Is the nurse just going to go to another physican to get him to do what the nurse wants?I think she should take the instructor's feedback and use it to improve.
Jun 4, '09I just know that it is difficult to win with college faculty.
(1) A clinical instructor who was emotionally erratic (ironically, during my mental health rotation). She told us something different every week, and what was right last week was wrong this week. She seemed to have a "scapegoat of the week" who she rode mercilessly the whole time. My turn cost me a 4.0 GPA for the nursing program. The lead instructors seemed to know something was wrong, because after the semester they called several of us in and asked us about this instructor. She was not invited back. (In a twist of irony, she applied to work on the first unit I worked on after graduation. My nurse manager asked me about her, and I essentially killed her application.)
(2) A nursing instructor who openly voiced her disdain for men in nursing. The semester before she was caught altering the grades of a male student on an examination so that he would fail. The student noticed when he got his test back that a lot of the answers had been changed (we used pencils on our answer sheets), so he reported it. Because she had tenure, she was still there to teach me - which made me very uncomfortable.
Jun 4, '09Quote from Daytonitei dont even understand where this response comes from... seriously. how does it even make sense?I think you should mind your own business and keep your opinions to yourself. Have you not learned anything about assessment and observations? This "friend" is telling you things that may or may not be true in order to hide her embarrassment. She is telling you what she wants you to hear. You don't know the instructor's side of the situation. It's unfortunate that your friend is having difficulties. But you weren't there and you don't know the entire situation. Stay out of this. If you haven't already learned about active listening, now would be a good time to learn it. If your friend is failing, that is sad. Support her, be sympathetic, encourage her to examine her feelings and actions, but I think it is pretty cruel of you to not to let her make her own decisions. We should never tell people what to do without knowing all the facts. It robs them of their self-worth and self-esteem.
just keep being supportive mslee. youre doing the right thing. you didn't show judgement for or against the school, and basically tried to shift your friends focus on doing better.
Jun 4, '09"I think you should mind your own business and keep your opinions to yourself. Have you not learned anything about assessment and observations?"
Obviously someone skipped empathy 101!
Jun 4, '09one of my nursing instructors i had, i also thought was a nightmare until i realized she really truly prepared me better than i ever imagined..
Jun 4, '09I hope that she is just preparing your friend to be observant and excellent. If it turns out that she is harassing your friend needlessly, then she needs to consider the chain of command at school. To me it sounds like she is just trying to teach her to be professional. Tell your friend to take a step back and to review the all of the situations, and see if there are repeat situations as well. If this is the case, it could be frustrating to the clinical instructor who may feel that your friend should be catching on to the rhythm of things by now. Just a suggestion......
Jun 4, '09Quote from mslee2121i took another look at the ops post. the statement that "she thinks her clinical instructor has bad mouthed her to other teachers and she thinks they are out to get her" is a bit worrisome. she should assure her friend that what goes on between students and instructors is confidential. at this point the only one telling others that she isn't "going to make it" is the student herself and she really needs to stop telling people this. the more she repeats that statement the more she gives it power over her. i would have also asked her if the instructor provided direction talked with her about the correct way to have done these incorrect things she was criticized for so she knows exactly how to improve on them.hey all my friend recently informed me that her nursing instructor told her that she didn't think she was going to make it. my friend is in her 1st semester of nursing school and she said the instructor told her this is because she had linens on the floor, and didn't throw away the dirty linens fast enough. also, the instructor told her that she should have said 32 residuals for a feeding tuble instead of 30. don't you think that assessment the nursing instructor made was out of line? she also said she thinks her clinical instructor has bad mouthed her to other teachers and she thinks she may need to change programs so she won't feel they are out to get her. i said she should stay and prove them wrong. what do you all think?
Jun 4, '09This is something I feel very strongly about!
You gave her great advice to stick it out and show them and herself that she CAN do it no matter what any of the instructors say!
I was pregnant and was told by 4 instructors including the dean of nursing to drop out because it would be too much work to be in ICU with a new baby, there would be no way I could do it, and to go and drop the rest of my classes, and I could "prove them wrong" if I wanted too, but I would be setting myself up for failure.
Needless to say it was a great feeling to be pinned right along with all of my other classmates, and to show off my baby at the same time!
Just my experience with negative feedback, it can be done!
Jun 4, '09Daytonight -- keep in mind that this is her friend, not a patient. We're allowed to offer suggestions to friends and support them, even if they are wrong. Friends call friends to vent about things and you're darn right that what they have to say is usually one-sided and possibly truth stretching.
People need to have a place to vent, not a place to spew out their feelings and thoughts only to have them corrected in an accusatory tone (see your post and count all of the accusatory "you"s you wrote).
Jun 5, '09Ms Lee, I think there is nothing wrong with encouraging your friend to stick things out. We all need a little boost now and then, even out of school.
She does need to work through the instructor thing on her own in the sense that she has to figure out how to handle this instructor. Some like you to kiss their butts..I used to call this the "nod and smile" technique. Even if the instructor wasn't the sharpest pencil in the box(and there are some like this) as long as she wasn't teaching me something dangerous, I just did it the way she wanted.
Instructors are human..some let their biases/dislikes/ etc get the best of them. I have seen people singled out and sometimes, they were the good students. It sucks, but much of nursing school is learning to fly under the radar. Guess it's good practice for the real nursing world, because there will be coworkers who try to drag you down too. But, there are others who will have your back and it sounds like you're shaping up to be one of these, which is awesome.:spin:
Jun 5, '09Quote from DaytoniteThere's a difference between advice/encouragement and making decisions for someone else. I didn't see anything in the OP that indicated that she was making the decision for her friend.I think you should mind your own business and keep your opinions to yourself. Have you not learned anything about assessment and observations? This "friend" is telling you things that may or may not be true in order to hide her embarrassment. She is telling you what she wants you to hear. You don't know the instructor's side of the situation. It's unfortunate that your friend is having difficulties. But you weren't there and you don't know the entire situation. Stay out of this. If you haven't already learned about active listening, now would be a good time to learn it. If your friend is failing, that is sad. Support her, be sympathetic, encourage her to examine her feelings and actions, but I think it is pretty cruel of you to not to let her make her own decisions. We should never tell people what to do without knowing all the facts. It robs them of their self-worth and self-esteem.
You make a good point about the friend telling her side of the story, as we all tend to do, and some gentle but persistent questioning is in order to flesh out the record. One of the skills needed for nursing is an ability to discern when patients are giving you the whole story, and this is an opportunity to develop that knack.
That said, imho, it would be cruel to refuse to respond to a friend who asked for advice, unless one was convinced that the friend was withholding critical facts.