Nurses EAT their own!!! Help! - page 4
:o I am getting very depressed. I was working in a small OB office until last October. I worked with different women and we had our days but worked things out. Well, I started at a hospital... Read More
Mar 13, '03I'm a little late, but I'd like a Cosmo please!!
Women are catty, and territorial - PERIOD! End of discussion.
Mar 13, '03Unless you are very tough skinned and dont care about fitting in, my advise is leave. If you stay and it goes against your grain but you find yourself unable to stand up to it, it will be toxic to you emotionally. Best wishes to ya.
Mar 13, '03Originally posted by NurseShell
Women are catty, and territorial - PERIOD! End of discussion.
As I said before, in my experience in the corporate world, men are at least as territorial as women; they're just more aggressive about it. So what? It's not a valid excuse for someone of either gender to treat a colleague like crap.
Mar 13, '03It's called but not very nice, nurses eat thier young and it happens all the time. I saw it happen in the hospital all the time....no matter what mostly from the fact that not only are you taking care of way to many patients and then you have this snot- nosed.....sorry for the terminology new nurse that is following you around that has had only one or two patients during thier student days and you have to work with them and all those patients.
I can remember when I came to work for corrections, there were about 4 older and wiser nurses that rode me like there was no tomorrow. I came very close to quitting cause I didn't think that I could do anything right. But through the years I started to realize that they weren't riding me cause they were mean but they were trying to make me the best correctional nurse that I could be and I am now glad that they were that way. I just hope that I am not that way to the younger staff but there are times that I am.....
Mar 13, '03Originally posted by psychonurse
...no matter what mostly from the fact that not only are you taking care of way to many patients and then you have this snot- nosed.....sorry for the terminology new nurse that is following you around that has had only one or two patients during thier student days and you have to work with them and all those patients.
I just hope that I am not that way to the younger staff but there are times that I am.....
Mar 13, '03It's a WOMAN thing. I worked in a insurance company prior to nursing...all women it was the same problem.
I'm starting on a new unit/hospital. I'm so happy how nice/helpful they are. I'm really enjoying it at this hospital. I'm hired to float between two units/eventually three units.
So I hear the backstabbing that occurs. It occurs at lunch. I thought maybe I should stay away from people...don't really socialize with my fellow colleagues...but that's not me. I'm a quiet person...but I love conversing or talking to others. So I've decided to join everyone at lunch but stay neutral in the backstabbing conversations. (don't say anything at all)
Mar 13, '03Originally posted by KC CHICK
I know this sounds bad, but ...here it goes anyway....
I think this backstabbing is a problem of WOMEN and not of nurses in general. I've worked with men in an office environment (before I became a nurse)...and they don't behave in the catty way that women tend to do. Working with women in that same office, I observed much backstabbing and rudeness.
Sorry to say gals (myself included), but I see it as a gender issue...not a nursing issue. -OR- A gender issue that affects nursing....that might be a better way to put it.
Mar 13, '03Let's see -women are witchy and it causes work problems.
Men are not witchy and start wars.
Men are in jail more often for violent crimes.
Men commit suicide more often.
Men are happier married than single. Women are happier single than married. When men get divorced, they seek to be remarried, women do not. (studies have shown this repeatedly).
Women do see Mds more often but live longer than men.
Does anyone other than me think that some witchiness would be asset, maybe?
(Personally, I have seen men be just as evil as women - they just don't discuss to death - amongst themselves)
Mar 13, '03Unfortunately, I agree with most everyone else. The statement you made about Junior High School struck home with me. I KNEW this was familiar. I hated JR.High too. As much as I hate to say it, I think this is a problem directly related to being female, and I am not a good example of a female. Always got along better with the men and hate gossip. I would much rather discuss politics, cars, fishing, tools, computers, anything other than bad-mouthing someone. So I don't participate. I joke around a lot and tell funny stories. Been told I need to do stand up. My Childhood preacher once told a story of a woman who was beloved by all in the community. She was asked why that was and stated: "I just taste my words before they come out of my mouth. If they don't taste sweet, I swallow them." Always remembered that. I try to do that very thing and I change the subject( usually with some off the wall funny story from back home, I'm a redneck from Tennessee, so it's easy). Then I move on..
Mar 13, '03Yup, the cattiness goes on in any job, not just nursing. (I was a Realtor prior to starting pre-req's, you want to talk about back-stabbing and gossip)
All women are not catty and back-stabbing. I am not. I do like catrn10 does and just ignore, change the subject, use some humor, or walk away. I went to work to do my job. I just acted naive and ignorant about the gossip crap, and didn't get involved with it. After a while, people stopped spreading gossip around me, I guess I wasn't too fun to play with.
I also think women tend to talk things to death. (I'm speaking from my experience) They like to involve everybody in their problems and personal lives, most of it not appropriate on the job.
Mar 13, '03Originally posted by emily_mom
Then maybe not generalizing new nurses as "snot-nosed" would make me believe you.
Mar 13, '03Originally posted by OBNURSEHEATHER
Hmmm.... just wondering what the opposite of snot-nosed would be? Crusty?
Mar 13, '03People kid around about this, but it is sick and wrong to prey on the new. My mission at work is to provide excellent health care to patients and work as a team. When I was completely new, I noticed some people would take advantage of a situation with negativity and frustration. Believe me, I do a great job of being quiet and feeling like a fool when some people get all nervous and tense. It's like colateral damage. And I ain't even done anything :-(
Nursing school is a pit. There are no men instructors, and there were 6/85 men where I went.
Like a Marine has to walk the gaunlet after promotion, perhaps certain: nurses, students, health care workers figure you have to pass some kind of psychological attack, and then it's up to the local mob for you to be spared or killed. It's still kinda strange to me. If your in a situation where you DETECT you are being attacked, you have to "break the taboo" and call it.
It's sick and wrong to think a health care worker should have to be injured at work or school because of this stigma. I'm a great health care worker, and excellent future RN, because I DON'T engage in "catty" conversations, nor will I be prepared to attack back. My mind is engaged in providing care, see? I'm not the person who does well if picked on because thats how far removed I am from what it's about. Can't fault me for being the youngest in a family ill equiped to do battle emotionally. Let's all help each other and curtail our angry selfs to outside work. Please.