New Year, Norovirus, and Me

**VivaLasViejas**, ASN, RN

"I don't care about my new $200 shoes.......BLAAAARGH!"

Lord, I hate being sick. Especially THIS kind of sick. It's been four or five days (I've lost count) and I still feel like death warmed over, but I think I may be on the downside of this thing. Maybe. The thunder and lightning in my tummy have ceased; I've even been able to eat a little, although my "meals" would make a fashion model's plate look like a banquet. But I'm no longer certain of my immune system, which used to fight off the squirrels in the backyard, and now has betrayed me despite constant hand-washing, mask-wearing, and glove-donning. I am weakened and humbled.....and I still can't stay up for more than half a day without needing a three-hour nap.

Did I mention that I hate being sick?

There is perhaps nothing on earth that can bring a person to his/her knees faster than a dose of norovirus. From the hour on Thursday morning when the first symptoms struck with the force of a hurricane, to the time when I realized I'd gone most of the day without exploding from one end or the other, I pondered what weak vessels we humans really are. It takes a whole sneeze's worth of virus particles to give us a head cold; Norwalk requires a mere 20 particles to make us so ill that we find ourselves praying for death as our bodies reject everything we've even THOUGHT of eating for the past week.

Relief, such as it is, can only be found in sleep (preferably promethazine-enhanced). After the first few bouts of emesis---the second of which occurred on the shoulder of Interstate 5 between work and home---the Phenergan kicked in and I proceeded to sleep for about 18 of the next 24 hours. Somebody, my husband or son I suppose, woke me in the middle of the night to ask if I wanted to eat or drink something; I think I might have swatted at them and told them where to go and how to entertain themselves when they got there. But I don't remember for sure. I imagine they'll tell me when I'm well enough to hear about what a rhymes-with-witch I've been.

Finally, yesterday I dragged my sorry carcass upstairs to the land of the living, where the lights were too bright and the TV too loud, but where there were people and warmth and the computer. That tiny burst of something resembling energy didn't last long, but I managed a couple of posts here and on Facebook, where I let my friends know that I was alive, if not well. Then it was time to hit the hay again......I don't care how strong you think you are, this thing really wipes you out!

As I was drifting off to dreamland, I wondered how my residents were doing and whether anyone else had come down with it; on impulse I called the building and found out there were five new cases among the residents, as well as two more staff who were ill. It was enough to make my poor outraged stomach lurch anew as I thought of the paperwork I was facing when I got back to work......IF I ever got back.

Later, I watched the local news and was instantaneously outraged by a story on the "stomach flu" that's going around and why flu shots are ineffective against it. I wanted to throw my L.L. Bean slippers through the TV. How in the Sam Hill is the average layperson supposed to know what "flu" is---and isn't--- when they're getting this misinformation from newscasters who obviously haven't done their homework??!

Today, I'm marginally better, if nowhere near where I wanted to be by this time. I managed to get a piece of toast and a cup of coffee to stay down; tonight I may get even more adventurous and try some soup and crackers. Woo-hoo. The only good thing I have to say about any of this is that I've probably dropped a few pounds....there must be SOME reason my pajamas are hanging looser and my kid wants to know if I've lost more weight.

Yes, I've come to believe that the Norwalk virus is the great equalizer---it strikes both the rich and the poor, the old and the young, the strong and the frail---and it turns us all into shivering, quivering blobs of human Jell-O.

I'd write more, but I have this sudden and overwhelming need to seek a horizontal surface......preferably with soft blankets and a pet or two to keep these achy old bones warm. Stay well, my friends. zzzzzzzzzzzz

New Year, Norovirus, and Me

About VivaLasViejas, ASN, RN

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