This is my first post on this website ever. I have been reading posts, articles, and forums from this site for a while now since I started nursing school
. And now I just decided to join the community!
A little bit about myself: I graduated in May 2017. Studied for boards for about 2 months after graduation, and then took it and passed in July. I got a job offer as a staff RN, night shift, on a medsurg floor a month before I passed my boards. Now, I have been working this job for a little over 3 months.
But I am struggling. I have anxiety and I get a tremendous amount of stress the day before I have to work; all day that day and when I drive to work. When I have a two- or three-day streak, I am always so nervous on that first night. I figured that the reason for it is because I know I have to know everything about my new 4-5 patients, or get a new admission during shift change, or get patients that are agitated or very "needy." And I know that I will have to finish my charting later in the shift, well after everybody's sleeping or I have finished med passes, which i don't always finish within the scheduled timeframe. All of this is so frustrating to me. I get very stressed when I am running behind. And it gets worse when I know I am already behind and then something comes up that needs my attention and becomes priority. Then I have to drop everything!
I guess I didn't realize til now how dynamic nursing is, and with my personality type I am struggling with this very fact. I like routine; I like to know my patients. I hate the fact that anything can happen and I have to be ready for it! That makes me so nervous! My team on nights have been very nice and helpful. A few of them are very proactive of asking me if I need help or if they can do anything for me while I do something else. Like this one nurse offerred she could do chart checks for me while I had to set my attention on an urgent situation for one of my patients. They have been really awesome. But right now I feel so inadequate and dumb and don't know anything. I always have to ask questions.
Maybe someone here has gone through or is going through the same thing right now? I have been trying to reframe my mindset about my situation and the fact that nursing on the medsurg floor is so dynamic and can change in a snap. (Big BUT for me here) But right now I am struggling; there are days that I would just start crying and question why I did this to myself. Anybody have any word of encouragement? I need some words of enocuragement right now. Thank you!