Name that part. Words patients use for their own anatomy. - page 6

Ever searched in a patients' room for what you thought she said she needed to "watch her pocketbook" , she staring at you and you staring at her. Then finally saying, mam what color is your... Read More

  1. by   SouthernLPN2RN
    Had a pt call the office one day saying that her "woody cat" hurt. :chuckle
  2. by   tlhubbard
    Family from Kentucky referred to the vagina as "flap jack"

    Husband refers to a penis as: Purple headed warrior, One-eyed slobber bobber and Yogurt slinger

    Personally I call it "keep it on your side of the bed"
  3. by   THEsunnygurl84
    The most funniest term I have heard was when my grandmother-in-law called her front part "elizabeth" I started laughing right when she said it. I taught my kid sister to call hers "betsy".
  4. by   fotografe
    I think it would be appropriate to chart what the patient said as it would alert the next caregiver as to how she referred to her genitals.

    Quote from Aneroo
    hehehe... I was helping a fellow student chart the other day, when she asked me if this was ok... "Patient stated her 'cookie' (vaginal area) itched due to the soap..." Took all I had to keep from laughing! I told her that I didn't feel that was the best way to chart that. Even though it was her exact words, I looked at from this view...If I were in court, and I had charted that, what would the judge/jury think of me! We changed it and left of the "..." marks and put it as 'Patient complained of her genitals itching...
  5. by   cinnyluvscats
    I get a chuckle any time I hear a male patient take about his "prostrate" problems! Yeah, if you have serious problems with your "prostate", you could end up in a "prostrate" position!

    This is kind of along this topic, but when I was working OB, we had a woman who was getting ready to deliver. When we put her in the lithotomy position, we discovered a tatoo on her upper inner thigh that read "Ed's Meat". The really funny part was that the baby's father was NOT named Ed!!!

  6. by   dragonsfancy
    When I worked in this one particular nursing home around two years ago, I took care of a lady with rheumatoid arthritis. She couldn't really do much for herself in the way of personal hygiene due to her hands and arms hurting her, so whenever she was incontinent or if we were giving her a bed bath, she would look you dead in the eye and with all seriousness, exclaim:

    Girls, make sure you wash that moosie good, now, you hear?
  7. by   shopgal
    A friend of mine calls hers her "Lucy" and when I was younger, we were taught that it was your "do-do" whether you were male or female and so for awhile when I was little I thought that we were all the same because everyone had a "do-do" On Sex and the City, Charolotte calls hers her "Rebecca" and her husband calls his his "Schooner" or "John Thomas" I thought that was pretty funny. My husband calls his "Coach" :chuckle
  8. by   Kelly_the_Great
    I had a patient once that referred to her anus as a "butter-hole" and her vagina as a "tin plate." Makes ya wonder .?.?.?...weird
  9. by   daddygurl66
    Yesterday I was giving my pt a shower, and he told me make sure you get " Big John " real good..lol took me a min to figure out what he was talking about ..
  10. by   SouthernLPN2RN
    Quote from tlhubbard
    Personally I call it "keep it on your side of the bed"
    ROFLMBO!!!!
  11. by   hipab4hands
    Have had women refer to thier breasts as "the girls" or the "the twins".
  12. by   luvkitties
    I work in a long-term care facility, and we had a lady who was very "colorful". When I would put on gloves, she'd say "so, you're putting on your finger condoms?" She'd also ask outright "Are you a c*cksucker?" :chuckle She would also say that her p**** itched, talk about her past sex life, and ask us about ours! She has been gone for almost a year now...boy I sure do miss her! :chuckle :chuckle :chuckle
  13. by   Super RT
    We have always tried to teach our children to call body parts by their proper names. You wouldn't call your arm a ding-dong, right? So when my son was very small, 3ish, when we gave him a bath we would say things like I'm washing your arm, or I'm washing your penis. Well, somehow he missunderstood that word. When his grandmother was giving him a bath one evening, she washed a body part and asked him what it was. Elbow, fingers, etc. When she washed his penis, she asked him what part she was washing. He looked at her very seriously and said "that's my Peanuts"!

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