I am wondering if I have the wrong job or if this is nursing. I wanted to become a nurse because I love working with people (even difficult ones) and I want to help people. I love my actual job. I love my patients, even the difficult ones. But I am finding myself dreading to go into work. I helped out a nurse that was overwhelmed and a verbal warning for not following up on a pain medication. I have not just nursing notes and shift assessments to do, but I also have three other online "forms" to fill out on patients. One of them is tricky and the program likes to delete your entry. I forgot to check that it didnt delete and was actually there..... and of course it deleted instead of saving. I got written up for not completing the proper paperwork on my patients. I got a verbal warning because I got cold and put a jacket on and it covered my name badge.
I have a horrible night shift. A nurse went home sick, and one had called out leaving us short two nurses. I had three discharges, two admits and five patients that I only had "for a while" during one eight hour shift, I also gave meds to four patients that belonged to two other nurses because everyone was overwhelmed. I could care for the patients, that is not the problem, my problem is that i am now dreading answering questions about why I did or didnt do something on that day (paperwork related of course). I gave insulin that was well over an hour overdue to three patients that werent mine. I just feel a write up coming for late meds.
Is this nursing? Fearing my job over petty issues? Being afraid to help someone out because I could get written up for their lateness? Do I have the wrong job? (this is my first nursing job).