My Preceptor is making life miserable!! - page 3

Hello all, I recently started in a level 2b NICU and have been there for 4 shifts so far. My preceptor was rude to me right from the start and this has continued for every shift. I am not a new... Read More

  1. Visit  BMNurse85 profile page
    0
    Quote from HappyParamedicRN
    Thank you all for the advice. I emailed the educator a couple of hours ago and was told we could sit and talk about it... She also asked if I could talk to my preceptor about how I feel, but in my oppion, this person is not someone you can change and it will just set me up for failure.

    The problem is the educator is not availalbe tomorow and neither is the nurse manager, so its either call out sick tomrowo or work with a miserable person all day long. I was near tears yesterday and I am sure tomroow will be no different.

    Should I still go in? Just the thought makes my anxiety level climb!

    Another thing I forgot to mention is the other day we had a demise, 28 weeker didn't make it, even after 3 rounds of epi, and she never once bothered to ask if I was ok after it!
    Happy
    It seems like you are really stressed in your current situation. The responses so far seem to be as to what a professional would do so do your best to follow through. I do not have the slightest amount of experience since I am still in school, but one thing I do know is that jobs do not like it when you call in. It will give those who are giving you a hassle more of a reason to try to discredit what you are capable.
    I feel that for your benefit it would be best that you do go in. Good luck to you!
  2. Visit  headinsandRN profile page
    0
    dont give that nurse the satisfaction of having that much power over you.

    go in and be safe.
  3. Visit  Mulan profile page
    1
    Why not go in, get there a little early, and talk to your preceptor about it first thing, in a professional, non confrontational manner.

    Who knows? Maybe your day will be a 100% better.

    If not, at least you will have done what they expect of you, and then they can take it from there.

    Practice what you will say and how you will say it.

    Good luck.
    headinsandRN likes this.
  4. Visit  PostOpPrincess profile page
    0
    CHANGE PRECEPTORS STAT!

    Airways is THE most important thing in a baby--any neonate...

    Besides, yes, it's not the same as ED Adult, but belitting you isn't fair.

    Go get another preceptor!
  5. Visit  SnowboardLovinRN profile page
    0
    I suggest you do go in to work tomorrow. I know you are anxious, but you need to talk to your preceptor about how you are feeling. Then, if it doesnt work you have exhausted all available options before you go to the educator. If it does help then that would be great, and you would be building good rapport with that RN. Being proactive and trying to work out these issues with your preceptor will help to prove your worth as a team member to your manager. Practice what you want to say tonight. At worst you will have one more bad shift, but it could be well worth it in the end.

    Good luck! Update us tomorrow on your decision
  6. Visit  wooh profile page
    1
    NICU is a whole different world from any kind of nursing. I do peds, most of my patient population is ex-preemies, and I'd still be lost doing NICU. I'd say 90% of our patient care policies have NICU exceptions, because EVERYTHING is different in NICU.
    You're not a new nurse, you're worse than a new nurse. New grads are blank slates, you can mold them. On any unit, nurses changing specialties have trouble. And their preceptors have trouble. It's tough to balance figuring out what a new to the specialty person knows, and doesn't know, and making sure to fill them in on all the things they don't know without being condescending.
    That said, you definitely got off on the wrong foot. The first thing you learn when you start any job is what time to get there. "Nobody told me" is not a good excuse. If you were back in the ER and someone showed up for their 3pm start time at 5pm because "Nobody told me," well, I can't imagine that would go over well with you. Not to mention, first day, get there early!
    You're going into this meeting all about, "She won't change." Well, probably true. But are you willing to change? You need to look back across these last few days and instead of focusing on what she should do differently, you need to start thinking about what YOU should do differently. Otherwise, you're likely to just end up with another preceptor "making your life miserable."
    Pepper The Cat likes this.
  7. Visit  nursel56 profile page
    0
    What is different about this from many preceptors from **** stories is that this lady volunteered for the job - so we know she doesn't perceive herself as others perceive her unless she is plainly sadistic.

    I have a co-worker who talks loudly and brusquely and a "pat on the arm" from her almost has me flying across the room and smacking the wall! I've told her to cut it out now so many times but it doesn't stick and she really isn't a nasty person. Don't know if this applies at all to your preceptor but thought I'd throw it out there anyway FWIW. I think it will all work out and it's a great lesson to everyone that you are tackling this issue so soon as far too many people just seethe and smolder their way through while wasting precious learning time. Best wishes!
  8. Visit  Katie5 profile page
    1
    Your first day on the job and you come in exactly at 7am?One would think you would want to show up early and orient yourself. No one needs to tell you that.

    Your probably set the tone of this preceptorship. When you say yelling, how exactly do you mean, "in a loud raised voice or curt tones."

    Day 3- You "want" to call in sick.

    Day 4- You already want to speak with a nurse educator? Please reassess the situation through unbiased eyes.
    Ashersmamma likes this.
  9. Visit  Katie5 profile page
    0
    Quote from lalalalexi
    Just a suggestion here but a few weeks ago we had a new nurse orienting on my unit. He had two different preceptors (switching back and forth) and after a few shifts he told one of two "I appreciate all you've done to train me so far, and I've learned a lot but I just think our "styles" and ways of doing things are very different" and then he told her he would prefer to finish off his orientation with the other preceptor. He then talked to the floor nurse educator (who sets up precepting schedules) about it, and his schedule was changed. The only person who this upset was the preceptor who he "fired" (and myself and others don't blame him at all because this nurse is very controlling and bossy). I thought he went about it in a really respectful manner though, that still ensured he got a good orientation and took care of himself as a nurse and a person. Don't call in sick, just be assertive and ask for what you want (a different preceptor).

    .
    How like a man to be upfront about it.Kudos to him, such maturity.

    The OP should attempt to reason with her preceptor BEFORE involving the nurse educator.No need to jump the gun.
  10. Visit  MJB2010 profile page
    0
    Hugs to you, I feel your pain.I dont know if you saw my thread, but my preceptor is doing the same. I cant take much more. I asked for a new preceptor, I did not say why, I just asked and the director said ok. I am guessing she knew what was going on. Yours may also know how your preceptor is and how she treats people, she might not be surprised if you ask for someone new. Best of luck to you, I am DREADING going back to work. I am now nervous I will end up with one of witch preceptors cronies.
  11. Visit  AnnieOaklyRN profile page
    0
    Quote from MJB2010
    Hugs to you, I feel your pain.I dont know if you saw my thread, but my preceptor is doing the same. I cant take much more. I asked for a new preceptor, I did not say why, I just asked and the director said ok. I am guessing she knew what was going on. Yours may also know how your preceptor is and how she treats people, she might not be surprised if you ask for someone new. Best of luck to you, I am DREADING going back to work. I am now nervous I will end up with one of witch preceptors cronies.

    I am glad people can understand. Hugs to you as well, sometimes like others have said, learning and teaching styles just do not mesh. You get more bees with honey though!
  12. Visit  AnnieOaklyRN profile page
    1
    Well I had to make a tough decision today, I decided to resign more so for financial reasons. Unfortunatly they only have 32 hours for me and I was hoping it would be enough financially, but its just not, so I went back to my office wheels full time whre I make almost double with more hours available.

    I am going to throw my hat in with regards to nursing for a while...

    THanks everyone for the advice and the kind words.

    Happy
    nursel56 likes this.


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