Lesson learned

Nurses General Nursing

Published

I have lost respect for a provider that I have known for many years. I had always trusted this provider's judgment and care. I of course have heard some rumors saying less than stellar things, but who hasn't had a disgruntled patient or two? This provider has always provided excellent care for my family (when we were well at least). I have learned my lesson. My spouse is dealing with some significant, new onset, rare, and disabling eye/brain issues. This provider has failed us at every step of his treatment thus far, and their bedside manner has been appalling at best.

I have now become one of those disgruntled patients who have seen the light. Sadly I feel like I have failed my husband and delayed treatment because I trusted someone I shouldn't have. This has been a reminder to me that sometimes where this is smoke, there is fire

Specializes in Critical Care; Cardiac; Professional Development.

Oh Emmylou, I am so sorry to hear of your husband's illness and your internal anguish. You said it yourself...you trusted this provider. The onus is on them, not you. My heart hurts for you.

Saddened to hear of your spouse's illness. It's difficult to be a nurse when a loved one is ill.

The caregiver/ spouse roles become confusing.

YOU DID NOT FAIL... the provider did.

Specializes in Pediatrics, Emergency, Trauma.
Saddened to hear of your spouse's illness. It's difficult to be a nurse when a loved one is ill.

The caregiver/ spouse roles become confusing.

YOU DID NOT FAIL... the provider did.

THIS.

Sending positive vibes for a competent provider to assist in your husbands health and for your husband to have a manageable outcome.

xoemmylouox I'm sorry to hear this. Do NOT blame yourself. This is not your fault.

When you leave the practice make sure they know exactly why.

Best wishes.

Specializes in Critical Care, Education.

So sorry you're faced with this.

In my own experience, I have grown to really value the opinions of the behind-the-scenes folks (case manager, quality director, etc) when it comes to physician performance & outcomes. They 'see' the stuff that no one else does.

Based on that, I "interviewed" docs prior to my surgery a while back (sailed through - excellent outcome) and went with the one that was not at all upset when I asked him for his performance data rather than choosing Dr GQ McCharm-guy or Dr Luxurious office with espresso machine.

Specializes in Case mgmt., rehab, (CRRN), LTC & psych.

I am so sorry for the health issues your husband is currently experiencing. My thoughts will remain with you and your family with hopes for the most optimal outcome.

Specializes in ER.

It's so easy to blame ourselves in 20/20 hindsight. I'm sorry you're going through this, but it's NOT your fault! Don't carry that guilt!

Thank to for all of the kind responses. It is very frustrating to see the failures and know how things should be going. I understand some blips, things happen, but we are past that. I just hope we can find a sense of peace with what faces us.

Specializes in Critical Care.

Your spouse needs a specialist not a family provider. Unfortunately rare diagnoses are not the first thing Dr's think of. They do a differential diagnosis and start with the most common and likely cause and then a rare diagnosis is not caught right away. I remember looking at the differential diagnosis of left arm pain, from cardiac to esophageal, musculoskeletal to even cancer. Yes it can be a sign of lung cancer. How many providers think left arm pain is lung cancer?

I hope you now have a good specialist that can help your spouse get the right treatment.

Specializes in HH, Peds, Rehab, Clinical.

I hope you are seeing good SPECIALISTS for your husbands needs. I work in ophthalmology, highly specialized in retina. My MD is so thourough that the other day I sent a man to ER b/c he couldn't pee, having prostate issues. He has Dx a bulging aortic anueryism, a couple of brain tumors, colon cancer---and I've been there 9 months. I worked up a woman a couple of months ago, she said she couldn't get her glaucoma drops in b/c her arm hurt too much to do it. A little investigation, a send on to internal medicine and she was admitted for cellulitis!

Just today, he Dx this: Acute Posterior Multifocal Placoid Pigment Epitheliopathy - EyeWiki He has seen two cases since residency. This was number two.

I am truly amazed at the things your eyes can tell you!

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