Is there nursing after 50? - page 11

Does being 50+ mean I have to quit nursing and go into poverty for the rest of my life or am I supossed to kill myself?... Read More

  1. by   Malt123
    Quote from rn/writer
    Gotta love Rosanne Roseannadanna. :chuckle

    Then there John Lennon's take on it--Life is what happens when you're making other plans.

    Or Steve Miller's--roll with it, baby. :roll

    Hey Malt123, has anything good happened to you. What are you thankful for? There must be something that has gone your way and made you smile? Tell us about the g-kids for starters.

    Miranda F.
    I have a 3 year old grandaughter and the grandson is almost 8. daughter is not well so the kids are here a lot. I have a bed room just for them. the stress that I have been going through plus worrying about my daughter and the money issues gets to be a bit much at times. this stupid hospital here over dosed my daughter and almost killed her awhile back then they neglected the fact that the infection my grandaughter had was resistant to the ABT and she almost went septic. otherwise everything is fine. My job would have helped everyone in this family.
  2. by   stevierae
    Quote from Malt123
    I have a 3 year old grandaughter and the grandson is almost 8. daughter is not well so the kids are here a lot. I have a bed room just for them. the stress that I have been going through plus worrying about my daughter and the money issues gets to be a bit much at times. this stupid hospital here over dosed my daughter and almost killed her awhile back then they neglected the fact that the infection my grandaughter had was resistant to the ABT and she almost went septic. otherwise everything is fine. My job would have helped everyone in this family.
    You still haven't answered: Is there ANYTHING that makes you happy? Anything that makes you smile? Anything that gives you pleasure? My goodness, ain't it grand to just be ALIVE? I have been reviewing oncology patients' charts over the past few days--MY GOODNESS! What they'd give for just one more day on earth!

    Not our business, of course, but why can't adult daughter be responsible for he OWN kids, rather than putting the additional burden on you?
    Last edit by stevierae on Jan 15, '05
  3. by   Malt123
    Quote from stevierae
    You still haven't answered: Is there ANYTHING that makes you happy? Anything that makes you smile? Anything that gives you pleasure? My goodness, ain't it grand to just be ALIVE? I have been reviewing oncology patinet's charts over the past few days--MY GOODNESS! What they'd give for just one more day on earth!

    Not our business, of course, but why can't adult daughter be responsible for he OWN kids, rather than putting the additional burden on you?
    she is trying
  4. by   rn/writer
    Quote from Malt123
    I have a 3 year old grandaughter and the grandson is almost 8. daughter is not well so the kids are here a lot. I have a bed room just for them. the stress that I have been going through plus worrying about my daughter and the money issues gets to be a bit much at times. this stupid hospital here over dosed my daughter and almost killed her awhile back then they neglected the fact that the infection my grandaughter had was resistant to the ABT and she almost went septic. otherwise everything is fine. My job would have helped everyone in this family.
    I'm sorry your daughter is not well. How good of you to make a special place for the kids. What are their names?

    I hope you can tell that some of us have found ourselves caring about you and your stressful situation. And I hope that concern will give you reason to consider what I'm about to say.

    A few years back, my normally kind and generous husband started turning sour on me. We've weathered a lot of storms over the years and always managed to keep our sanity (though some would debate that), but this time around, he was down in the mouth about everything and it was really starting to take a toll on our relationship.

    It took a while to figure out what was going wrong but, boy, did the information make a difference. The breakthrough came when a speed demon cut him off on the freeway and we almost had an accident. He was furious and with that anger piled on top of the mad he had going most of the time now, he was a lunatic. I was afraid HE was going to hurt us. I begged him to get off the freeway and we pulled over and talked about what in the world was going on. At first, he only snapped at me. "What am I supposed to do when some jerk nearly slams into us, thank him?" He swore a bit and shot me venomous looks. If I'd known him less well, I'd have been afraid.

    After he calmed down some, I asked him why the incident had made him sooo angry. He started up again and God just gave me a flash of insight. I said, "That guy really scared you, didn't he." You'd think I flipped a switch. He went from enraged to vulnerable instantly. His eyes teared up and he nodded. We talked more and the tension evaporated.

    Then I said something I thought was both obvious and innocent. "He [the bad driver] didn't mean anything personal. He wasn't even thinking about you." He looked at me like I'd said pixies were dancing on the hood of our car.

    We continued our conversation in a restaurant and here's what we put together. He'd been going through some garbage at work. One of the higher ups was gunning for him. Unfairly. And that was the key.

    My husband has survived an awful lot of terrible things. The worst happened when he was twelve and both parents and one set of grandparents were killed in a car accident. Eight kids (from 16 years old down to eighteen months) were orphaned and the two extended families were thrown into chaos. The kids were parcelled out among aunts and uncles. He was the only one who went somewhere without a sibling. In the space of a couple of weeks, he lost not only his parents and grandparents but also his home, regular contact with his siblings, his school, his neighborhood, his dog, most of his toys, his bike, in other words, everything that makes up the life of a kid. He got to take a suitcase of clothes and whatever else he could fit into one bag. He spent the next year crying himself to sleep every night. Alone, because the aunt who took him in said seeing him cry made her think of her sister (his mother) and she couldn't stand the pain.

    We met our first year of college and married young (18 and 19) I'm sure because he had such a hunger for a family. He told me about the horrible things he'd been through but then we moved on and got busy with six kids, foster kids, and a million other things.

    This situation at work had tapped into that long buried reservoir of pain. The loss itself, but also the unfathomable unfairness of it all. He was just a little kid, getting in trouble now and then, but mostly just minding his own business and, WHOMP, his whole world caved in. As an adult, he understood that nothing that happened that horrible night was his fault, but there was still a terrified boy inside him railing at the injustice of losing nearly everything he valued.

    We kept talking through this stuff over the next few weeks. I guess he let himself look at things he'd pushed down for decades and let himself feel whatever he truly felt. As a man, he was finally able to handle what the boy could not.

    He said he found himself letting go of the stuff at work. The situation still existed but it didn't have the power to rip his guts out over the injustice of it all. He was able to look at the supervisor without the massive tension and even though the guy kept after him, the disagreements had a different tone now. The supervisor didn't really change his behavior but the venom seemed to have gone out of the snake.

    Three things are important here. One was the entire priciple of unfinished business. Nobody sets out to have a chip on their shoulder, so if it seems like thay might have one, maybe whatever is happening now hits an already inflamed nerve.

    The second thing that helped my husband was realizing that much of his anger was a "strong" front to cover terror and grief. We have been able to use this knowledge time and again with him and with various hotheads in our family to get past the rage to the real stuff. It's had amazing benefits.

    The third gift we took out of that day was the idea that, even though slings and arrows might look personal, they rarely are. Most assaults are about the perpetrator. Any target will do.

    I say all of that to ask you to think on a deeper level about what your life might be saying to you. Are you wired and in pain from unfinished business? With all of the traumatic things that have happened to you, sure seems like that could be a possibility.

    Is your anger covering more vulnerable emotions that really need attention ?

    What would help you to bind up your wounds and find the peace you're seeking? Because, really, this is AND isn't about the job.

    I wish I could rub your shoulders and make you some hot cocoa and give you a big hug. I'm doing it in spirit anyway. (((()))))

    Miranda F.
  5. by   Malt123
    Quote from rn/writer
    I'm sorry your daughter is not well. How good of you to make a special place for the kids. What are their names?

    I hope you can tell that some of us have found ourselves caring about you and your stressful situation. And I hope that concern will give you reason to consider what I'm about to say.

    A few years back, my normally kind and generous husband started turning sour on me. We've weathered a lot of storms over the years and always managed to keep our sanity (though some would debate that), but this time around, he was down in the mouth about everything and it was really starting to take a toll on our relationship.

    It took a while to figure out what was going wrong but, boy, did the information make a difference. The breakthrough came when a speed demon cut him off on the freeway and we almost had an accident. He was furious and with that anger piled on top of the mad he had going most of the time now, he was a lunatic. I was afraid HE was going to hurt us. I begged him to get off the freeway and we pulled over and talked about what in the world was going on. At first, he only snapped at me. "What am I supposed to do when some jerk nearly slams into us, thank him?" He swore a bit and shot me venomous looks. If I'd known him less well, I'd have been afraid.

    After he calmed down some, I asked him why the incident had made him sooo angry. He started up again and God just gave me a flash of insight. I said, "That guy really scared you, didn't he." You'd think I flipped a switch. He went from enraged to vulnerable instantly. His eyes teared up and he nodded. We talked more and the tension evaporated.

    Then I said something I thought was both obvious and innocent. "He [the bad driver] didn't mean anything personal. He wasn't even thinking about you." He looked at me like I'd said pixies were dancing on the hood of our car.

    We continued our conversation in a restaurant and here's what we put together. He'd been going through some garbage at work. One of the higher ups was gunning for him. Unfairly. And that was the key.

    My husband has survived an awful lot of terrible things. The worst happened when he was twelve and both parents and one set of grandparents were killed in a car accident. Eight kids (from 16 years old down to eighteen months) were orphaned and the two extended families were thrown into chaos. The kids were parcelled out among aunts and uncles. He was the only one who went somewhere without a sibling. In the space of a couple of weeks, he lost not only his parents and grandparents but also his home, regular contact with his siblings, his school, his neighborhood, his dog, most of his toys, his bike, in other words, everything that makes up the life of a kid. He got to take a suitcase of clothes and whatever else he could fit into one bag. He spent the next year crying himself to sleep every night. Alone, because the aunt who took him in said seeing him cry made her think of her sister (his mother) and she couldn't stand the pain.

    We met our first year of college and married young (18 and 19) I'm sure because he had such a hunger for a family. He told me about the horrible things he'd been through but then we moved on and got busy with six kids, foster kids, and a million other things.

    This situation at work had tapped into that long buried reservoir of pain. The loss itself, but also the unfathomable unfairness of it all. He was just a little kid, getting in trouble now and then, but mostly just minding his own business and, WHOMP, his whole world caved in. As an adult, he understood that nothing that happened that horrible night was his fault, but there was still a terrified boy inside him railing at the injustice of losing nearly everything he valued.

    We kept talking through this stuff over the next few weeks. I guess he let himself look at things he'd pushed down for decades and let himself feel whatever he truly felt. As a man, he was finally able to handle what the boy could not.

    He said he found himself letting go of the stuff at work. The situation still existed but it didn't have the power to rip his guts out over the injustice of it all. He was able to look at the supervisor without the massive tension and even though the guy kept after him, the disagreements had a different tone now. The supervisor didn't really change his behavior but the venom seemed to have gone out of the snake.

    Three things are important here. One was the entire priciple of unfinished business. Nobody sets out to have a chip on their shoulder, so if it seems like thay might have one, maybe whatever is happening now hits an already inflamed nerve.

    The second thing that helped my husband was realizing that much of his anger was a "strong" front to cover terror and grief. We have been able to use this knowledge time and again with him and with various hotheads in our family to get past the rage to the real stuff. It's had amazing benefits.

    The third gift we took out of that day was the idea that, even though slings and arrows might look personal, they rarely are. Most assaults are about the perpetrator. Any target will do.

    I say all of that to ask you to think on a deeper level about what your life might be saying to you. Are you wired and in pain from unfinished business? With all of the traumatic things that have happened to you, sure seems like that could be a possibility.

    Is your anger covering more vulnerable emotions that really need attention ?

    What would help you to bind up your wounds and find the peace you're seeking? Because, really, this is AND isn't about the job.

    I wish I could rub your shoulders and make you some hot cocoa and give you a big hug. I'm doing it in spirit anyway. (((()))))

    Miranda F.
    have you seen Harry Potter, I was Harry Potter but I was treated a lot worse. I'm not talking about the wizard stuff. but I have dealt with all that. a girl Harry Potter of course. I appreciate what you have said.
  6. by   Malt123
    Quote from rn/writer
    I'm sorry your daughter is not well. How good of you to make a special place for the kids. What are their names?

    I hope you can tell that some of us have found ourselves caring about you and your stressful situation. And I hope that concern will give you reason to consider what I'm about to say.

    A few years back, my normally kind and generous husband started turning sour on me. We've weathered a lot of storms over the years and always managed to keep our sanity (though some would debate that), but this time around, he was down in the mouth about everything and it was really starting to take a toll on our relationship.

    It took a while to figure out what was going wrong but, boy, did the information make a difference. The breakthrough came when a speed demon cut him off on the freeway and we almost had an accident. He was furious and with that anger piled on top of the mad he had going most of the time now, he was a lunatic. I was afraid HE was going to hurt us. I begged him to get off the freeway and we pulled over and talked about what in the world was going on. At first, he only snapped at me. "What am I supposed to do when some jerk nearly slams into us, thank him?" He swore a bit and shot me venomous looks. If I'd known him less well, I'd have been afraid.

    After he calmed down some, I asked him why the incident had made him sooo angry. He started up again and God just gave me a flash of insight. I said, "That guy really scared you, didn't he." You'd think I flipped a switch. He went from enraged to vulnerable instantly. His eyes teared up and he nodded. We talked more and the tension evaporated.

    Then I said something I thought was both obvious and innocent. "He [the bad driver] didn't mean anything personal. He wasn't even thinking about you." He looked at me like I'd said pixies were dancing on the hood of our car.

    We continued our conversation in a restaurant and here's what we put together. He'd been going through some garbage at work. One of the higher ups was gunning for him. Unfairly. And that was the key.

    My husband has survived an awful lot of terrible things. The worst happened when he was twelve and both parents and one set of grandparents were killed in a car accident. Eight kids (from 16 years old down to eighteen months) were orphaned and the two extended families were thrown into chaos. The kids were parcelled out among aunts and uncles. He was the only one who went somewhere without a sibling. In the space of a couple of weeks, he lost not only his parents and grandparents but also his home, regular contact with his siblings, his school, his neighborhood, his dog, most of his toys, his bike, in other words, everything that makes up the life of a kid. He got to take a suitcase of clothes and whatever else he could fit into one bag. He spent the next year crying himself to sleep every night. Alone, because the aunt who took him in said seeing him cry made her think of her sister (his mother) and she couldn't stand the pain.

    We met our first year of college and married young (18 and 19) I'm sure because he had such a hunger for a family. He told me about the horrible things he'd been through but then we moved on and got busy with six kids, foster kids, and a million other things.

    This situation at work had tapped into that long buried reservoir of pain. The loss itself, but also the unfathomable unfairness of it all. He was just a little kid, getting in trouble now and then, but mostly just minding his own business and, WHOMP, his whole world caved in. As an adult, he understood that nothing that happened that horrible night was his fault, but there was still a terrified boy inside him railing at the injustice of losing nearly everything he valued.

    We kept talking through this stuff over the next few weeks. I guess he let himself look at things he'd pushed down for decades and let himself feel whatever he truly felt. As a man, he was finally able to handle what the boy could not.

    He said he found himself letting go of the stuff at work. The situation still existed but it didn't have the power to rip his guts out over the injustice of it all. He was able to look at the supervisor without the massive tension and even though the guy kept after him, the disagreements had a different tone now. The supervisor didn't really change his behavior but the venom seemed to have gone out of the snake.

    Three things are important here. One was the entire priciple of unfinished business. Nobody sets out to have a chip on their shoulder, so if it seems like thay might have one, maybe whatever is happening now hits an already inflamed nerve.

    The second thing that helped my husband was realizing that much of his anger was a "strong" front to cover terror and grief. We have been able to use this knowledge time and again with him and with various hotheads in our family to get past the rage to the real stuff. It's had amazing benefits.

    The third gift we took out of that day was the idea that, even though slings and arrows might look personal, they rarely are. Most assaults are about the perpetrator. Any target will do.

    I say all of that to ask you to think on a deeper level about what your life might be saying to you. Are you wired and in pain from unfinished business? With all of the traumatic things that have happened to you, sure seems like that could be a possibility.

    Is your anger covering more vulnerable emotions that really need attention ?

    What would help you to bind up your wounds and find the peace you're seeking? Because, really, this is AND isn't about the job.

    I wish I could rub your shoulders and make you some hot cocoa and give you a big hug. I'm doing it in spirit anyway. (((()))))

    Miranda F.
    this really has nothing to do with the fact that my last job was horrible and they raked me over the coals and I now may not be able to support myself and why. just because something happened when I was a child does not mean that every time I get upset or angry it has anything to do with that. people do get angry and sometimes no matter what they do there are no answers. and yes I would like to believe in the fantacies also and pretend that this is all my fault because if it were my fault I would be able to do something about it, but since the blame isn't just with me and as you well know you can only change youself and I changed due to circumstances and now people don't like that either. so it leaves me with nothing and I refuse to end up living under a bridge in Wisconsin or anywhere for that matter. and if there is any one on this site that thinks that is ok you are sick.
  7. by   VivaLasViejas
    Wow.......how ungracious. This poster poured out her heart to you in the hope that what she learned from her experience might help you get through yours........it wasn't necessary to be nasty.

    I'm sorry your life is going to hell in the proverbial bushel basket, but if this is your attitude toward those who are trying to help, maybe there's more to this story than we've heard here. :stone
  8. by   Malt123
    Quote from mjlrn97
    Wow.......how ungracious. This poster poured out her heart to you in the hope that what she learned from her experience might help you get through yours........it wasn't necessary to be nasty.

    I'm sorry your life is going to hell in the proverbial bushel basket, but if this is your attitude toward those who are trying to help, maybe there's more to this story than we've heard here. :stone
    sorry it wasn't meant like that, I am just tired of people telling me it's my fault, and that I should look at myself, I have done that before anyone ever said anything. there is always more to a story and I cannot talk about it on an open thread. I just don't think people understand and they can't without knowing everything and I apologize for that and I hope that people can understand the fact that I am having a very difficult time right now and I really don't think it is going to get anybetter. so I am giving a general apology for any time that I may sound "ungracious" as I do not have a lot of time left and really was hoping for some ideas that I haven't already thought of. Some one was using my nursing License, they tried to charge something in my name, my life was threatened and I think I was being used unknowingly as a pawn. if this sounds crazy try living it, alone and you can't get any kind of help to put a stop to it, it just goes on and on. Simply because I don't know who the hell is doing it. My brother told me "they are getting every one around you" who they are I don't know. but whatever they are doing it sure has cost me my friends and family. I probably shouldn't even be saying this on here.
  9. by   letina
    Quote from Malt123
    this really has nothing to do with the fact that my last job was horrible and they raked me over the coals and I now may not be able to support myself and why. just because something happened when I was a child does not mean that every time I get upset or angry it has anything to do with that. people do get angry and sometimes no matter what they do there are no answers. and yes I would like to believe in the fantacies also and pretend that this is all my fault because if it were my fault I would be able to do something about it, but since the blame isn't just with me and as you well know you can only change youself and I changed due to circumstances and now people don't like that either. so it leaves me with nothing and I refuse to end up living under a bridge in Wisconsin or anywhere for that matter. and if there is any one on this site that thinks that is ok you are sick.
    do you want support and empathy from your fellow professionals or not?
    YOU posted this thread looking for advice and when it is given in good spirit, you seem to throw it back in their faces, like you're telling them to go to he**
    :angryfire
  10. by   stevierae
    Quote from mjlrn97
    Wow.......how ungracious. This poster poured out her heart to you in the hope that what she learned from her experience might help you get through yours........it wasn't necessary to be nasty.

    I'm sorry your life is going to hell in the proverbial bushel basket, but if this is your attitude toward those who are trying to help, maybe there's more to this story than we've heard here. :stone
    No kidding!!! Miranda's story and her suggestions to you were so empathetic; so insightful---and I did not hear her saying ANYTHING was "your fault--" what I heard her saying is that people--most people--probably ALL people--have unfinished business, perhaps from childhood, that can surface suddenly as adults and, if not worked through, can impede their relationships with other people and, indeed, their very progression through life.

    She even told you she found herself caring for you and wished she could be there to make you some hot cocoa and let you talk.

    We have given you a sounding board and many, many suggestions, but you seem unwilling to follow up on even one of them--if you did, you would not be able to be the victim anymore.

    Some people live in a constant mode of drama and crisis, largely of their own doing. When those people vent about their continuum of drama and crisis, their listeners try to help them work through a productive solution--only to hear a series of "Yes, buts" and "It's not my fault." They are ALWAYS the victims. EVERYBODY is out to get them.

    It seems to me that you like playing the victim and perpetuating a "poor pitiful me" mode. My goodness, what is it you'd like someone here to do--tell you, yes, it sounds like your life is just one big piece of s*** and you might as well go throw yourself off a bridge?

    I think you really need to get off your a** and DO something--ANYTHING--to improve your situation. You don't have a car? Use the bus. If you are unemployed, apply for public assistance to tide you over, and go to the unemployment office or library, use their free resources, and FIND a job or get job retraining.

    If you are disabled, you can get a free or reduced price bus pass. If, indeed, you are disabled, you can get voc rehab or take various free classes through the state. Learn to type faster or upgrade your computer skills. Work on your spelling, grammar, punctuation & sentence structure--you tend to write run-on sentences without punctuation. Just that one small step will make you more marketable. Take a receptionist job or something, for heaven's sake!

    You've already said that nobody wants to hire you as a nurse. Well, then, unfortunately you just might not be able to WORK as a nurse. The bills still need to be paid--what are you going to do, just let day by day pass while you lament the fact that no one wants to hire you? MOVE ON!!! Do something else to keep a roof over your head, food on the table and the utilities on.

    It's commendable that you are taking care of your grandchildren, but your daughter, as their mother, is the one responsible for them. Why are you enabling her in NOT taking responsibility? Does she also have "issues" that prevent her from getting a job and moving forward in life? How is she "trying" to deal with them and better her own life, and her childrens'? Don't you realize that you are allowing HER to take control of YOUR life?

    The whole bunch of you ARE going to be under a bridge, unfortunately, pretty soon, if SOMEONE doesn't face reality and realize that bills don't get paid by wishing and hoping for a job in a profession in which no one, apparently, wants you--regardless of whose "fault" that is.

    I, too, think there is a lot more to your story than you have shared with us.

    I am also alarmed that you sound, in addition to being depressed, more than a little paranoid. Not only are YOU a victim, but the local hospital apparently tried to kill BOTH your daughter AND your granddaughter, to hear you tell it. We have all suggested that you get yourself to a doctor--perhaps the county mental health clinic--and get some help!!!! Why have you not done this?

    Somebody is using your nursing license? How is that even possible? Did you lose it, or loan it out, or share the number with someone, or what? Did you let yur state board know, so that they can alert hospitals, etc. that this license is being used by someone not authorized to use it? In any hospital in which I have ever worked, every employee has to wear a picture ID. If you have heard that someone is using your name and practicing nursing using your license, that person should be easy enough to run down--she has a picture ID with YOUR NAME on it!!

    Is she also using your social security number? If not, how is she getting PAID for nursing services rendered?

    This is getting really weird. In fact, it's getting bizarre. I am actually starting to wonder if we are being "had" here.
    Last edit by stevierae on Jan 16, '05
  11. by   letina
    stevierae, I am with you here. We are either being "had" or we have a very sick person here. In her last post she says she doesn't have a lot of time left, this is worrying.
  12. by   Malt123
    Quote from stevierae
    No kidding!!! Miranda's story and her suggestions to you were so empathetic; so insightful---and I did not hear her saying ANYTHING was "your fault--" what I heard her saying is that people--most people--probably ALL people--have unfinished business, perhaps from childhood, that can surface suddenly as adults and, if not worked through, can impede their relationships with other people and, indeed, their very progression through life.

    She even told you she found herself caring for you and wished she could be there to make you some hot cocoa and let you talk.

    We have given you a sounding board and many, many suggestions, but you seem unwilling to follow up on even one of them--if you did, you would not be able to be the victim anymore.

    Some people live in a constant mode of drama and crisis, largely of their own doing. When those people vent about their continuum of drama and crisis, their listeners try to help them work through a productive solution--only to hear a series of "Yes, buts" and "It's not my fault." They are ALWAYS the victims. EVERYBODY is out to get them.

    It seems to me that you like playing the victim and perpetuating a "poor pitiful me" mode. My goodness, what is it you'd like someone here to do--tell you, yes, it sounds like your life is just one big piece of s*** and you might as well go throw yourself off a bridge?

    I think you really need to get off your a** and DO something--ANYTHING--to improve your situation. You don't have a car? Use the bus. If you are unemployed, apply for public assistance to tide you over, and go to the unemployment office or library, use their free resources, and FIND a job or get job retraining.

    If you are disabled, you can get a free or reduced price bus pass. If, indeed, you are disabled, you can get voc rehab or take various free classes through the state. Learn to type faster or upgrade your computer skills. Work on your spelling, grammar, punctuation & sentence structure--you tend to write run-on sentences without punctuation. Just that one small step will make you more marketable. Take a receptionist job or something, for heaven's sake!

    You've already said that nobody wants to hire you as a nurse. Well, then, unfortunately you just might not be able to WORK as a nurse. The bills still need to be paid--what are you going to do, just let day by day pass while you lament the fact that no one wants to hire you? MOVE ON!!! Do something else to keep a roof over your head, food on the table and the utilities on.

    It's commendable that you are taking care of your grandchildren, but your daughter, as their mother, is the one responsible for them. Why are you enabling her in NOT taking responsibility? Does she also have "issues" that prevent her from getting a job and moving forward in life? How is she "trying" to deal with them and better her own life, and her childrens'? Don't you realize that you are allowing HER to take control of YOUR life?

    The whole bunch of you ARE going to be under a bridge, unfortunately, pretty soon, if SOMEONE doesn't face reality and realize that bills don't get paid by wishing and hoping for a job in a profession in which no one, apparently, wants you--regardless of whose "fault" that is.

    I, too, think there is a lot more to your story than you have shared with us.

    I am also alarmed that you sound, in addition to being depressed, more than a little paranoid. Not only are YOU a victim, but the local hospital apparently tried to kill BOTH your daughter AND your granddaughter, to hear you tell it. We have all suggested that you get yourself to a doctor--perhaps the county mental health clinic--and get some help!!!! Why have you not done this?

    Somebody is using your nursing license? How is that even possible? Did you lose it, or loan it out, or share the number with someone, or what? Did you let yur state board know, so that they can alert hospitals, etc. that this license is being used by someone not authorized to use it? In any hospital in which I have ever worked, every employee has to wear a picture ID. If you have heard that someone is using your name and practicing nursing using your license, that person should be easy enough to run down--she has a picture ID with YOUR NAME on it!!

    Is she also using your social security number? If not, how is she getting PAID for nursing services rendered?

    This is getting really weird. In fact, it's getting bizarre. I am actually starting to wonder if we are being "had" here.
    I thought I apologized for the misunderstanding. and I think they are using the license for a business. and yes years ago there was more money reported on my social security and yes I told them about it. I have a compact state license. there are about 10 or so states that they would be able to go work at. as far as my license goes the number can be gotten on the internet if you know the name. and none of this is made up so I am sorry that you feel had. try living through some of this. there are no buses in this town not even the greyhound and one doesn't come any closer than 50 miles near here. what a society, when you get older or sick that is also blamed on you. are you insinuating that I am lying. and that did happen to my daughter and grandaughter, I don't believe that I said they were trying to kill her. maybe the ambulance bill would convince you when I had to send her to the hospital for the over dose or the police report. and just maybe this all is just too much for you to comprehend and I do apologize for that.
  13. by   Malt123
    I am sorry if I made any one upset that wasn't my intention. and you have convinced me that it really is a hopeless situation.

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