If You've Ever Given Birth...

Brownms46 · Mar 29, 2002

MY first was 27yrs ago..and hard to remember anything but the PAIN! Geeze...I was in labor the first day...and contractions...ineffective as they were...lasted all nite. My mother slept in a chair that nite...my ex was on his way home...from military. I had decided I wanted my own doctor to deliver me...who had been my doctor since I was 13, and his wife my peds doc...:) Well....next day ...labor stopped ..so I went to a gyn floor. Shows you how long ago this was. I stayed there mininal contractions...watching TV. You used to have to pay for the TV seperately. A man came around and collected....geeze I'm dating myself. This was in Millard Filmore hospital in Buffalo, NY.

Well...weirdest thing happened to me while I waiting. It was storming...really bad. And this old cleaning lady came into the room.. She asked me what did I want? And I said... I'm having a GIRL!....I had been shopping for months..and if my girlfriend hadn't stopped me I was going to buy a dresss for the baby.....lol.

Well...she said. That's a boy! Made me mad! She said ...you see that butt sticking up in the air?? That's one of those lazy boys...LOL....(sorry guys). I was so mad at her...for even suggesting that I wasn't having a girl! Anyway...later on...I was talking to one of the nurses...and asked her what was that cleaning ladies name who had come into my room. She said what cleaning lady??? There had been no cleaning lady there during her shift???

Anyway...got pit...had pains...that felt like they were taking over my whole body....lord have mercy...felt like something had reached into my throat and was threatening to pull my insides out from there to my toes...oowwww! Anyway...lady partsl deliver... delivered at 1100hrs...(and he still sleeps late) 7 lb 13oz and 23inche long. I took one look at him...and said...."Lord he's a boy...and ugly too"! As I drifted off to sleep....I hear one of the nurses...say...oooooh my she's so disappointed. And I thought to myself...you need to get it together gurl...LOL. But he was ugly...:chuckle but I loved him with every fiber in my body...and soul...:). Now tall dark and handsome.

Second one...five years later.....barely got to the hospital in time. I had...had the burst of energy you get right before....first pain came...I thought ooh..it's nothing. Was takiing son on picnic the next morning...so I was fixing our lunch. Decided to lay down...hard contraction... one min apart.! Got up called the doc...decided I would take a bath....:chuckle...got all dressed up.in a tailor made carmel colored pant suit I had made in Korea.....put on make up....and then called my mom. My mother hit the house on the way out of the driveway...:chuckle.....Ex in Panama...when we were turing over the canal. MOM ran every red light getting there...and never saw even ONE cop...:chuckle. Also same hospital....same doctor...:) They met me with a wheel chair at the car....pain hit me so hard...I couldn't even move. They had me on a stretch running down the hall...and I was screaming...because I had the worst leg cramps in both legs...and was trying to get them to stop so I could stand up...:chuckle! No time for anything ...but to deliver...a girl... 7/7...21 inches.....@0500hrs..(.and she gets up early).....Yeahhhhh! Gorgeous...but in trouble..placed on a vent. The rest even a longer story...but I vowed...NEVER....NEVER again... :cool: !

night owl · Mar 29, 2002

Labor pains are like no other pains in my book. When I was a student nurse in L&D, I swore that I was adopting because nothing that BIG was coming out of my koochie! Lo and behold it didn't for the first...he is my "little caeser!" God bless him. The second, was a four hour labor. Got to the hospital @ 0145 and she was born 0215. No drugs, but that was enough for me. If I did "do it again," I'd try to go natural. With natural you very soon forget the pain and I was ready to go out dancin'! (No episie) With the CS, I suffered weeks after it. I have a question for all of you L&D nurses that I've been wanting to ask for the last 16 1/2 years...I'll send it over to the "ob-gyn nursing" forum...

mattsmom81 · Mar 29, 2002

It's so much fun reading all your stories! :)

Shay, you can handle this...women have been doing this for eternity and you can too!

The scary part for me was transition where (like other posters) I feared losing control... I sent everyone out of the room so I could focus...I needed a little Demerol (12.5 mg IV) to help me through...just decided I needed a little help at that time tho I was big on natural childbirth. My labor went too fast for me to have a paracervical block but if I'd had the choice I probably would have gone with that. Transition was also where I felt I might die--but knowledge is power....although it's very overwhelming psychologically and physically, I knew I would be OK. I think getting through this pain (I felt ripped apart) shows us women how tough we really are. :) Sound sappy?? LOL!

I would have no reservations demanding that no students or residents be involved in my care, I have done this myself and it is your right. Take some birth center/hospital tours, find what's comfy for you and go with your gut! I could never forgive myself if I had a home birth and something went wrong for my baby....but it is a choice you can make and lots of women do fine with a good midwife! Good luck whatever your choice! :)

BugRN · Mar 29, 2002

Shay,

Boy I haven't thought about this for a while!! Labor Pains....Hmm My daughter is 25, but I can imagine it like it was yesterday. 42 wks, started regular contractiions, went to the hosp. at 7am, only 2cm'.s Spent the day walking, reading, breathing thinking" This is easy". Ended up w/ FTP on Pit, enema, shave, IV, and clinging to the bed rails, feeling like my bones were breaking. Cont. fetal monitoring. Got something to take the edge off, Nysentil(sp)?? don't have around anymore I don't think. Got to fully around 8pm and then pushed for 3 hours! Finally totally exhausted, taken to the del. rm, draped, in stirrups, flat on my back, had an Epis, del. a girl 7lbs 9oz. Forgot the pain immed. after!!

Shay, someone else mentioned you'll get a different labor story from all of us because all our labors were different, like us! I didn't have an L/D background then, I'm glad! It will be hard knowing so much, but do what you feel in your heart is best for you! All primips who choose a birthing center don't know what labor is like either. Personnally if I were to do it again, I'd go for a hospital birth w/ a birth center, w/ a birth plan. Have the labor and birth you want, just know when to compromise. and remember it's no right or wrong way, no matter how the baby comes out, enjoy the birth experience, no matter what the journey is to get there! Good Luck!!

JillR · Mar 29, 2002

Now that I have had a few days to think about it, and it's not so late and I am not so tired, yes you do forget, or I should say the pain does not mean much to you after you have that baby in your arms.

With my first child, I was very prepared, had great nurses and an excellent doctor. The whole experience was great, even though the pain was comperable to my second child.

With my second child, I did not have a choice to go back to that same hospital, different nurses, different doc and they were not as understanding, compassionate and in my opinion professional as the first, it was just a horrible experience and I will never go back there again, even if insurance won't pay for it, I don't care. So I think that I remember the pain so much with my second child because the experience was not good.

It's funny though because with my first child I was single, pennyless, but I had a very supportive sister who went to birthing classes with me and was my rock during labor. With my second one I was married, and don't get me wrong my husband is great, but he saw no reason for classes and he was not prepared for what was to come. After the doc decided to start the pit (I was very unhappy about this), my hubby saw what labor was really all about and he did not expect what was to come, my sister arrived and helped me through the worst part and I will be forever greatful to her for that, again she was my rock. I cannot imagine what the second labor would have been like without her.

When I was in nursing school, I was able to do the L&D part at the place I had my first child, and I found that they were still very excellent. Just find the place that is right for you, the way things are handled means more thatn the pain, at least to me.

Shandy12 · Mar 29, 2002

It's fun reading everyone's L&D stories. Not good reading for a full-term primip though!

Mario, my advice is to not respond to a subject unless you are informed fully, and I've yet to meet a male who understood about labour pains!

We had three sons, and I elected to have an epidural with each one. I'm very glad I did. The labours were all over 8 hrs, and the last 3-4 were brutal.

I'm one of these "fortunate" women who have very painful menstrual cramps, to the point of nausea. It's just the way it is, and I'm glad to have discovered Ibuprofen. Labour pains were so much more severe. However, once the epidural was in and effective, it was just intense pressure in the low pelvis and perineum. The awful pain was gone.

Women have been delivering babies for eons, and without benefit of our technology and medical knowledge. I feel so fortunate to have been able to have a bed in a good teaching hospital, with a fully-staffed NICU(where I worked), and competent care. I didn't mind the residents there, because I knew the O.B. Chief of Staff was delivering my babies. It didn't bother me to have the student nurse either. She was cute as can be, excited as I was, and quite helpful and attentive.

It mustn't have been too bad an experience, as I repeated it x 2. We had 3 sons in 4.5 yrs, and it was a wonderful time in our lives.

Now, ask me about adolescence.............there's a different story!!!

Lynda

ktwlpn, LPN · Mar 31, 2002

Originally posted by shay
Okay, ladies...I have some questions here...

I'm an OB nurse. I deliver babies for a living. I have never personally given birth or ever been pregnant. So here's my question....in all honesty, what does labor really and truly FEEL like....other than painful?

I mean, is it crushing, stabbing, ripping, aching, WHAT? I can't exactly ask my labor patients these kinds of questions...so I want to hear from you.

Because I'm approaching 30, and although I want children very much, to be quite frank, labor scares the bejesus out of me...all of my friends, with the exception of ONE, had totally drug-free childbirth. I just want the lowdown....what does labor FEEL like???

Oh Shay-it isn't a test to pass or fail...Every baby comes into this world in his or her own way....I do remember thinking"this is not as bad as I thought it would be" I hated L&D as a student and really had no plans to have children and because of 2 horrible childbirth stories in my family I was scared spitless,too.(my mom came very close to dying -my aunt suffered brain damage from an infection) Tune out your friends and their opinions-you have to do what is comfortable for you-but be flexible.If you have your heart set on a certain scenario I can guarantee that the baby will have another idea...Nothing wrong with taking advantage of the best medicine has to offer-pain meds and technology...especially since you are already freaked out and not even preggie....And when you are raising that child tune out your friends,family and don't read too many helpful books-each child is an individual.Don't let yourself get freaked by what it should or shouldn't be doing because a freind says so...trust your pediatrician-not Aunt Martha....

micheledenisern · Mar 31, 2002

:) hello, have you ever given birth,

All I can say is that I personally had a great birthing experience at 20.

I did the natural thing, without pain medication, or an episiotomy. I labored at home, for abou 6-7 hours before I realized I was in labor. It all started out as a back ache. By the time I finally did go to the hospital, because I realized I'd lost my mucous plug, I was having contractions about 5 mins apart, and was 5 cm dilated. I went into labor about 11pm, and delivered my daughter at 1130 am the next day. I arrived at the hospital at 1000am, and had her at 1130. I was only at the hospital for an hour and a half before I had her. At one point I asked if the pain would get worse, and they said no. I was able to handle it with good breathing techniques, and the fact that I knew these people in the hospital where I worked.

Is it something I'd want to go thru everyday, NO, but I was able to handle it. And I was glad to go natural.

As I write this, my daughter is beside me asking me what it felt like.

well, it was like the biggest cramp I've ever had around my abdomen, that kept getting tighter and tighter, and there was nothing I could do to stop it, so I just breathed with it, and tried to keep my calm. Did I want to kill someone at this point---YES.

The actual birthing, was like having the biggest bowel movement I'd ever had, and it felt great.

Most women like to tell the horror story, But I can tell you, that I't was a good experience for me. I't truly was not as bad as I thought it was going to be. And I have the most beautiful daughter who is now 22 years old. I was only able to birth one child, but would have gone thru it again in a minute.

I hope that if you decide to have a child, that you also, think about breast feeding, I't is the most wonderful thing ever. It causes such a bond with your child, and closeness that you could never imagine. I'm not saying that bottle fed babies don't benifit, because they do, they still have the love and nuturing from their mother, but breast feeding , if you can, just seems so special.

I adopted my son at 10 weeks old, and bottle fed him, and felt just as close to him, but I will admit that I tried to breast feed him that first week we we're together, but he was just to used to the bottle.

well, I hope this is helpful to you,

not every birthing experience is hell. It can be quite beautiful.

Michele

wildhoney · Mar 31, 2002

I have no idea how that saying starts but that's ok.

I am one of those women who have had only c-sections and never got to experience the beauty & wonder of a lady partsl birth. Beauty & wonder? Did I over do that? ; )

I had to get cut open twice and I didn't get to experience true childbirth. I remember that saying when I start thinking like this....it's not in the progress that counts, but in the result. The result = two wonderful children. Sometimes I get this nagging pull or sensation that tells me to have #3. Then I quickly remind myself how selfish I would be if I did that. To have another child because I want to experience the "firsts" again, to experience a VBAC, to have another child because I like those little babies... slap!!! I'm fine now.

I think I'm just having one of those bad days of accepting that my child is now a teenager. Ugh! The letting go blues. It probably also doesn't help that I'm on my ::cough::....my friend is here for a short visit. : ) So that should explain things for ya.

What can I say? I like to share. Ha. : )

Back to birthin' babies....

I am proud to say however, I was able to contribute a massive amount of signatures that aided in the stoppage of drive through deliveries. I have seen too many babies go home too early and end up having problems. I was able to stay longer in the hospital because of my c-sections. The last day of being there I experienced a major hormonal drop and cried my eyes out. I was happy but yet in tears at the same time. ?? I'm just glad I was still there, in good care and told I was normal Seriously, there are far more serious things going on with women just after they give birth. Maybe not just physically but mentally as well. Things are getting a bit weird out there lately so I feel women should be able to get a bit more rest after they give birth. Let the baby stay down in the nursery, call when you want him/her. Oops, did I say something wrong?

Excuse my ramblin'

Have a wonderul and Happy Easter everyone. I'm heading to Vegas for a week of fun & frolic! Yahoo! :roll

mamabear · Apr 2, 2002

At last! A chance to unload my OB horror stories on an entirely new group.

I've given birth to 4 kids, from 1968 to 1980, and each was a reflection of the prevailing wisdom (??) of the day.

Baby 1 was born in 1968 in Chicago. As soon as I got settled onto a gurney in a dinky little room, a nurse came in, shaved off my pubic hair, and administered a 3H (high, hot, and hell of a lot) enema. About an hour later another nurse came in with 2 Seconals, which she said I "had" to take (I was only 22, and had yet to even consider nursing as a career). Good little patient that I was, I gulped down the reds. Every hour thereafter, I was given another Seconal, which I was also informed I "had" to take. Many, many hours later, the doctor finally came in and did a vag exam (RNs could only do rectal exams back then to check for dilation and effacement), pronouncing me "ready". I then received 100mg of Demerol and was wheeled into a freezing cold delivery room. Two nurses pulled me onto a delivery table, where leather restraints were fastened around my wrists, my legs were hoisted up into ice cold metal stirrups and also secured with leather straps, and some clown fastened a leather belt-like thing across my chest. Without any explanation, a rubber anesthesia mask was plopped over my mouth and nose, and that's all I remember until I woke up, feeling like I had just been on the losing end of a train wreck, to be informed that I had just given birth to a girl, 8lbs, 11oz, 22 inches long.

Baby 2, born at the same place in 1971, was almost identical, except for being induced (pitocin from Hell) and no Seconal.

With both births, I stayed on the postpartum unit for 5 days. Therre was no such thing as rooming in, and moms were encouraged to bottle-feed.

Baby 3 was born in 1976 in a small-town hospital in northwest Indiana. No enema, no shave, no meds of any kind. This was at the height of the "natural" birth craze. I could have used a little something, but all I got was an IV of D5W.

Baby 4 was born in 1980 at the same hospital as baby 3. I had a precipitous delivery and she was born in the hallway.

With babies 3 and 4, I stayed on the postpartum unit for 3 days, had round-the-clock rooming in, and was urged to breast-feed.

This was long before birthing suites were the norm, so there were separate rooms for labor, delivery, recovery and post partum.

robinhallrn · Apr 2, 2002

Okay - labor pains - her is my story!!

I was in labor for 36-1/2 hours (yes and I am not exaggerating). My labor pains were bearable for the first 12-14 hours. I would describe this pain as a very, very strong menstrual cramp that was squeezing in nature.

Now - for the rest of them......:imbar

I had a tremendous amount of back labor - it felt like someone was actually putting a butcher knife in my back and twisting it right through my spine. This pain was constant throughout.

I did have some Demerol, but it really did not help. When I failed to progress, they administered Pitocin. OH BOY!!!!!!!!!!! Imagine taking a razor blade and starting at your breast line and cutting all the way to your lower abdomen; now, multiple that by about 40 of them lined up across your tummy and that it how it felt to me. The pain was excruciating!!!!

When they actually allowed me to push, THAT FELT WONDERFUL!!! I suppose the pressure from the pushing relieved the pain somewhat. But it was constant nonetheless.

To sum it up - imagine that you have a pumpkin in your stomach and you are trying to 'poop' it out. That is what it feels like!! Poopin a pumpkin!!!

blitz · Apr 2, 2002

Hey, Shay -

Have you thought about a nurse midwife? I don't know if you have them in your area, but I've heard some wonderful tales of beautiful deliveries in the patient's own home. You know, Mom, Dad there in their own digs, comfortable surroundings. Sounds beautiful to me. I think I would have done anything to have had that option when I had my two, 1973 and 1977. Of course, this assumes a normal, healthy gestation time but NM's can assess and determine if any other intervention is needed and plan accordingly.

My own two were born in hospital. My first born, my son, was helped along with the MD rupturing the membranes as he wasn't too satisfied to let nature take it's course. I remember playing cards with my husband far into the day. Eventually, Dem did come along and I don't remember all that much pain. It seems that it was all focused mid abdomen and during the transition stage you just sort of become part of another plane. You're not aware of what is happening around you, you are that focused. Not only mentally, but physically. I've never experienced anything like it. My daughter, Devon, was born with the assistance of Pitocin, all 9 lbs, 4 oz of her. She came so quickly at that point, that the perineum ripped stem to stern, and no, I didn't even feel it. After that happens, the ice bag is your best friend! With the pitocin, your body takes over completely. You have no control, it's on autopilot. What an amazing experience! WOW!

You know, if we remembered that pain all that well, the world would not be as well populated as it is. And as far as your fear of failing, as was stated before, this is one of the most natural, wonderful experiences a person can have. Enjoy your pregnancy, pamper yourself and make plenty of time for your loved one. Then get ready, hold on tight, for the rest of your life will be totally changed with a love like you've never experienced!

Best wishes!