I need help trying to figure out what to do..

  1. A little history here. I'm a RN. My husband is a RN. I got pregnant and worked PRN with my first child, but it was too difficult for childcare and more of a PIA than anything, so i stopped working. My husband is FULLY supportive of this, and feels good that i am staying at home with our children.

    well i had another baby. He's 8 weeks old (and beautiful to boot! ) and i'm staying at home with him and my 2 year old. My husband is a traveling RN, but we are going to settle here in Chicago for a while so he can finish some classes for his BS. He'll just do traveling locally and staffing here because the money is better.

    The cost of living is HIGH here. We knew that, but are a little stunned by it i guess you could say. So it makes things harder. So i was thinking about going back to work. If i do, the situation would have to be right. It would more than likely be part time, and i want to work in the ER. I have NO INTEREST in med/surg nursing anymore. I've done my time. But i've not had any "real" ER experience. So i'm thinking of dropping in a few apps after i get my IL license here.

    I want to go back to work for a couple of reasons.
    1. because i need the adult interaction.
    2. we could definitely benefit from the money.
    3. i miss nursing (don't miss the BS, but miss the job in general!)
    4. it would take some of the load off my husband. That would be nice.

    But i'll miss my babies. And i would have to put them in some sort of daycare. I'm thinking i may put my 2 year old in some sort of nursery school. But what about my baby? i don't know if i have the heart to even be away from him for 2 days a week! And will it cost me more in daycare to do that than its worth to work? He's a breastfed baby, and i'm not worried about that. Cuz i know i can pump (i'm a MILK MACHINE! :chuckle )

    I'm in no rush to make this decision. Like i said, it has to be the right job, the right unit, the right money, etc...But i'm kinda going crazy at home with 2 kids 2 and under, and i think i would benefit getting out there a little.

    Any thoughts on how to come to terms with this? Or to make it easier for myself? Has anyone left nursing for a while to raise a family and gone back part time? How was it? Was it worth it? Was it worth the effort and strain it may have put on your kids/spouse?

    I'm not sure what i'm asking for help for. I'm new to Chicago, i have NO clue on how to even find a daycare setting. Much less what hospital to apply at. lol I guess this is more of a putting my thoughts down in writing post, and i will welcome any input! :chuckle
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  2. 11 Comments

  3. by   maureeno
    I think writing and then reading your thoughts and talking to your husband is your best help; while you are making your decision, what about connecting with other people [groups, volunteering,neighbors] for some adult contact? With two little ones, a working/student husband and living in a new place you are set for isolation.
  4. by   kimmicoobug
    OK, I am not a nurse (yet) but I can feel for your situation. I was in a sort of similar situation with my children and school. I took time off to have mine and then returned. My daughter was great in daycare, but my son just got kicked out of center after center. A lot of this had to do with the fact that I barely saw my children as I was working and attending school. Finally, my husband and I decided to work out a schedule so that he could care for the kids while I was at school and clinicals, and I cared for them while he was at work. Could this be an option with you if you are leery of putting your baby into daycare? Well, good luck to you. Definitely talk about it with your husband and I am sure that you guys will come up with some sort of solution.
  5. by   bagladyrn
    Just an alternate view - my son has been with a sitter, then daycare, then sitter when older his whole life (I had no choice - work or welfare and for me that was NOT an option). My son is now 24, no major traumas, good student, never any legal problems, college graduate and now a Navy man! The only effect it seems to have had on him (I think I've mentioned this before) is that most of the young women he shows an interest in are independent, strong minded young women
  6. by   June55Baby
    Snowymtn,
    Would there be some way you could work a night shift and your husband care for the kids?

    That little baby really needs his mama right now and although you can pump breastmilk.... its just not the same. He needs nuzzling, sweet talk, and smiles from mama as he nurses from her breast. A bottle of breastmilk from a stranger just isn't the same.

    I know there are always arguments from both sides, but I NEVER regret taking 6 years away from full-time nursing to be home with my children until they started nursery school. Then when I went back it was part-time for 12 years. Those were wonderful days of sleeping in and staying in pajamas on cold mornings watching Sesame Street and drinking hot chocolate while the other kids in the neighborhood were dragged from their warm beds, dressed, and shuffled off to daycare.

    Think long and hard.... but remember, if working doesn't pan out, you can always quit and stay home again. They are little for such a short time and they need to be influenced by their parents.... not strangers in a daycare.
  7. by   P_RN
    Our children were in day care a total of 3 month their entire lives.

    Hubby and I worked different shifts so one or the other was always around. Our kids were among the very few who always had a parent for a pageant or spelling bee.

    Having said that...... I am NOT necessarily recommending it!! In hindsight (always 20/20) I wish I'd been home more...perhaps worked only a weekend or so......But they turned out OK and none the worse for wear. Just their Mom is a little frazzled.
  8. by   mattsmom81
    Without any ER experience i fear it will be difficult for you to find occasional work there ...if you want to learn a new area facilities generally want some committment near fulltime.

    You might consider a Baylor plan (weekend plan) if your hubby is off weekends... you could share childcare and avoid daycare.

    You might also check the big city hospitals as they may offer onsite daycare...they do in my area.

    If you just want occasional work you might consider agency or PRN somewhere but you would likely have to be flexible and do some medsurg....but for good $$$ in fewer hours which is a tradeoff. I worked agency and PRN when my son was small ..the flexible scheduling worked best for me.

    Good luck whatever you decide!
    .
  9. by   patsue53
    I worked full time through all my children's babyhood. I was back to work when they were 8 weeks old (including the preemie twins who stayed in NICU for 2 weeks.) My children are now teenagers and the twins will be on their own very soon. If I had to do it all over again would I change it? YOU BET! If you can stay home with your babies then do it! Find another outlet to preserve your sanity. I wish so much that I could go back and spend all those hours with my babies! They'll be grown in a blink of an eye and you'll be wondering where the years went.

    Thank God we have the option of working if we have to. But honey, if you are fortunate to be able to stay home and raise your children, believe me you'll never regret doing it. And I'd wager that if you go back to work you WILL regret it eventually.
  10. by   ptnurse
    I have stepped in and out of nursing as my children/cash flow dictated. I just could not deal with the idea of daycare for my kids. After the first one I worked weekends for 7 years. My husband worked M-F and I worked weekends. After the second baby, the weekend program closed and now I just work one shift a week. I work at night when my husband can be home with the kids. I work a night on the weekend (more money in the shortest amount of time). Working just one shift helps out with the finances, keeps me sane with a little time away from my kids, and keeps my nursing skills up. Working opposite shifts is great for the kids, they always have a parent around and there is no child care bill. The obvious flaw is that it hard on the marriage. You don't get a lot of time together.
  11. by   Gardengal
    I would think that your best bet if you want to only work part time is to start in the specialty you know, recognizing that you are doing this as a means to an end. (I do not recommend sharing your immediate goal of going to the ED with a manager right away though, unless you have an immediate rapport in the interview)

    When you start working in a new facility you always have to do the general hospital orientation and credentialing stuff. It would be easier to be hired as a part time employee if you went to a unit where they would only initially have to train you on how they do it there...and not how to do many new tasks, and teach you new areas of knowledge. If you worked general med surg-it might be a possibility to try telemetry as a part time position. You have the med surg part down from previous experience, and could concentrate n learning rhythms and cardiac amergencies. Then you could do the next step to the Er-selling yourself as knowing med surg and cardiac and wanting to learn ER. Might be a slower way to go but could meet your needs of stimulation and income.

    Once you are a part of a hospital it is much easier to transfer within. It could also give you the opportunity to meet more local people to help give you personal info about childcare are in the area. Many times it is difficult to switch to a new new specialty on a part time basis because of the manager's belief that the cost of training and the length of time to get you to feel comfortable could be prohibitive. The less you have to learn for each new position, especially when you want to work limited hours makes the transition much easier each time and makes you a more attractive job applicant.
    Last edit by Gardengal on Dec 4, '02
  12. by   askater11
    Hi!!

    I'm a mommy of two young boy's. They'll be 4 and 2 this March.

    For adult conversation I joined a few playgroups. I never felt totally fulfilled with the adult conversations. My heart always focused and thought about nursing. There's something I love about working....and I feel blessed I can work once a week.

    I've worked the same unit for 5 years. I started getting burned out (bored) so I went searching for a new job. I started the long search in September. I thought with the job nursing shortage it wouldn't take long for me to get a step-down position...with a little bit more focus on the medical/surgical aspect.

    Mind you I the past 5 years I've worked cardiac step-down. The last time I worked medical surgical step-down it was 5 years ago. I couldn't believe how hard it was to get a job!!!!!!

    The first job offering occured immediately. It was for the kind of unit I wanted....a medical/surgical step-down unit...the problem was the nurse patient ratio was awful!!!!!

    It took me a couple months before I started hearing from other hospitals. I've been on 3 other interviews with no job offering. But finally yesterday I got a job offering. They're starting me on telemtry. (yikes not what I wanted but they said they'll see how I do and eventually if I do well...I'll move onto step-down)

    Be flexible on your job search. And it's smart of you to be cautious and pick a job that's ideal for you. There's a job out there for you....if that's what you decide to do. It just might take sometime in the facility before you get hired into E.R. But the Chicago area might be different then the Detroit area.

    My new job is a 12 hour position. (that's what all the positions around this area seem to be) I'm a little nervous about day care also. Fortunately I have my mother very close by, but will like to have a back up babysitter also. I'm hoping the ladies at work will have some ideas.

    Good luck with your decision!! And congratulations with the little newborn!!!!!!
  13. by   SnowymtnRN
    Thank you to all of you who took the time to reply. I've decided that the BEST thing for me and my family right now is to stay home, get my IL license, then see what happens. We are a one car family as of now (that's the sacrifice we made for me to stay at home with our first son, we sold our 2nd car) and that's become quite a PIA! :chuckle So we are planning on buying another vehicle at the beginning of the year. By then i'll have my IL license, then IF i can find a job that has on site daycare, or even just 1 day a week when my husband can stay at home with both boys, then i'll do it. otherwise i'll just wait. Somebody hit the nail on the head by saying they are only this little once, and at some point i'll be so incredibly thankful that i stayed at home with them. There is always time later to work. At least right now we aren't in SUCH financial ruins that i don't have to work yet, kwim? Anyway, thanks so much for all your input and ideas!!

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