I hate it when the male nurses on my unit...

Nurses General Nursing

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I hate when the male nurses on my unit refuse to work with female patients b/c they are a "man" and "the patient won't be comfortable working with a man." If the patient isn't comfortable, I'm pretty sure that she will say so! They keep doing this, and I want to say so badly, "Are you sure it's not you that's uncomfortable? I mean, you did know that you would be working with women, too, when you went to nursing school?" And every night, the charge nurse ends up assigning all the male patients with the male nurses, and sometimes they end up with less patients b/c there aren't enough male patients for the male nurses to have the same amount of patients as everyone else. This is rediculous:banghead:. Okay....I'm done:yawn:. Whew...Carry on!

When exactly does that ever happen?

I've had a male pt tell his nurse that I was flirting with him, and it made him uncomfortable b/c his wife was present. I was not flirting with him at all, I was just joking with him just like I do everyone else. So, it can definitely happen. I didn't get into trouble, b/c everyone knows that I joke with EVERYONE. He must have just thought I was being too friendly.

Yes I am agreeing, was I not supposed to?

I think alot of the men who don't want to take the female pts have a reason, perhaps they have already been the target of some female pt with an idea in her head to make some money with a false accusation.

I agree to a fair share of pts - maybe the next time your assigned a violent Hell's Angel biker pt you could trade :)

Anything involving personal care with a female = another female present in the room with me while it's accomplished. I'm not giving some sue-hungry person the opportunity to play that game.

Society accepts women nursing men, the reverse is never 100% though.

Sad, but true.

It's pretty unfair that I have had to take heavy male patients in trade because the little old lady felt it was improper for a big man to take care of her. What can you do? Fair is a subjective term.

Remember it the next time you see the men being used as hoyer lifts, security, bouncers and other 'extra things' for not a cent of extra pay. :)

Every time I hear that 'fairness' bit I let the women handle the schizophrenic patient that like to throw heavy things and punch. They don't like that fairness...

Yeah, that bothers me, too. We actually just had an inservice on this, b/c our hosp has had a lot of MN injuries due to this. Though men do tend to be stronger than women, they aren't, as you said, meant to be "hoyer lifts." Unforunately, I see that done a lot.

I've had a male pt tell his nurse that I was flirting with him, and it made him uncomfortable b/c his wife was present. I was not flirting with him at all, I was just joking with him just like I do everyone else. So, it can definitely happen. I didn't get into trouble, b/c everyone knows that I joke with EVERYONE. He must have just thought I was being too friendly.

Then that's not a false accusation. Joking with people is known to cause a lot of offense. That can not be compared to someone 'falsely accusing' you of things like sexual impropriety. Plus joking is usually involved in flirting. You say you weren't flirting but if it appeared that way well what do you expect?

What I meant was 'When exactly has a female nurse ever been falsely accused of sexually molesting a patient?'

Show me one news story. Just one...

Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.

for years, my husband tried to avoid taking care of female patients in "his dating range." (the ten years older and younger than him.) then we got married, and suddenly it became less of an issue for him. when i asked him why, he said "now that i'm married, accusations are less likely to stick."

Oh yeah. I told one girl I wasn't her boyfriend and if she didn't want to get hit what made her think I would get hit for her. Puhlease... She actually went to the DON. I told the DON that 'bouncer/bodyguard' duties are NOT included in 'Other duties as assigned' and that for me to do it would warrant an immediate pay raise of at least 5 dollars. That was the end of that nonsense...

I love it. Unless it is made clear to me at the time of hiring that there are specific duties I will have to do because of my gender and that I have agreed to this by accepting the position, I never let anyone wangle me into doing anything because of my gender. And this is not a comment on nurses generally. Most of the women I've worked with are team players but there are a few of these young girls still in the phase of life where they see every man as a minion. If I am asked to lift anything by myself for someone else (other than a patient) I just laugh as all of the nurses (and I love my co-workers dearly) weigh more than I do.

Specializes in Med-Tele, Internal Med PCU.
for years, my husband tried to avoid taking care of female patients in "his dating range." (the ten years older and younger than him.) then we got married, and suddenly it became less of an issue for him. when i asked him why, he said "now that i'm married, accusations are less likely to stick."

sad, but true. the ten year rule is something i'd never thought of, though it makes sense. it's a sad case that anyone has to go to work in a profession they (normally) enjoy and have to guard themselves against those they want to help.

just as women have to protect themselves from harassment from patients, we have to protect ourselves from false accusations. but as in the example i relayed earlier, the inmates shouldn't be able to run the asylum either. assignments are assignments, not invitations, we should be expected to deal with it as professionals.

all of that said, patient preference should be considered for more private actions such as foley placement and baths. but if they are incontinent, are they going to complain about whether a male or female cleans them up? i doubt it.

Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
sad, but true. the ten year rule is something i'd never thought of, though it makes sense. it's a sad case that anyone has to go to work in a profession they (normally) enjoy and have to guard themselves against those they want to help.

just as women have to protect themselves from harassment from patients, we have to protect ourselves from false accusations. but as in the example i relayed earlier, the inmates shouldn't be able to run the asylum either. assignments are assignments, not invitations, we should be expected to deal with it as professionals.

all of that said, patient preference should be considered for more private actions such as foley placement and baths. but if they are incontinent, are they going to complain about whether a male or female cleans them up? i doubt it.

a few years ago, when my husband and i were working on the same unit, i took care of a real jerk of a patient. there were two patients in the room, and the second night i took care of the other patient and our friend linn (not her real name) took care of the jerk. (no one could stand him two nights in a row.) linn is young and gorgeous. about 10 pm, the jerk started squirming around in the bed, grunting and groaning and carrying on . . . then he smirked smugly at linn and i and said "i just $h!t myself. now you lovely young ladies are going to have to clean me up."

linn was about to start doing so when i marched over to the jerk and said, "oh, no sir. we don't have to do anything."

"but, but, but" he sputtered. "it's your job."

"no," i said. "it's our job to make sure you get cleaned up. but we don't have to do it. i know a couple of lovely young men who would be happy to clean you up."

and i went and got my husband (a part-time martial arts instructor) and a weight lifter named carl. i told them what was up. carl, bulging muscles, shaved head and 6 foot 6 inches tall positively sashayed into the room and informed the jerk that "my boyfriend and i will be cleaning you up. and we'll clean you up as many times as we need to to teach you to mind your manners. but we're rather busy right now, so you'll have to wait until we have time to clean you up."

i'd like to say the jerk learned his lesson. but he tried it again the next night with another nurse. having heard the story, she gave him the exact same response. after that, he learned to ask for a bedpan!

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