I dont want to do this anymore!!!

Nurses General Nursing

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I dont know where to begin. I just do not want to be a nurse anymore. I really never did, since 2nd year of nsg school, but I didn't want to quit such a big commitment,I graduated. I have no desire to be a med surg nurse, in fact I would probably stink at it. I cant imagine being a med surge nurse. Thats why I went into ER right out of school, left that, did pedi home health for a while, now I am in the OR. I liked that for the first few weeks, now I hate that too. I dont know if its nursing, me, or I just cant hack it. The problem is I need this job I have for the benefits, and my salary. Plus my husband will *flip out* if I quit another job again. But I truely believe I shouldnt be in such a profession as nursing if my heart isn't in it..but.what else can I do? Is there anything you guys can suggest career/husband wise????? I have been telling him I love this new job, everythings going great, and actually it is, except that I am a nervous wreck inside, and I am counting the hours til lunch, break, and quitting time. I actually think he might divorce me if I quit!!! (or at the least be very very bitter towards me) I dont know whats bothering me more: the fact that I dont want to be a nurse, or the fact that I will dissapoint my family. Help......any advice will be appreciated.........:o

control said:
I'm glad my role model prof didn't seem miserable or unhappy, and she had a PhD. Personally, that's not for me. I would like to start on an MPH soon.

Also, just because you have a BS in nursing doesn't mean you MUST study it in grad school.

eta: please vote in the poll if you work in a non-clinical position:

https://allnurses.com/forums/f118/nurses-non-clinical-roles-what-kind-degree-do-you-have-155088.html

thanks!

My mil has a PhD in nursing. Nursing is her passion.

I want nurses with advanced degrees in nursing to be where they are because they love nursing and academics, and want to make a difference.

I don't want to get a BSN, but sometimes, I wish I could do my AAS in nursing over again at another college- one where the instructors love nursing and are passionate about nursing education.

I work in clinical nursing. But I looked for a way out for a long time until I started traveling.

1 Votes

Wow, we are all very fortunate we chose nursing. Just think of the professions that require bachelor degrees, then if you hate it, well too bad. If you a teacher that decides a room full of 2nd graders isn't your thing you are pretty much SOL. And what about all of the professions that people work hard at school and then can't find a job in the end.

There has to be a reason you chose nursing to begin with. Do a little soul searching and in the meantime find a job that matches your personality and your needs. Good Luck and hang in there!:icon_hug:

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RNOTODAY said:
gr8rn, purple, thanks for your response, and I agree totally about the counseling, I guess I just dont know where to go next career wise. I would LOVE a non clinical job, but not sure of the experience you would need, I have been an RN around 4 years, but not continuously.... IE: changed jobs alot... but I had one for 2 years, thats good, right??? LOL (it probably doesnt even count, it was home care).........I just wish right now I never went to nsg school......so many choices, but I am very limited in what I am *willing* to do.......I just know I cant go on like this.being all anxious inside.Sooner or later it will show in a big mistake that could hurt somebody...... that terrifies me.....

There are lots of different nonclinical areas. I myself went into Home Health as an office Manager. I really did need the change and it has been great this far.

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That's kinda uncool of your husband. Your burned out, plus, and this may sound old fashioned but the man is supposed to be the major bread winner and take care of his wife and family. I'm sorry you are going through all this and go through it myself from time to time. I am a pretty old lady though to be making any job changes but I would be willing to bet that something will rear it's ugly head just when I have decided to throw in the towel.

1 Votes
Specializes in NICU, ER, OR.

I have considered that it was me, and not the actual "jobs". But, since I have the RN, I feel like loser and a failure to be "wasting" my career. I took about a year off to have surgery (thankful, I was that I didnt have to work, sad, huh?) and I felt "guilty" at the same time that I wasnt working when there are so many opportunities for nurses now a days. I dunno. and to the poster who said abt hubby being primary bread winner? I have the same views.but can see his point too, of having the potential of making such a good pay and not even wanting to do it, after going to school for it.but.he has no idea, , in reality, what it is I and every other nurse go through on a daily basis. How could he? I am in a hospital right now, in a very big OR. Orientation is supposed to be 9 months, I am 3 months into it. Since the beginning, I through my heart and soul into learning it, and I have til this point, but I guess the "newness" wore off and now I am having the same old nurse-regret. Its weird, I like the knowledge nurses attain and posess, I love to learn, but I really hate the rush rush rush routine of clinical nursing. I really never thought I would hate it in the beginning.....I can remember the days when I only dreamed of starting IV's, inserting foleys......lol.... now, the thought of it makes me very nervous. Plus the thought of working with a bunch of backbiting, backstabbing, sharks that I work with now. I guess in a nutshell I have a lot of guilt over this. Like I am not a real nurse.Like I am not cut out for it, weak, etc. I have the knowledge, but cant cut it on the front lines....But I just *dont want* to cut it, I have no desire......and by the way, I called out today.....a familiar pattern with me when I get like this. I dont even want to go back tomorrow......I even considered agency nursing.shifts here and there.at least I could work in a ltc or something, wouldnt have to do alot of hands on, and I could have the relieving thought that if I never wanted to work at that particular place, I didnt have to!!!! I dunno.............keep the advice, thoughts coming, I deeply appreciate it.....

1 Votes
Specializes in NICU, ER, OR.
Haunted said:
That's kinda uncool of your husband. Your burned out, plus, and this may sound old fashioned but the man is supposed to be the major bread winner and take care of his wife and family. I'm sorry you are going through all this and go through it myself from time to time. I am a pretty old lady though to be making any job changes but I would be willing to bet that something will rear it's ugly head just when I have decided to throw in the towel.

I agree with you, but I cant really say I am "burned out".I have only been in my current job 3 months, nursing a lil over 4 years, and not continuously.I job hopped some. I think he is just frustrated that I *won't* stay at one job...... He knows what I can make, and he wants that security for our family.......so do I, but at the expense of my nerves, I just dont want to do that. Nursing is not just a job where you should "tough it out". we deal with peoples lives, if we make a mistake, people could be hurt, and I cringe of that happening to me. Just typing that made me think..maybe I am too anxious... afraid of the unknown, the fear of that one big mistake I might make one day?????? Anybody know what I mean? Maybe it just really is too much responsibility that I am willing to take on. Thoughts?:idea:

1 Votes
Specializes in PICU, Nurse Educator, Clinical Research.

I SO empathise with you! I think we all get a little bit brainwashed during school to think EVERYONE has to do some time as a hospital bedside nurse. I think there are SO many nurses out there who do bedside care and really excel at the job....and a good percentage of them do love it. However, I think it's important to remember the line they give you when you start nursing school about how there are countless ways to be a nurse.

I knew, from the time i even considered nursing, that i wanted to eventually do something that would combine nursing training and knowledge with my existing skills and interests- teaching, training, and coming up with new ideas. I love innovation, and my favorite thing in the world is to teach someone how to do something, and see how they light up when they 'get it'. doesn't matter if it's how to use a complex phone (which I did for a number of years), or how to do chest compressions on a CPR baby (which I do now in my current job). Or explaining how communicating in a certain way can make their job more enjoyable. I love it when I hear that I taught someone something that helped them- either in life, or in clinical practice.

I work now as a clinical educator in LTC, and I've been a nurse for about 10 months. I had 5-6 years of corporate experience, much of it doing training. I felt a lot of guilt that leaving bedside care so quickly made me a loser nurse, like the OP said. But, like her, I felt like every moment outside of work was spent being miserable about being AT work! That's no way to live.

If you put your resume on a job board, i think you'll find that there are plenty of places who would hire you for a non-clinical job. Be open when you're looking for a job, too- try to approach your search by thinking of what you like, and what you're good at, NOT at why you hate bedside nursing. You have the training, and the knowledge- so now, figure out how to combine that with your skills and interests to find the right line of work for you.

1 Votes
Specializes in Med-Surg, , Home health, Education.

How many different departments or positions have you worked in your 4 years? I'm the type that it takes me a couple of years to even feel comfortable with what I'm doing. I can remember switching from Med-Surg to homehealth and thinking "I can't wait until I know what I'm doing"...I felt comfortable with being a nurse, but all the changes with documentation, medicare guidelines etc make me uneasy that I'll make a mistake until I get comfortable with it. I wish you the best in whatever nursing position you choose. :)

1 Votes
Specializes in NICU, ER, OR.
Dorito said:
How many different departments or positions have you worked in your 4 years? I'm the type that it takes me a couple of years to even feel comfortable with what I'm doing. I can remember switching from Med-Surg to homehealth and thinking "I can't wait until I know what I'm doing"...I felt comfortable with being a nurse, but all the changes with documentation, medicare guidelines etc make me uneasy that I'll make a mistake until I get comfortable with it. I wish you the best in whatever nursing position you choose. ?

This will be my third department or "specialty" 2 jobs in one specialty, another position in home health, and now the OR. I always learn quickly, sups are always satisfied with my performance, have been asked to go off orientation early always ( I know that it benefits the facility more than me) I guess its just me, I either get bored, scared, anxious, I dont know.I just know I dont want to go to work anymore , providing direct care to patients.

1 Votes
Specializes in NICU, ER, OR.

Ok everyone, since we are on the topic of getting another position, how should I handle this?

If I should decide to leave my curent job, which I am seriously considering... I am still on orientation, and not counted as staff yet... I would assume would not want an orientee to stay on even a day longer then she wanted, since they are paying me and the preceptor, and staying would be pointless, since I am not any help to their schedule. Right?

Ok, but I would like to inquire about a non clinical position at this facility, if they have any, etc, but the question is, do I talk to HR first, my manager, or what?

1 Votes

how about doing mds work? you have to come to the floor once in a while to assess the patient, but no direct patient care is required. you have to fill out the mds form in the computer. you dont have to work weekends or holidays either.

1 Votes
Specializes in NICU, ER, OR.
graduatenurse said:
how about doing mds work? you have to come to the floor once in a while to assess the patient, but no direct patient care is required. you have to fill out the mds form in the computer. you dont have to work weekends or holidays either.

sounds great..now what exactly is that? I have heard the term, but right now it escapes me........

1 Votes
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