Having the correct diagnosis for a workplace problem helps with finding the right solution. Labeling every conflict as bullying can lead to disciplinary overkill or its flip-side, a devaluation of the actual cases. At the same time, applying typical problem-solving and conflict resolution tools can put the target in harm's way. How then, do you identify a bully in the workplace
NursesGeneral NursingArticle
The protracted tension a bully creates takes a physical toll. Adrenalin ramps up. Muscles tighten. The mind races long after the shift ends. The longer a targeted employee is exposed to abuse, the more likely they are to suffer at least one disorder from a laundry list of medical maladies--digestive tract ailments; sleep disturbances; neck, shoulder and back strains; cardiac complaints; memory problems; migraines. The illnesses are genuine, but the usual treatments may give only temporary or partial relief until the underlying work situation is remedied. Here's the real kicker--absences resulting from the bullying behavior now give the bully a visible and measurable excuse to discredit, demote or dispatch the victim entirely.
The bully's primary goal is to undermine and deactivate someone they perceive as a credible threat. They employ tactics that are sneaky, manipulative, and deliberately frustrating. They may take credit for the target's ideas and efforts, pretend ignorance about agreements reached or promises made, berate the target publicly (or privately, without their knowledge until word gets back to them), and try to convince the victim that any problems are due to their own misunderstanding, misinterpretation or incompetence.
Bully: "Sue, I called you in here to remind you about the big Shared Governance meeting next week and go over the list of things our unit wants addressed.
Target: "But, you gave me next week as vacation time three months ago."
Bully: Well, yes, but that was with the understanding that you'd be available if I needed you. You're one of my most valuable staff members, and I need you to go to this meeting. Just run in for the two hours and you can be on your way. No big deal."
Target: It is a big deal. I never said I'd be "available" during my vacation week. I wouldn't have agreed to that. I'm going to be in Cancun on Tuesday. Can't one of the other committee leaders go?"
Bully: "I suppose I'll have to get someone else. But I'll also have to factor this uncooperative behavior into your yearly eval next month."
Or,
Target:"Roberta, you talked at the unit meeting about your new project to get the families more involved in the diabetic patient's meal planning. That was my idea! I gave you six pages of information and resources and asked if you wanted to work with me on it. Remember?"
Bully:"What I remember is that you gave me some vague notes that I could barely read. I had to spend hours and hours deciphering your scatter-brained proposal [untrue] and adapting it to our unit. I'm calling it my project because, after all of the time I spent working through that mess, it is my project."
Target:"But what you presented today was almost word-for-word what was in my proposal. That proves there was nothing wrong with what I gave you. You can't just take my idea and say it's yours."
Bully:"And you can't make accusations just because you didn't get all the attention you hoped for. Don't worry yourself about this anymore. I was going to suggest to Nancy that she make you head of the committee that would come up with some sample forms and scripting, but you don't have to worry about that now. In fact, you'd probably be better off just keeping your eyes on your regular work. I heard that Nancy's been getting complaints from your patients lately. "
"Complaints? What kind of complaints?"
"Nothing specific. Just that you don't act like you enjoy your job very much. And you seem preoccupied. Maybe you've been thinking too much about this plan of yours, trying to be a hero, when what you really need to do is focus more on your patients."
Ouch!
Contrary to popular opinion, although a target may be inexperienced or or in some other way vulnerable, many times it's the capable, confident person--someone who is highly skilled and well liked--who unintentionally fans the flames of insecurity and brings out the worst in a bully. These victims are shocked. Their evaluations have been consistently good. No patient or client has complained. They've even been precepting or mentoring new people Then--bang!--they're written up on flimsy charges (and informed they're now on thin ice). Every action they take is scrutinized for the smallest error. They feel like their own words are twisted against them. And the progression tracks swiftly downhill from there.
What happened? Most likely, the target got too good for the bully's comfort.
