How many of you married doctors? - page 11
Hi all! I'm currently a student at Johns Hopkins SON, just starting, and I'm wondering how hard it will be to meet and date some of the male med students here to seek out future husbands. Don't... Read More
Jul 17, '02OK, I did not marry a doctor--I married a guy I met in Navy Hospital Corpsman school in 1973, and we are still married, and have 2 grown daughters and one 16 year old boy. He is still the love of my life.
Doctors are all so dysfunctional, and they all seem so socially inept, anyway--it's like, when we were all teenagers and college kids and DATING, they were all nerds who could not GET dates. Well, that's true for the American ones at least!!
I even know a couple who, literally, are an embarassment due to their atrocious table manners!
BUT--let me make a confession here--some (definitely not all) of the Middle Eastern guys, especially the Arabic ones, are soooo smooth and soooooo gorgeous, I have been tempted a time or two--NOT to say I have had an affair, but, boy, there was one, from Lebanon--literally, my heart used to pound when he entered the room, and he was a MASTER at the art of flirtation. We used to call him "Gorgeous George." And the way he dressed----soooo elegantly; very GQ.
So, anyway, here is my confession--one day, I was standing out in the hall at the hospital where I worked, talking to my husband (who had stopped by to meet up for lunch.)
The gorgeous brown eyed (velvety, liquidy brown eyed) doctor came by and said hello to me, in this VERY sexy voice, and gave my husband a once-over, then continued on his way. My husband said, "Who was that?" and I said, "Just some jerk."
Later on, I was working alongside the doctor. He asked, "Who was that guy I saw you talking to in the hallway?" (meaning my husband.)
I replied--God, I still can't believe I did this--"Oh, just some jerk."
This was over 20 years ago, and just recalling that doctor's face STILL makes my heart pound. Men do not DESERVE to be that good-looking. The song "Smooth" HAD to have been written with him in mind.
Jul 17, '02"Don't rely on anyone but you to take care of you. Men die and salaries decline, but if you learn to rely on yourself first you know you will always be okay no matter what."
That's GREAT advice, no matter what profession you choose.
I married a 'Dr.,' not an M.D. but a Ph.D., and I knew him (and loved him) way before he was ever a Ph.D. We were friends about 4 or 5 years first. Knowing that his parents raised him right (he's also a P.K., a 'preacher's kid') and that he is a good man with character, high morals and standards....and that he LOVES me....that means more to me than his doctorate. (Academia has their share of Ph.D.s who expect to be worshipped as well....especially by pretty young co-eds.)
19 is young. You have so much time. My friends used to tell me that 'Mr. Right' always seemed to show up when you were least looking for him, and least expecting him. I never believed them, but you know what, they were RIGHT.
Good luck to you.
Jul 17, '02You know, funny thing--probably absolutely the nicest doctor I ever met in my life went to Johns Hopkins. I worked with him when he was an intern, all through his residency, then he went off to do a research year. He is well-known now, and married to a nurse. If I remember correctly, he went with her all through his residency. Still a great guy. HE never had a big ego; still doesn't.
I, too, have known nurses who wanted to marry doctors SPECIFICALLY because they thought the prestige (?) and the things like hosting fancy dinner parties would be part and parcel of it, and they wanted to live that way, or were doctor's daughters and remember their MOTHER'S lives being that way.
But, you know what? I think most doctors nowadays are just regular folks, like us, who want to wear blue jeans and T-shirts after work and raise their kids in good school districts and wash their cars and go to church and see their kids' soccer games and barbecue on the weekends. At least, all the ones I know are like that. Just regular people.
Then again, I don't know what the high-society doctors, in places like Dallas and NYC are like; if their wives have to maintain a certain image and wear designer clothes and do charity work and hostess formal dinner parties---I would not find that fun, but I don't fault those who would.
I think young JHUNurse just wants to meet some nice guys with whom she has something in common, at least for the time being. Give the girl a break!!
JHU Nurse, my only advice is, "So many men, so little time!" Play the field for a while and find who is right for YOU, whether he is a doctor, a garbage collector, a police officer, or even unemployed. Why worry at this young age about marriage? What is so wrong with enjoying your 20s (or longer) as a single woman?
Also, as far as NYC? Wait 'til you get a year of solid med surg nursing under your belt, then take a travel assignment there, where you will meet a smogasbord of men.Last edit by stevierae on Jul 17, '02
Jul 18, '02The most gorgeous doc I ever met had strong hands, light milk chocolate tanned wrists with a gold bracelet chain and light brown arm hair, just enough to look soft without being fuzzy. It was 7am after a long night shift and he examined a 2 year old barely making her whimper, and I have never forgotten those hands. He could have asked anything of me at that point...But I honestly wouldn't know him if I fell over him now, was too tired to remember his face.
Personally I would shy away from marrying or dating a doc because many people automatically assume you are a gold digger. Along with some docs without social skills that think they are God's gift. Give me a big burly fireman or policeman any day (sigh).
Also have an affinity for geeky math types but rarely meet any of those around here. I need to move to a city somewhere.
Jul 18, '02One of my friend dated a resident ( in cardiac surgery) for 10 months. She broke up because she couln'd stand him being so used to feel like he is God. Really, they spend their day being admired and worshiped by patients, and then have to come home to be an ordinary human being!?!?! Even the most adequate guy (he was a really nice and sweet guy) will start believing he's more than everyone else.......
Aug 23, '02Implants are the answer to your prayers. With implants you can have any man you like! Look, you could have Ted Turner...He seems to like implants. Why stop at a Dr. when you could get ol' Teddy boy?
<------implants....he he he!
***warning: this of course is a joke, please do not go out and get implants*****Last edit by Sarahstudent on Aug 23, '02
Aug 23, '02I dated two doctors after my divorce, a psychiatrist and a head & neck surgeon. The surgeon worked WAAAAY too much -- he had already had a marriage and several relationships tank due to the workload. Yeah, he was wealthy (and I definitely wasn't!) but it wasn't worth it. The psychiatrist was just a little too odd.
Want my advice? Go on a medical mission to a third-world country. You will feel filthy rich when you come back. Marry or not, but live on less than you make. You'll have everything you need.
Aug 23, '02Originally posted by Sarahstudent
Implants are the answer to your prayers. With implants you can have any man you like! Look, you could have Ted Turner...He seems to like implants. Why stop at a Dr. when you could get ol' Teddy boy?
<------implants....he he he!
***warning: this of course is a joke, please do not go out and get implants*****
:roll You should title this "Ode to the Trophy Wife" Good One!:chuckle
Aug 23, '02Coming from a male nursing student, I'm glad to see that their are a lot of women out their interested in more than money. I think I might put off dating till I turn 30.
Aug 24, '02Honey if you want money I would suggest the CEO of the hospital, not the doc. Course I'm not sure how you would meet one but I'm sure if you are enterprising enough you'd find a way.
I work with some really decent docs, I appreciate their intelligence and the way they handle their patients. I appreciate that they listen to me and act on my concerns or suggestions. However as much as I like the working professional relationship I have been able to develop with several of the physicians I would not socialize with them, let alone date them. It is the professional relationship that I like, nothing more. But then maybe because that is what I want.
Also have several docs who enjoy flirting with the nurses, though can only think of two that I know act on those flirtations. I can think of only one doc who is single that I work with, and he happens to be the one doc I despise. What a dweeb.
Aug 24, '02JHUnurse, everyone has pretty much said what needs to be said from every viewpoint. You really should focus your mind and efforts on your studies and finding out what it takes to do your future work well. Who knows, you might stumble on Mr. Right along the way without even trying. This happened to a friend of my daughter's. She married a young man that she went to nursing school with (way after graduation). Now they are both RN's, lucky enough to be working at the same hospital, and getting ready to start a new family. This young lady was very serious about nursing school while she was there and rarely dated, yet now, a few years later, she is happily married and she reached her career goal.