HELP Resident calling baby "stupid" What to do!!!??

Above: Despite their relatively large cranial capacities, babies such as this one are so unintelligent that they are unable to distinguish colorful plastic squeak toys from food sources. LOS ANGELES--A surprising new study released Monday by UCLA's Institute For Child Development revealed that human babies, long thought by psychologists to be highly inquisitive and adaptable, are actually extraordinarily stupid.
The study, an 18-month battery of intelligence tests administered to over 3,500 babies, concluded categorically that babies are "so stupid, it's not even funny."

Sample Results:
Baby #2,678:

TEST SITUATION:
THROWN TO PACK OF WILD DOGS.
RESULT:
EATEN.
Baby #217:

TEST SITUATION:
WRAPPED IN PLASTIC SHEETING.
RESULT:
COULD NOT FREE SELF. NEARLY SUFFOCATED.
Baby #856:

TEST SITUATION:
PLACED IN CENTER OF LAKE ERIE IN ROWBOAT WITH NAUTICAL MAP TO SHORE PROVIDED.
RESULT:
STILL ADRIFT NEAR ST. LAWRENCE SEAWAY.
According to Institute president Molly Bentley, in an effort to determine infant survival instincts when attacked, the babies were prodded in an aggressive manner with a broken broom handle. Over 90 percent of them, when poked, failed to make even rudimentary attempts to defend themselves. The remaining 10 percent responded by vacating their bowels.
"It is unlikely that the presence of the babies' fecal matter, however foul-smelling, would have a measurable defensive effect against an attacker in a real-world situation," Bentley said.
Another test, in which the infants were placed on a mound of dirt outdoors during a torrential downpour, produced similarly bleak results.
"The chicken, dog and even worm babies that we submitted to the test as a control group all had enough sense to come in from the rain or, at least, seek shelter under a leafy clump of vegetation or outcropping of rock," test supervisor Thomas Howell said. "The human babies, on the other hand, could not grasp even this incredibly basic concept, instead merely lying on the ground and making gurgling noises."
According to Howell, almost 60 percent of the infants tested in this manner eventually drowned.
Some of the babies tested were actually so stupid that they choked to death on pieces of Micronaut space toys. Others, unable to use such primitive instruments as can openers and spoons due to insufficient motor skills, simply starved to death, despite being surrounded by cabinets full of nutritious, life-giving Gerber-brand baby-food products.
Babies, the study concluded, are also too stupid to do the following: avoid getting their heads trapped in automatic car windows; use ice to alleviate the pain of burn injuries resulting from touching an open flame; master the skills required for scuba diving; and use a safety ladder to reach a window to escape from a room filled with cyanide gas.
"As a mother of four, I find these results very disheartening," Bentley told reporters. "I can honestly say that the effort I have expended trying to raise my children into intelligent beings may have been entirely wasted--a fool's dream, if you will."
Study results also prompted a strong reaction from President Clinton. "All of us, on some primitive, mammalian level, feel a great sense of pride in our offspring," Clinton said. "It is now clear, however, that these feelings are unfounded. Given the overwhelming evidence of their profound stupidity, we have no choice but to replace our existing infant population with artificially incubated simu-drones, with the eventual goal of phasing out the shamefully stupid human baby forever."


http://www.onion.demon.co.uk/theonio...upidbabies.htm

WOW! NICU nurses saying it's ok to swear at a baby as long as it's in a gentle tone, and they have NO idea what we are saying? Seriously, not trying to be mean, but where did you go to nursing school? This post REALLY got me steaming then to see posts that nurses who are SUPPOSED to be advocates for patients are saying this ok?? REALLY!

I have a son who is autistic and let me tell you about patients running low! NEVER EVER have I cussed at my child, when I feel like saying something negative I replace it with a POSITIVE. Not only does he not hear swear words, but it keeps the positive energy flowing, it doesn't allow you to get in a horrible mood. Now let's add that on top of my autistic son, I have three others. Save your "Stressful, sometimes we need to vent" crap for the wolves! Wow.

And on another note... if you can't say it around the parents, you shouldn't say it to the child. Children no matter what age KNOW what you're saying. That is when their little brains and bodies are the most active. They learning and growing. If you are even tense they're going to feel it. If you're cussing, you're tense, and maybe you should walk away and let someone else tend to the patients needs, while you regroup, or better yet... find another profession! One NICU nurse one time said my baby was "****** off" cause he was crying. No sweetheart, he couldn't breathe, couldn't eat, couldn't be held, he was scared, hungry, in distress, but NOT ****** off.

I can't even type anymore, I'm going to end up hurting someones feelings. This post didn't go to the bad nurses, but most certainly went to nurses whom think this kind of behavior is acceptable. Learn how to "take a chill pill" and calm down. You think your job is rough, try living it 24/7!

Ok. So we had a super sick baby and the blonde tomboy female resident called the baby "stupid"!!! OMG I was shocked!!!!!!!!
The other night she said "F-ing(F-word) baby"!
OMG I just cant believe it!!!!!!!!
How would you guys handle this. I need to say something but I new in the dept. Apparently, she does it all the time. AND I am not going to let her get away with this!

Her profanity was innappropriate. But yes we all have our ways of coping and sweetly telling a baby that keeps yanking out lines that they are being a little turd and are not your friend that night .. I don't see anything wrong with it as long as the parents aren't there and you know your coworkers wont' be offended. I don't swear at my patients but they do get called (lovingly) little turkeys, monkeys, etc. when they are wild and frustrating.

I think calling them little pet names is ok. I did that to my children, but at the same time, why do you do this when their parents aren't around? That's really weird. I would think if you're not saying anything offensive to them then you should be able to say it around the parents. I love it when nurses would cuddle my baby when trying to get him to eat and say come on you little turkey bird open up and eat! and we would laugh at him being stubborn, but that wasn't offensive to me... It just sounds funny when nurses say "as long as the parents aren't around we say this or that". Anything you're gonna say to a patient, child or not, should be able to be said infront of family.

the resident is not the patient. The resident CHOSE to get into the profession. Compassion is for the patient, at that time. The resident is an adult, with full ability to make choices and should be held accountable, just as nurses are held accountable for their actions. This nurse is an advocate for her patient first and foremost. Maybe understanding for the resident can come later, but initially it's for that baby. This OP should absolutely be compassionate for all, but in this moment, the resident is not her responsibility. That's just crazy to post that she should include herself to the likes of those that are hypocritical, pompous, and insufferable. No way. Nurses are there for the patients, families, etc - since when are we charged to care for the resident or doctor issues? Please.