Head Nurse got on me for no reason

  1. My boyfriend and i have been together for a year and a half. we have our ups and downs like any other couple. One of the "downs" is that he is schizophrenic. He is 27; im 21 (he has been having it since his early 20s). I have been knowing since we started dating. He takes he's meds and goes to dr appts like he suppose to. its like there isn't anything wrong with him.

    I recently started a CNA job at the mental hospital that he goes to. i like it alot. Well one day at work on my break, i saw my bf. it was a routinely mental exam just to see what his mental status was and how he was doing. He saw me and started talking and flirting with me. I didn't want the other workers saying anything so i told him that i'll see him when i get home and i have to get back to work. he told me he loved me and left. i guess the other nurses overheard and said something to me. They were saying things like "you're crazy for being with him" and "you could get in trouble for dating a patient".

    I told them kindly that what i do outside of work is my business. i guess it wasn't to their liking because they told the head supervisor i've been flirting and messing with the patients. i explain to the nurse that i have been with him for over a year, i know about his illness, and we been together before i got the job. She said that it was inappropiate what i did. I didn't even to anything. i told him that i was at work and i would see him when i get home.

    I don't understand what i did wrong. i told him to leave so i can work. Was it inappropiate for talking to him or was the nurses just being nosy?
  2. 4 Comments

  3. by   CaLLaCoDe
    This makes my head spin! I can't believe the pettiness of your fellow staffers. Try not to get too upset with their unjust behavior. I would simply tell the supervisor, when asked, the truth and be done with it. Perhaps those other coworkers are jealous of your intelligence, since you express yourself well. Proven by your well written post. Chin up!

    My Uncle was mentally ill and took his meds. He was married and had a family. The ignorance of your coworkers is profound. It hurts me to read your post. Knowing what I know. Anyone of us could have a mental breakdown. Simply put, they are a heartless lot!
    Last edit by CaLLaCoDe on Apr 17, '09
  4. by   Prettyladie
    they are just nosey!!!!
  5. by   SummerGarden
    i would have agreed with your supervisor that, "yes, it was inappropriate for him to flirt with me, which is why i asked him to leave. i also find it inappropriate for my co-workers to have come to you blowing the entire situation out of proportion and out right lying about the incident. in the future i would appreciate it if you discuss matters and concerns with me first because it is difficult to defend against gossip otherwise."
  6. by   emmalou*
    Simply put; it's none of their business and here in Australia your manager and coworkers' attitude might even be considered bullying and harassment towards you - you just can't go around discussing people's personal lives in our workplaces, you have to tread very carefully. Quite frankly, your manager handled it badly, she should be more concerned about gossips in the workplace affecting the workplace culture, than your personal life. If this happens again, I would be requesting advice from HR.

    The above posts have summed it up nicely so there's nothing else I can add except to say that I'm a good 15 years older than you and if I saw my husband at my workplace I would be chatty and friendly with him, and if he was ill I would be affectionate with him. End of story.

    You handled things really well so I'm not sure that there's anything else you can do except to try to rise above it, which you clearly are. :heartbeat I guess if you want to feel comfortable in your workplace, you might need to be careful with interacting with your boyfriend if he's at a medical appointment, but quite frankly if it was me, I would be setting some limits with your co-workers.