First Impressions Matter, B**ch!!!! - page 7

:( Yanno, I always try to make a good first impression with patients and their families. It freakin' matters. It sets the whole tone, and it really makes a difference in what kind of rapport you... Read More

  1. by   Q.
    Reading mjlrn97's post made me wonder.

    At what point DO you allow yourself to get weighed? I would imagine esp with a pulmonologist, who may be watching for edema or other things. At what point do you as a nurse with limited knowledge say "ya know, maybe my doc needs this weight for reasons I have no clue about."

    I'm not trying to start an argument, I am trying to explore this. No, I've never had an eating disorder, yes, I've had weight problems in the past, and yes there are many things done at the doctor's office that I hate: paps are among them.

    Plus, I don't think it matters if the nurse asking for the weight is skinny or not. Sometimes in reading these posts the anger towards "thin people" seems a bit...misdirected. The nurse in mjlrn97's post did nothing that I myself would not have done. I ask for a weight. Patient refuses. I explain why it's needed, patient refuses. Fine. It shouldn't matter I'm thin. What matters is I've presented to my patient WHY something is needed so that as her nurse, I feel like I've done my job and her refusal is an informed one.

    Let's remember that Shay is upset that this nurse passed judgement on her with her apparent disapproval that Shay picked up on. That is the problem here. Not that the nurse asked for the weight!
    Last edit by Susy K on Sep 14, '02
  2. by   shay
    Good question, Susy.

    I will allow myself to be weighed when I am pregnant. I will allow myself to be weighed if I have an obvious health problem (like pulm. edema, kidney malfunction, yadda yadda....you get my gist). I will allow myself to be weighed if a RX is weight-based.

    I won't allow you to weigh me if I'm in a psychiatrist's office for a consult (....think we've established that? LOL!), I won't allow you to weigh me if I'm coming to see you for a mysterious bump on my wrist, I won't allow you to weigh me if I'm coming in for a re-check of a problem to make sure it has resolved and that problem had nothing to do with my weight.

    But if you tsk tsk me and give me disapproving looks and look me up and down, you not only have a snowball's chance in hell of getting me on the scale, you've also just opened yourself up to the wrath of the Queen B*tch of the Universe and should duck or run. :chuckle
  3. by   researchrabbit
    Originally posted by shay
    But if you tsk tsk me and give me disapproving looks and look me up and down
    I've never seen a fat person do this to another fat person, it's always someone who's never had a weight problem.

    A former fat but now thin person will be more than happy to share what worked for them (think Richard Simmons), and may even go too far in wanting to help someone else (and then irritate the heck out of someone), but they are rarely judgemental. They've been there.

    Thin people are not uniformly judgemental. Most thin people are lovely people, just as most fat people are lovely people.

    Suzy, it's not really anger at thin people, it's anger at thin people who are judgemental about a problem they've never had to deal with. (think Elizabeth Hurley's comment about Marilyn Monroe's dress..."I'd kill myself if I ever got that fat.")
  4. by   VivaLasViejas
    SuzyK---In response to your post: I probably should've clarified why I go to a pulmonologist in the first place. He's my asthma doctor. I've never had problems with CHF, edema etc. As for the weight thing......well, I love thin people, wish I were one of them etc. It's just this particular nurse......she's very polite, and I'm just as polite in return when I refuse to get on the scale, but she always speaks to me like I'm a child, and I don't care for that.

    Now, I always let myself be weighed when I was pregnant (that's been a long time ago), and of course when I had to have laser surgery for kidney stones. I will also allow it when I've been away from a scale for awhile and honestly don't know what I weigh. But as an overweight woman, I've gone through so much crap in doctors' offices where I'd go in with carpal tunnel or a sore throat, and the first thing out of their mouths was "I can't treat you unless you lose weight first". I'm not kidding. So if I sound a little snotty about the weight issue, that's why I won't get on the scale unless there's a DAMN good reason for it.
  5. by   mario_ragucci
    Don't sweat it, Shay. There are many insensitive and down right idiot people in this world. they serve to test you. I can appreciate what you are saying.

    There are several questions that are not considered polite to ask. Like, when people ask me, "where you from." If you are intrigued by my sounds, you got no right to ask my history! Or, when someone asks you, "do you smoke"....its the same thing. There is not a thing you can do about these people, and you just have to love them, despite their intent. Banish memories of them after you brain storm it.

    If a person is over-weight, I certainly wouldn't hassle them about their weight. Just take it in stride.
  6. by   Flo1216
    Since we are talking about refusing stuff...I always remind myself of that. I saw a pt today refuse a med because she didn't know what it was or why she was getting it because she had never seen it before. The nurse just said, " OK " but she didn't tell her what the med was or why she needed it. So I said to her, " By the way, what is that med for?," She said, " I CAN"T REMEMBER" The pt also has a TLC(she didn't understand why) and the nurse was about to hang Rocephin and the pt said, " I don't want an antiobiotic..I don't need it ...I feel fine," And the nurse said , " OK" She never explained to the pt what the antiobiotic was for nor did she tell the pt what kind of infectious process she had. All she said was, " OK " I know I am getting off the subject but it bothered me.
  7. by   pebbles
    I agree, Flo. The basic respect of pt's rights means less in the long term if it isn't considered in the larger picture of their care and condition... following up on why is very important. Like people who refuse pain meds because they are afraid of addiction, etc.... A pt who refuses a weight can be dealt with in a more sensitive manner in the dr's office - but if a weight is really an important part of the assessment (and not just a routine formality)... it would be professional negligence to not follow up on why and what is going on with the pt.
  8. by   mario_ragucci
    You open a can of worms with this. I understand that Nurse also means Educator. Without the interest and knowledge of the PT, they will not grow or get better. I pity the PT's in bad positions just like I pity workers in bad positions.
    BTW-has anyone ever canned worms :-(
  9. by   Jas honey
    Hey I dreamt that I was weighing all my patients backwards in my clinic.....:chuckle
  10. by   monkijr
    Originally posted by Jas honey
    Hey I dreamt that I was weighing all my patients backwards in my clinic.....:chuckle
    Just curious, did they weigh the same?:chuckle
  11. by   prn nurse
    After wasting a chunk of my life reading this entire thread, all I can say is: I understand why, of all the medical professions, psychiatrists' are the #1 group committing suicide.
  12. by   LasVegasRN
    Originally posted by prn nurse
    After wasting a chunk of my life reading this entire thread, all I can say is: I understand why, of all the medical professions, psychiatrists' are the #1 group committing suicide.
    << Waiting patiently for Shay to hand me her purse >>
  13. by   prn nurse
    LOL

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