Eeekk!!Patients sexual needs???!!! - page 4

Hi,Im pretty new to all of this so PLEASE help me if you can.Im getting ready to take my exam to be a cna so I can be working while attending nursing school this Fall.I was browsing through my... Read More

  1. by   gwenith
    Quote from 3rdShiftGuy
    It's obviously not a need like food and water. I'm sure no one's died from lack of sex. But not having any kind of sexual release whatsoever, either with another person or by oneself, for long periods of times would drive a person a little batty don't you think. Kind of puts it in between a want and a need for me. :chuckle
    So THAT explains what is wrong with me!!:roll
  2. by   BRANDY LPN
    Quote from barefootlady
    Tweety, did it occur to you that this female patient was being abused again? She may not have had any choice. I know it could be embarrassing but did you take a few private moments, after the guy left to ask her about her choice in this matter? This happened to a patient on a unit at a trauma hospital near here, raped and beaten by husband at home, rushed to hospital, given care and admitted, husband shows up 2 days later, held her in bed and raped her again. The nurse who opened the door did not report anything unusual to charge nurse. The facility was sued and it was settled out of court. I know because it happened on the floor my buddy worked on and she was really upset and worried about what she would do if she were in this type of situation. Now, I am not saying this is what happened in your situation, but it does raise questions.
    This almost exactly what I was referring to in my earlier post, the husband was checking his wife out for weekends (at a LTC facility) and would bring her back with instructions to "clean her up" referring to his semen on her peri-area, the res. was not able to consent to this, and eventually he brought her back with severe vaginal injuries, and her breasts about chewed off. The autorities were called and the LTC investigated (along with the sick SOBing husband) for not bringing them in sooner when it was obvious she couldn't consent. I don't know the final outcome, because I got all this info. second hand.

    I also saw a res. who everyone assumed was having consensual sex with another res. report rape to the authorities herself when she couldn't live with it any more, and we had all just assumed since she didn't tell us and seemed to be willing that she was......very sad, it would have taken a few minutes to just ask her if everything was ok between her and so and so, and maybe she would have opened up sooner instead of just enduring it for several weeks.
  3. by   gslpro
    Quote from susanna
    i had a question pertaining to this on my CNA exam, to which I still do not know the right answer:
    Quote from susanna

    In a nursing home, you have found out that Mrs. X and Mr. Y, both residents who met in the LTC facility, are having a sexual relationship. You...

    A) Try to keep Mrs. X and Mr. Y in different activities and in different groups as much as possible.

    B) Inform the patients' families of this. They are paying for the stay and are thus legallly responsible.

    C) Understand that it is very important that older persons are sociable and make new friends and give them their privacy.

    And, I think the last one was,

    D) Tell your nursing supervisor immediately before anything else happens.


    --------------------------------------------------------------------
    Well, I am disagreeing with all of the (c) answers. The correct answer should actually be (d), both by law and by morals. First off, it is stated as Mrs. X and Mr. Y. Sounds like both are/were married to other people. As a CNA, there is no way in hell that you should be making a diagnosis on your own as to the mental and/or psychological condition of the patients. We have faced this many times, and it should be up to the Nursing Director, nursing supervisor or possibly a psychologist to decide whether this is an appropriate relationship.
    I know I sound sort of like a nut about this, but I have faced this situation many times, and found results on both sides of the issue. Mr. X was a widower, and sexually active. Mrs. Y was STILL married, but did not always remember. She would say that she wanted to be with Mr. X, until we informed her that it was not her husband. This then turned into her wanting to file assault charges against the other patient....It was a mess, and actually repeated itself a few times, before we finally transfered her out for her, and her husband's, dignity and safety.
    I guess that is my two cents.
    -Gary
  4. by   mariedoreen
    Quote from CHATSDALE
    I dont know about that nurse with 17 y/o considering the chest tube it may have been a correct decision but if there was no medical reason then this may have been wrong parents wishes are not usually considered with late teens they are almost grown and should be allowed to make own decisions
    OH you must be kidding me! LOL, I can assure you that if as a nurse you were aware that my 17 year old medically compromised daughter was engaged in sex in her room with some male and you simply smiled and placed a do not disturb sign on the door... because after all she's "almost grown"... I would be in your supervisor's office PRONTO with a "polite" request to have you severely reprimanded!
  5. by   Tweety
    Quote from barefootlady
    Tweety, did it occur to you that this female patient was being abused again? She may not have had any choice. I know it could be embarrassing but did you take a few private moments, after the guy left to ask her about her choice in this matter? This happened to a patient on a unit at a trauma hospital near here, raped and beaten by husband at home, rushed to hospital, given care and admitted, husband shows up 2 days later, held her in bed and raped her again. The nurse who opened the door did not report anything unusual to charge nurse. The facility was sued and it was settled out of court. I know because it happened on the floor my buddy worked on and she was really upset and worried about what she would do if she were in this type of situation. Now, I am not saying this is what happened in your situation, but it does raise questions.
    Your right, perhaps I was assuming too much. But the grin on face when she looked at me and I walked in said otherwise to me. But I shouldn't assume anything, I should have asked, or reported it to the social worker.

    Thanks for the input.
  6. by   caroladybelle
    Quote from mariedoreen
    OH you must be kidding me! LOL, I can assure you that if as a nurse you were aware that my 17 year old medically compromised daughter was engaged in sex in her room with some male and you simply smiled and placed a do not disturb sign on the door... because after all she's "almost grown"... I would be in your supervisor's office PRONTO with a "polite" request to have you severely reprimanded!
    I would hope that you would have taught your daughter to behave better than that. If you didn't, someone should be reprimanding YOU or HER, not the nurse.

    I have dealt with enough pregnant 14 year olds whose parents encourage "Daddy" staying with them to find that I can't enforce mine or society's morals on them. If their parents haven't managed to do so, it ain't gonna happen. And to expect nurses to do enforce some (unknown to them) moral code that you have daughter is ridiculous.
  7. by   caroladybelle
    Quote from 3rdShiftGuy
    Seriously, if your spouse was in the hospital would you have sex with him or her? Or if you were in the hospital, obviously having an acute problem of some sort would you feel like sex if propositioned by your spouse or s.o.?

    Why do people think it's o.k. to have sex with someone who is ill enough to be in the hospital? Baffles me.
    It depends on the situation.

    As an Onco/Hemo nurse, I have patients admitted because they feel tired, and because their blood counts are off. They are young and they appear healthy and they certainly don't feel sick. They will be in the hospital with AML for a few days of testing and then generally 4-7 weeks of induction. During that time, for about two weeks, they may feel wonderful. Then for 2-4 weeks feel nauseated, tired, deathly ill with fevers, chills, mouth sores so severe that they cannot swallow their own spit. They can easily die during this period.

    If they survive induction, there are some more rounds of Consolidation (not as severe) and then possibly BMT that could kill them, and can require 1-3 monthes in the hospital, mostly in protective isolation.

    They go from feeling "a little tired" to possibly dying at anytime, and deathly ill.

    If they need the comfort of a loved one during their healthy time, and that loved one knows the situation, how evil would I be to not permit that comfort?
  8. by   jeepgirl
    How many times on postpartum do we find dad cohearsing mom into having sex in a matter of hours after having a baby? Or, I guess it could be the other way around... but I've mostly heard that it's dad's idea....
    It's happened to me before during my clinical. I hear its a common occurance.
    Personally, I asked them to put on their clothes and then tried to explain to them why she definetly needed to wait the 6 weeks to have sex again. but why would anyone WANT to have sex that soon after having a baby? OUCH. jeez.

    Quote from LPN2Be2004
    As for the answer to the question, that would be C.


    As for people in the hospital, who seem to think that it's fine and dandy to act like the hospital bed is their bedroom, i say no. If you're in here for a lappy appy, you're going home in a few days, you can wait till you get home to scratch your itch. It's a roayl pain in the rear to have to ask some dude's g/f to get out of the bed because she keeps laying on his chest tube/IV tube, etc. Not to mention that the person asked to move is usually all cranky and ticked off. Well, honey, he's the pt., not you.

    I could see it if someone's in pain, or scared, or dying, but it's gotten downright ridiculous lately.
  9. by   Blackcat99
    Quote from txspadequeen921
    Let me tell you I am a nurse at a long term care facility.And several years ago I had a man and woman ( not married ) having sex 3 times a day after meals( just like desert) . Both of the families consented (alzheimers) and I was required by law to give them privacy. However I was requested by the womans familiy to "PEEK" in and just make sure he wasent raping her. GET REAL, she was the one dragging him down the hall to the room. This went on for weeks and weeks then one day (no lie) she fell off the bed, then they both got infections because they were incont of B&B. GO FIGURE I said this in the begining they have no buisness having sex, not because of their age or living arrangments. THEY ARE BOTH INCONT, and the lady became septic and died. Now, did the familiy understand that she was septic and needed to recover ,NO they did not . But this nurse stopped the whole deal, and I got a doctors order to cover that but GEEEZ. After that I deserved a gold medal...:uhoh21: :imbar
    :chuckle Good grief! I hope you did get a gold medal!!! You earned it.
  10. by   Lys
    Hey all!

    Everyone has brought up some great points about this topic (I too work in LTC and we've had sexually active residents, both widowed and competent though).

    I'd like to bring another spin to this though. In my view, as nurses we have the opportunity to help with the entire health of an individiual or family - not just physical. I believe that sexuality is an important part of an individuals' health - mostly mental, but sometimes physical. I'm not saying that we need to be allowing pt's who are in hospital to have sexual relations in a semi-private room...but that we need to be sensitive to the issues for the clients.

    Examples: discharge instructions for PP mom's should include teaching regarding return to sexual activity (we KNOW she was sexually active prior to admission, so why ignore the fact, esp. when it's medically pertinent?)
    Same goes for the 17 y.o with a chest tube...teaching should include *anything* that can increase thoracic pressure, i.e. constipation, sexual activity...etc.
    When doing a health history on a girl, asking only if she has a boyfriend. If the answer is no, an internal/pap may not be performed. What if she's having casual sex with guys and/or girls? What if she has engaged in oral? Still sexually active IMHO.

    *gets down off of soapbox*

    Great topic
  11. by   Daddoo1
    As bad as the whole thing may sound to you at this time, the answer is C. When sexual relations is between two consentual (single, widowed) adults, there is really nothing wrong with it as long as the couple is being discreet and not voyeuristic. Always knock and wait for a reply (for an appropriate amount of time) or invitation to come in to a resident's room.
  12. by   Rick-Wood
    Quote from susanna
    i had a question pertaining to this on my CNA exam, to which I still do not know the right answer:

    In a nursing home, you have found out that Mrs. X and Mr. Y, both residents who met in the LTC facility, are having a sexual relationship. You...

    A) Try to keep Mrs. X and Mr. Y in different activities and in different groups as much as possible.

    B) Inform the patients' families of this. They are paying for the stay and are thus legallly responsible.

    C) Understand that it is very important that older persons are sociable and make new friends and give them their privacy.

    And, I think the last one was,

    D) Tell your nursing supervisor immediately before anything else happens.
    The immediate correct answer is "rather obviously" C. Give them the important space and privacy.

    So much of what we deal with in long-term care is the terminal boredom our residents face. The sing-alongs and magic shows and stand-up commedians alleviate some boredom. The exercise and recreational aides do a lot too. But we are social beings, and as social beings we need human touch. Often those human touches are sexual, but they are not any less important than the non-sexual ones. Also, people do not lose their sex nor their sexuality just because they are now in LTC.

    We are socialized to be ashamed of some areas and some activities. However, it is the same body, and as nurses we usually get some inkling that a genital region is anatomical area, as is the face. We don't think twice about helping a patient brush teeth, but we think twice and often balk at helping wash or washing genitals. It's social; in places women cover their face but expose breasts and genitals to the air, the boys masturbate to mental images of girls' noses. <shrug>

    I would also, right after the "C" intervention, explore "D". I think the staff needs to be clued in to the fact that these two are having a relationship some others might not understand, and perhaps permit them time together behind closed doors to explore each other's hearts and souls in the ways I think we all want to with those we love.

    If there were overtures between patient/resident/client and nurse/nursing assistant/caregiver, it may be a different story -- at that point conflict of interest and emotional attachments could lead to major problems. That is not the situation queried on the test, however.

    This has been probably a reiteration of advice already given, so I shuddup now.

    Rick Wood, LVN
  13. by   kids
    Quote from susanna
    In a nursing home, you have found out that Mrs. X and Mr. Y, both residents who met in the LTC facility, are having a sexual relationship. You...

    A) Try to keep Mrs. X and Mr. Y in different activities and in different groups as much as possible.

    B) Inform the patients' families of this. They are paying for the stay and are thus legallly responsible.

    C) Understand that it is very important that older persons are sociable and make new friends and give them their privacy.

    D) Tell your nursing supervisor immediately before anything else happens.
    Nursing Assistants: D
    Licensed Nurses: C (but the Nursing Supervisor needs to also be notified)

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