DUI's & Licensure - page 6

OK Here goes. Ten years ago I got two DUI's. Now I'm pretty sure that those two won't affect me with licensure as long as I petition the boards effectively. Just yesterday I found out that I was... Read More

  1. by   caroladybelle
    Originally posted by sbn8tv
    This is getting way too wierd for me. I won't be posting anymore but I just have a couple questions for all you who asume that I am some kind of monster because I got a 3rd DUI in ten years. Do any of you smoke? Do you know the statistics on that? Do you come down this hard on people who do?

    Peace
    I was so going to stay out of this..but...

    Excuse me, you know that you have a "drinking" gene, How? Were you tested? Or do you know from your experience? If you know from experience, don't drink. And if you drink - so much as a sip of wine, beer or alcohol - DON'T DRIVE.

    NO EXCEPTIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    During this thread, I have seen a lot of excuses:
    - I have this gene
    - I haven't done this in a long time.
    - It was a holiday.
    - I don't drink that much.
    - It was just this once.
    - I haven't done it again (in the last week!)
    - It's not as bad as smoking.
    - You are just being mean, you all do things, etc.

    And the main focus, is how do I keep this from affecting my life too much?

    Well, you need desperately for this to affect your life, NOW!!!!! Because if it doesn't, you will be getting in a lot more trouble soon.

    Life as a nurse is full of stress, lots and lots of stress. Life as a nurse is also very unfair, frequently. And excuses will not cut it there. It doesn't matter how unfair and stressful it is, you MUST be able to function well in all situations and learn from your mistakes. And if you didn't learn from the first DUI and if you didn't learn from the second DUI .... knowing full well the cost, very few people are going to have Faith that this one will teach you.

    You need to step back and take some counseling on why you are doing this - a year or two at least - or you will repeat this pattern. And as a nurse, too many lives are hanging in the balance. I worry about you feeling the stress and using these excuses to reach for the bottle. And I believe that the Board is going to worry about that, too.

    You are not a monster - you have one on your back. And you need to get it off your back before even thinking about being a nurse. And it doesn't matter what genes that you have, or how your homelife is, or how long since your last drink was, or how little that you think that you drink, etc.

    You must never put the car keys in your hand within 18 hours of having a sip of alcohol.

    As an aside, as several of the members here know, I have autoimmune disease and depression. I take several meds that do not mix well with alcohol. I accept that if so much as a sip of alcohol (toasts at oneg-religious service or with dinner), I cannot drive - NO EXCEPTIONS. This is very inconvenient at times. I accept this as my price for being a healthy, functional, responsible individual. Being a healthy nurse requires this of me. And if you wish to be a responsible nurse, you may find that you must prove that your behavior has changed.

    And I most certainly dislike smoking and yes, I avoid them. But they are not likely to kill someone by being behind the wheel, of a car. And therein lies a big difference.
  2. by   passing thru
    3rd shift: All drunk driving deaths are preventable.

    Caroladybelle: My opinion; your excellent & simple advice
    is too intelligent for the poster. It's not what she is
    wants to hear.
  3. by   Tweety
    passing thru, I agree. I wasn't arguing that point. Just that I found the original poster neither humble or arrogant, just insane with the disease.

    caroladybelle, awesome post!
  4. by   nursenoelle
    caroladybelle- very well said.
  5. by   rebelwaclause
    (Psssst....I think this thread was started to shake-up our feathers. This Grand Puba of DUI's CANNOT be serious!)
  6. by   nursenoelle
    DOH! Ya gotta point there Reb- OP has not returned.....
  7. by   sbn8tv
    Uhm- Did you call me the grand puba? That is quite a strong statement. You people need to realize that I am neither female nor insane with any kind of disease. I am a proud man of 34 from San Diego. Noelle - Please accept my apologies for anything I've done to you personallyand also for my silly blatherings. I know you are in a bad place. Also - Passing thru - ...Dude that is some whacked stuff that you've seen. However I am not any kind of DUI machine that just jumps in a car after a hard night of Tequila Shots and Wild Turkey. I have scruples. I know I screwed up. All I was doing here is asking for some information. If you people are hurting for a target why don't you go to your nearest bar and watch how many asswipes get in the car and drive home. It's an epidemic for christs sake. Don't feed off me just because I chose to post here. I guarantee that if you go to dinner and drink three glasses of wine you could get a DUI but does that make you a bad person? I don't think so.

    I have a friend who was very athletic. He had it all going for him. He was a Hockey Referree. He was on his way from Santa Barbara to San Diego to ref a game when someone fell asleep at the wheel and crossed the median. The car jumped up and rolled over and landed on my friend. It killed him instantly. This affected everyone I know. It wasn't alcohol related it was sleep deprivation related but it still sucked.

    I ain't tryin to make excuses. I'm just tired of hearing all you silly ninny's trying to make me feel bad for getting a DUI. I paid my dues and I will again. You should pay attention to yourselves and your families. Keep them safe. I don't really care what you say about me because I know the truth. I just had to come back and reply because I love a good intellectual debate.

    "Deaths caused by smoking are six times higher than the 20,170 deaths arising from: road accidents (3,444); poisoning and overdose (2,663); other accidental deaths (8,986); murder and manslaughter (503); suicide (4,379); and HIV infection (195) in the US during 1998.[8] World-wide, about 4 million die prematurely each year as a result of smoking. Based on current trends, this will rise to 10 million a year by 2030.[9]"

    Stats from http://www.ash.org.uk/html/factsheets/html/fact02.html

    http://www.americanheart.org/present...dentifier=4559

    so lets hear the end of it.

    SBN8TV
  8. by   itsme
    sbn8tv, I think you are missing the point. People are concerned and think you should seek help for drinking. They arent trying to be mean. We just dont want to see you in an avoidable accident that ends up hurting you or someone else. In WI with a DUI, they are required to have an alcohol assessment and go to classes, etc. The fine for a 1st time offender is like around 6 or 7 hundred dollars. Maybe you dont have a drinking problem, but there does seem to be a problem with driving once yo have been drinking. Isnt there someone who can be a designated driver? Truly, you dont want to get in an accidnet while drunk, or legally intoxicated, that would be something to definatly screw up your whole life, not to mention someone elses life too! I graduated from high school with someone who wiped out an entire young family on xmas eve while he was legally intoxicated, he is still in prison. It isnt worth it to drive if you have been drinking, the roads are dangerous enough when you are sober!!
  9. by   caroladybelle
    Originally posted by sbn8tv
    However I am not any kind of DUI machine that just jumps in a car after a hard night of Tequila Shots and Wild Turkey. I have scruples. I know I screwed up. All I was doing here is asking for some information. It's an epidemic for christs sake. Don't feed off me just because I chose to post here. I guarantee that if you go to dinner and drink three glasses of wine you could get a DUI but does that make you a bad person? I don't think so.

    I ain't tryin to make excuses. I'm just tired of hearing all you silly ninny's trying to make me feel bad for getting a DUI. I paid my dues and I will again. You should pay attention to yourselves and your families. Keep them safe. I don't really care what you say about me because I know the truth. I just had to come back and reply because I love a good intellectual debate.

    so lets hear the end of it.

    SBN8TV
    You asked for information and you got it. I regret that you don't like the information that you got, but you indeed did ask for it.

    The reason that it is an epidemic is because of people that refuse to seek the cure, but are looking for the easy way out. And there is no easy way out.

    If I have 3 glasses of wine with dinner, I am going to get a DUI? If you read the posts, you would know that if I drink, I don't drive. PERIOD.

    AND IF YOU DON"T DRIVE AFTER DRINKING, YOU CAN BE PRETTY DARN SURE THAT YOU WILL NOT GET A DUI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Also, what law says that you have to drink 3 glasses of wine with dinner. Where is that rule??? Or that you have to drive?

    If you truly were a man with scruples, as you have stated, and you have a burning desire to be a nurse, you would realize that the goal requires a sacrifice. And those scruples and that goal require that you not drink and drive. I personally would love to smoke marijuana occasionally - I can argue that it hurts no one. But as a nurse, I get drug tested on a regular basis and that requires me as a responsible nurse to never touch illegal drugs. And that is part of the price that I pay to be a good nurse.

    You tell us to keep are families safe and look after ourselves - well I guess that means keeping people like you off the roads, since you have no ability to control yourself with all your scruples.

    And if you feel that we are ninnies, I just wonder where you are going to work that doesn't have ninnies just like us............
  10. by   Tweety
    "If you people are hurting for a target why don't you go to your nearest bar and watch how many asswipes get in the car and drive home. It's an epidemic for christs sake."

    Typical alcholic behavior diverting attention to others. I suppose you're an asswipe too, since you did exactly that.

    " I'm just tired of hearing all you silly ninny's trying to make me feel bad for getting a DUI............... love a good intellectual debate. "

    Calling us silly ninny's is no intelllectual debate my friend.

    If you think we are bad, wait until you have to answer to the state board of nursing for getting the one DUI that you have. I have a coworker who is going through quite a bit for getting a DUI in his past when he tried to become a LPN. The silly ninnys of the board of nursing don't play.

    We all make mistakes. Some horrible, terrible excuriating mistakes that can't be redone. I commend you for not trying to live in the past. Sooner or later we have to forgive ourselves and move on. But you've been minimizing it, and that's what is angering some of us.
    Last edit by Tweety on Jul 12, '03
  11. by   Tweety
    sorry for the double post.
  12. by   geekgolightly
    I spoke with a clinical instructor the other day about situations like this. She said that a former student of hers, a male, had a history of DUI's...two from when he was in his early twenties and the board approved him for the NCLEX. he received a DUI a month after he graduated and reported this to the board and since then, and this has been three years, the board each year has told him, "seek counseling from an approved counselor," and he has, and each year they turn him down adn say, "better do some more counseling."

    The instructor informed me that the board never has to say no. They can string him along like that until he gives up.

    What I am saying is, you could spend the next few years struggling through nursing school and be "clean" that entire time, but I don't think it would matter at this point. They won't ever let him practice nursing because of a proven record of repeated negative behaviors.

    I have heard a few times from you now that three DUI's in ten years are not bad odds. I wonder what then, bad odds are for you. I would assume that bad odds would be one time. In a lifetime. But this would mean that someone never makes the decision to drink and drive and therefore can not be caught drinking and driving. I think that those odds don;t seem bad to you ebcause the rate at which you get behind a car drunk and drive is exponentially higher than that of which any of us would consider to be normal. normal means none. Do you understand this? It might be that none seems unreasonable to you, and that would be more indicitive of your mindframe than that of ours.

    I am a teetotaler. yes, I am. As are many people in this profession. Maybe you should consider another profession if this mindframe is so alien to you. The more I read your responses, the more I glean that you are far too defensive to ever see clearly what your situation looks like to the rest of the world (that being the non-getting-in-a-car-while-drunk world).

    When I was younger I did get in a car and drive while drunk, and i feel horrible about it now, ten or so years later, and am thankful that I never hurt anyone. I can;t imagine now, in my thirties, ever behaving so recklessly. I was a completely different person back then. I am ashamed of who I was. I am greatful I had the sense to sober up.

    In ten years, you might see this too, if you remain abstinent. I hope this happens.

    Good luck to you.
  13. by   jacolaur
    SBN8tv...I really have tried to find something in your posts that shows me that you are truly trying to face this dilemma of yours. I think you are probably a very likable and, obviously, intelligent guy. No one here is trying to throw darts and strike you down from a dream of a future in nursing. You asked for advice, when the advice was supportive and easy you were excited making lists and taking action. However; when the advice became tougher, which takes more time and commitment on your part, you become upset, defensive, and developed an everybodies picking on me attitude. This makes it even more obvious to me that you have more work to do before you jump into nursing school. YOU got yourself into this big mess, You should have the strenghth to suck it up and get yourself mentally healthy and strong again the right way, not the most convenient way. It takes more than a file of a few phone calls, letters, and pee tests to get over your problem. Reach down deep inside yourself to answer the question why do I have 3 DUI's? Stop making excuses and throwing the blame everywhere else but on yourself. Get into a self help program, stay clean and sober, go to therapy (many times) and prove to yourself (which will prove to all around you)that you are emotionaly ready. Wait list yourself, when you have all the documentation that this DUI, and any chance of another, is far far behind you (with no chance of it ever happening again) then go to the school and board of nursing for their support and blessings to engage in this dream. Playing lip service and nicey nice is not enough. This career is so demanding and emotionally draining that for your own sake, as well as the lives of those you are responsible for, be healthy and stable or your setting yourself up for disaster. Sorry if your angry but, you asked for this boards advice and this is what I feel.

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