Originally posted by sunnygirl272
...daughter has been pleasant and well-behaved since being grounded...does anyonew know what signs of crack withdrawal are? she has not noticed anything other than sleeping more and being pleasant and human...
Well, never look a gift horse in the mouth. She might be just "doing well" but crack cocaine is highly addicting and she _will_ have urges again. Like Heather says, she may well need help to get past this.
In AA, they use a term "white knuckling". It means the person is either saying, "I don't have a problem I can't walk away from any time," or "I can whip this thing by myself," so they go into this super-good, hanging onto sobriety for dear life, denial of all problems (craving? who? me?) and just try to "be good". But it's like trying to hang onto a spinning object against high centrifugal force and, in spite of hanging on so hard they have "white knuckles", they fly off. People can put on a pretty "peaceful face" when they're doing this, but underneath you can sense their desperateness and that they are literally planning their "relapse". I would still encourage NA until and after she gets in treatment.
My step daughter learned so much in her treatment program which she did not complete AND her outpatient psych day program (for her severe drug related depression) which she did complete but what helped her the most to 2 years and 8 months of sobriety is AA. Truthfully, she needed all of the tools she gleaned from treatment, psych treatment and AA. Her first group of AA friends here was not the strongest group in town but they showed her friendship and acceptance and did some good beginning confrontation of her behaviors. They really helped her adapt AA as a life style. Her first group, which is the group the local treatment agency brought their clients to, was wary and careful of newcomers, knew alot of them weren't "there" yet, and had a good mix of very long term and mid term sobriety members as well as lots of newcomers. Going to AA group wasn't a real feel good experience from the very beginning. What kept her going is that it was a condition of staying with us and her outpatient day program. Through that group, she became acquainted with other groups and found her current group, which is a solid core of support; people who care about her and confront her lovingly about what she needs to work on next. She returns the favor.
AA. Your own kid in AA. They come home from meetings smelling smoky. Nod to weird looking people at the mall. Talk recovery talk (though she's really not a vocal zealot). It's not an entirely comfortable fit. But, because she was willing to do it, it worked. For your friend, I mentioned encouraging meetings as a condition of staying at their house. I would encourage this. She (the daughter) will lapse. Stepdaughter has experienced lapses, the last being 2 y 8 m ago. Her lapses were ALWAYS followed by being dropped off at meetings, the next day when she was sober. It was her best shot at not getting sucked into the maelstrom.
Good luck to your friend.