Do you think your manager likes you? - page 4

I don't think mine likes me. I am not a butt kisser at all, and I don't gossip or tattle. I rarely can work extra shifts either due to childcare issues. Also, she had a complaint on me from a... Read More

  1. Visit  leslie :-D profile page
    1
    Quote from Pooksmom1996
    This is the part of your post, Lily,that jumped out at me:

    "My manager never speaks to me when she passes me in the hall, etc."


    My read on this: That is rude, and is not appropriate behavior on your manager's part.

    Pooksmom
    i'll tell you, i would take notice if my nm said the absolute minimum to me while obviously friendly/laughing w/other nurses.
    sometimes personalities just don't mesh.
    hope this works out for you, lily.

    leslie
    Magsulfate likes this.
  2. Visit  MultipRN profile page
    1
    I honestly don't know whether my mgr. likes me or not. At this point, the only reason I care is I want to have plenty of options should I move and need to find another job.

    Other than that, I must say it's nice to work night shift. We don't have to see her except at staff meetings. She's not a great manager -- a little too inexperienced and young, IMHO. The less I am on her radar, the better. :-)
    netglow likes this.
  3. Visit  loricatus profile page
    2
    If your manager's attitude concerns you, why don't you just ask to meet with her privately (before or after a shift, or during a break) and discuss it with her?

    I would leave out the words 'like me' in the conversation and use something more professional, such as "I get the impression that you are dissatified with my performance and would like to discuss it so that we can foster a better working relationship"

    BTW, I now have a manger from hell. This manager has mental issues but is a primo butt kisser; so, has a secure job. Not only is the manager a dangerous nurse (regarding patient care), this manager has volatile outbursts at staff right next to a patient bedside and uses the fear and intimidation philosophy of management. And, I know for a fact that this manager does not like me one bit. Yet, we do pretend to have a civil working relationship (in between the outbursts). Liking each other really has nothing to do with fostering a working relationship, it is just an added bonus when it occurs in the workplace.
    JB2007 and netglow like this.
  4. Visit  DeLanaHarvickWannabe profile page
    1
    My current manager used to be my former assistant manager. She hired me without interviewing me, then changed my schedule because I didn't want a rotating schedule. So, yes, she likes me. I agree that it made the difference when it came to me getting this job over others. But she likes me because she used to work with me and knew I would be a welcomed addition to the midnight shift because of my work. We are friendly toward each other, but I don't think I was hired because I'm nice or because I'm her friend. She knew my work was quality.

    I don't think, ultimately, if she didn't like me, my work experience would suffer for it. Maybe it's because I work midnights and therefore rarely, if ever, see her. I've had bosses dislike me before, but whatever, I did my work and didn't let it affect my performance.
    JB2007 likes this.
  5. Visit  miko014 profile page
    2
    I guess it doesn't make a difference who the manager likes, as long as they treat everyone fairly. When the "in crowd" starts to get perks that others don't get, that's when it has gone too far.

    My manager definitely crosses the lines of the boss-employee relationship sometimes, but she has worked with some of the nurses on my floor for over 20 years, and they were friends before she got the manager job. She's definitely unconventional about the way she runs things. We always joke that we are a great big dysfunctional family. But hey, it works for us I guess. There is a lot of yipping and back-stabbing that goes on around my floor, some directed at the manager. We had a big problem awhile back with her playing favorites, and the truth is that she didn't realize she was doing it. She works really hard now to make sure that she doesn't, and I think that for the most part she is pretty fair.

    All that being said, I used to think she hated me, but she didn't. Does she love me? Maybe not. But I'm pretty sure she likes me. ...But then, what's not to like??? j/k j/k!!!
    netglow and pagandeva2000 like this.
  6. Visit  MultipRN profile page
    1
    Quote from miko014
    I guess it doesn't make a difference who the manager likes, as long as they treat everyone fairly. When the "in crowd" starts to get perks that others don't get, that's when it has gone too far.
    This describes our unit perfectly. There is definitely an "in crowd" who are better treated than others -- of a very small group of nurses. Our manager is very young, and hardly had to do any floor work at all before getting her position (it was who she knew). It's aggravating, to say the least. It has gone too far, but there doesn't seem to be any change on the horizon since administration completely backs her (again, she's in because of connections).
    netglow likes this.
  7. Visit  Magsulfate profile page
    1
    Quote from MultipRN
    I honestly don't know whether my mgr. likes me or not. At this point, the only reason I care is I want to have plenty of options should I move and need to find another job.

    Other than that, I must say it's nice to work night shift. We don't have to see her except at staff meetings. She's not a great manager -- a little too inexperienced and young, IMHO. The less I am on her radar, the better. :-)
    Several years ago, my very good friend was a 'young icu manager'. She was 26 and managing a rather large ICU. She was wonderful. She had to work 5 times harder than any other manager in that position BECAUSE she was so young. The hospital that she was at never really acknowledged her hard work and would not promote her. So, she went on to greener pastures. After several years and many promotions, that same hospital called her back, they wanted her to take a CCO position. I guess she aged enough by then for them to promote her. But, my point is, young managers are sometimes the VERY BEST because they have to work hard to prove themselves.


    On to the "hello" in the hallway thing........... Maybe it is just the culture in my hospital, but everyone says hello and smiles when they walk by each other in the hallway. I mean, we even do it to the patient's and families too! It just makes for a better atmosphere.
    netglow likes this.
  8. Visit  Tweety profile page
    0
    Quote from easttexasnurse31
    On to the "hello" in the hallway thing........... Maybe it is just the culture in my hospital, but everyone says hello and smiles when they walk by each other in the hallway. I mean, we even do it to the patient's and families too! It just makes for a better atmosphere.
    I've read in cultural nursing articles, and elsewhere, and have observed that American culture as a whole really doesn't do this. It's customary to look straight ahead, not meet their eyes, and not speak to people, particularly strangers when passing in the hallway. I've noticed it seems to be more prevalent in this part of Florida (where most people are from the Northern states) than when I lived in North Carolina, but Southerners do it too. It bugs me a little bit, particularly when it's someone I know to see them walk past me, but I don't get bothered. I do think that if a manager wants to build a cohesive unit with good morale she would try to be more friendly.
  9. Visit  MultipRN profile page
    0
    Quote from easttexasnurse31
    Several years ago, my very good friend was a 'young icu manager'. She was 26 and managing a rather large ICU. She was wonderful. She had to work 5 times harder than any other manager in that position BECAUSE she was so young. The hospital that she was at never really acknowledged her hard work and would not promote her. So, she went on to greener pastures. After several years and many promotions, that same hospital called her back, they wanted her to take a CCO position. I guess she aged enough by then for them to promote her. But, my point is, young managers are sometimes the VERY BEST because they have to work hard to prove themselves.
    You are right. There are some very young managers who do very well. Our manager just isn't one of them. She is known for putting off her work on other people and treating us poorly in the process. She's set the tone for very poor morale on our unit. I have met young managers who are the opposite of her -- and appreciate that there are those who are naturals at the job, while others shouldn't be given such a role.
  10. Visit  Jules A profile page
    0
    this is a really good thread. yes my nm likes me because i work like a dog, never call out and will most often pick up extra shifts. :icon_roll not being a martyr its just the way i work but i'm also not flattering myself to think he would like me as much if i started slacking. personalities are a funny thing but i'm glad that things are smooth at my job. if not i'd probably leave that is just too much added stress on top of an already difficult job.
  11. Visit  truern profile page
    0
    Quote from easttexasnurse31
    On to the "hello" in the hallway thing........... Maybe it is just the culture in my hospital, but everyone says hello and smiles when they walk by each other in the hallway. I mean, we even do it to the patient's and families too! It just makes for a better atmosphere.
    We even have a name for it: The Wake Way!!

    We're to go out of our way to greet patients, families, and visitors...and yes, each other
  12. Visit  ghillbert profile page
    0
    I can honestly say that my manager is a good friend. We have a small department, and almost everyone gets on very well.

    Rudeness does annoy me though - I hate when people walk by without saying hello. Nothing to stop you starting the contact though. Killing people with kindness is usually a good way to deal with it.
  13. Visit  pagandeva2000 profile page
    2
    I try to stay away from the managers at all cost, so I don't get a hint of how they feel. I do keep up with trends that they focus on so I don't stand out like a sore thumb, but I really try to stay out of the radar.
    Jules A and netglow like this.

Need Help Searching For Someone's Comment? Enter your keywords in the box below and we will display any comment that matches your keywords.



Nursing Jobs in every specialty and state. Visit today and find your dream job.

A Big Thank You To Our Sponsors
Top
close
close