Dear Nurse Manager

[Ruby Vee]

Dear Nurse Manager:

My last day is tomorrow, and I'm leaving this institution after 13 years on the unit. You have elected not to give me an exit interview and have accepted the "official story" that I'm leaving for family reasons. I wish you had heeded my requests to meet with you to discuss the real reason for my resignation; I can only conclude that you don't care why.

There are two major reasons, and the buck stops with you for both.

The first reason is that there are no benefits for seniority here. Yes, we get more vacation time, but unless we dribble it away on low census days, there's no opportunity to use it. Senior staff gets no preference on vacation requests -- I just have to submit my request and hope for the best along with the newbie who isn't even off orientation yet. My last several requests have been denied, and I'm tired of that. Senior staff gets no preference in attending educational conferences, classes, etc. That's decided by "lottery" with the Assistant nurse manager's best friends always seeming to win the lottery. I don't get my first choice of holidays off, and I work the exact same number of holidays as the newbie who came off orientation last month. There is a lot of time, money and energy spent on recruiting new staff, but not a cent spent on retention. I've just figured out why. Perhaps it has something to do with the statement you made at the staff meeting that anyone who stays in the same unit for a decade or more is just plain mediocre.

I tried to be a good employee and "take up the slack" for "the good of the unit." When you didn't have enough charge nurses to cover every shift, you asked me to orient to charge to cover a couple of shifts a month. So I did. And when I asked for access to the charge nurse email list, staff phone numbers and certifications that every charge nurse has access to, I was told, "You're not really a charge nurse, so we can't give that to you. But the next time we open up a charge position, you'll be at the top of the list." Silly me. I believed you. So for two years, I did relief charge whenever it was convenient for you. And then you opened up three charge nurse positions and encouraged me to apply. "We have a new process," you said. "I think everyone will like it. Charge nurse applicants submit their resume, an essay about why they want to do charge and why they think they're qualified, and there's an interview with the management team and with the staff." So I applied. I submitted my resume and my essay and went through two long interviews when I should have been home trying to recover from pneumonia. Three charge nurses were hired, and none of them was me. You hired the assistant nurse manager's best friend who had been out of school for two years, and another good friend who had been out of school for four. And you hired the best friend of two of the charge nurses who were on the interview committee. The assistant nurse manager hand picked everyone on that committee except for one experienced nurse who bulldozed her way onto the committee and was then ignored when it came time to discuss the candidates. (She's the one who told me that everyone except her knew before the discussion even started who was going to get the three jobs. And she was outvoted and angry.) Not nearly as angry as I am.

After two years of doing the job without the title, after being told frequently that I was doing a good job and never being told I was doing anything wrong, and after being encouraged to apply for the position, three people got hired before I did. That stinks. That really stinks. I feel like I've been slapped in the face. And that, dear manager is why I am leaving. I know you don't really care why I'm leaving, but you will. It seems that my husband socializes with YOUR boss's husband . . . .

And I can't wait to be out of here!

[LadyNASDAQ]

I disagree that you should have had an exit interview. This is because you could have possibly worked out the problems and then you would decide if you wanted to stay or not. I am seeing that there are some inferences that you may have wanted to stay unless I am incorrect and then I will apologize for this.

What I do want to emphasize is that the whole Nursing industry is changing and not all benefits us. This is important to be aware of.

[AndiMac]

Now I understand why I was told it helped to know someone to be able to get your foor in the door ...

They always manage to run off the best by doing favors for their "friends" ...

Just remember what's going to happen when they realize they can't replace you ... or they can't fins someone to come in to pick up the slack and they have to stay themselves ... revenge can be sweet

[SmilingBluEyes]

Onward and Upward.

if you intend to send this letter, good for you. If it's a vent , I appreciate that ...you deserve better. I hope you find this.

Onward and Upward, my friend.

[jnette, ASN, EMT-I]

You deserve better. And you'll find it.

They, too, will get what they deserve. What goes 'round, comes 'round.

Their loss, your gain. (((HUGS)))

[BarbPick]

People forget that this is a business, even though nursing you see the same people day in and day out.

After the amount of time that was spent in one job, your next employer will be thrilled to have a person with such dedication in their employ. All the expereince you bring to the next facility will be their benefit. And nursing wisdom to boot.

Your new prospective employer will appreciate your expereince and hire you without even asking personal questions about you. They way people sue these days, all an HR department will do is verify employment on either side. Maybe they will ask if you are eligable for rehire, but even that is a risky question.

I believe your time is far to precious to waste on an exit interview.

Spend it with your new position, the one who will look at your application and say wow, this Nurse stayed 14 years. She is a dedicated Nurse, we are lucky to have her now.

Barbara

[flashpoint]

I hope that you do intend to actaully give this letter to your nurse manager. Your letter is one that needs to be sent to many nurse managers out there. A lot of the probelms you outlines are common to other hospitals and LTCs. I wonder how much nurses' lives would improve if more were focused on retaining old nurses than gaining new ones.

I've been at my hospital for almost six years. There are only four nurses who have been there longer than I have. Those of us who have been there th elongest are often overlooked when continuing education opportunities come up. None of us were hired with a sign on bonus, none of us got a six month retention bonus, none of us talked the hospital into buying our scrubs, giving us free meals in the cafeteria, etc...sigh.

[Ruby Vee, BSN]

A little update:

I'm out of my job now, and have accepted a traveling assignment 3000 miles from here. I had my exit interview, and unlike what it seems most people do, I told the nice folks in personnel exactly why I was leaving. I pretty much outlined the facts of my original post. But before I did that, I called a little meeting with the assistant nurse manager who rigged the charge nurse selection process.

The "feedback" he gave me was that I didn't get the job because of the reason I gave in the interview. You know the one: what personality traits or aspects of your practice are you working on? Everyone has to come up with something. That's what Bob used as the reason I wasn't given the job. He told me that I had always done an excellent job at charge, and that he had recieved a lot of positive feedback.

I told him that I could understand not getting the position had they hired someone more experienced, more educated, more senior -- more QUALIFIED than me, but that wasn't the case. And furthermore, in the month since the decision was made, no one from management has approached me to tell me ANYTHING. I was expected perhaps a thank you for doing relief charge, for teaching all the device classes, for precepting devices and dialysis, for publishing and article that made the unit look really good . . . but none of that happened. In fact, he usually found an exciuse to turn around and go in the opposite direction every time he saw me coming.

In the end, he apologized, and said he didn't want me to leave. "I am leaving," I told him, "And this is why."

The next day, I had the same conversation with my manager, who told me she'd been "too busy" over the last month to approach me and talk to me about any of this. In fact, she had been so busy that she blew off the two appointments I had made to talk to her. I told her exactly why I was leaving using factual and professional terms as much as possible, but laying it all right out there.

"I'm angry. And that's why I'm leaving. I didn't get the job, and I should have expected that given that it's always been a popularity contest. That in itself is wrong. But the way you and the rest of the management team have treated me since is just plain shameful."

And then I went AROUND her and arranged my own exit interview. (The management team had never mentioned an exit interview to me, and when I brought it up said it was "optional" but they'd arrange it if I wanted them to. And then they put their coats on and left the hospital.)

During my exit interview, I again told the exact reasons I was leaving as calmly and as factually as I could. There were a lot of sighs and pregnant pauses.

My husband went directly to the top for HIS exit interview and again, told the exact truth. I have a feeling that there may be some changes made as a result of my experience. The upper-management nurses all know my husband and like him. Although few of them know ME, they weren't happy to lose HIM, and even less happy to realize that they were losing two experienced nurses because of the actions of one unit's management team. I rather wish we were going to be around to see the fall-out, but I suspect that other experienced nurses may get more respect because we did the right thing.