Coworker was fired yesterday.

One of my coworkers was fired yesterday. She had been put on suspension a few times and she had been sent to counseling because she has a tendancy to make rude comments to patients. She once told a patient who had been incontinent of stool several times that she was making baby like messes. The patient started to cry and she then told the patient that not only did she poop like a baby, but she cried like one too. The patient died the nest day and the family was devastated that her comment was one of the last things said to their loved one before she became unconscious and went dramatically downhill. She'd had several patients complain about her attitude and that they felt like they were troubling her every time they put their call light on. She also had a habit of pushing a lot of her work off on the CNAs, while she sat and read the newspaper, etc. She'd been talked to about that habit several times. Saturday, she had another patient who had been up to the commode several times. This 98 year old woman had never been in the hospital in her entire life and she'd only been sick enough to see a doctor a few times. The nurse told the patient that if she needed the commode one more time she was going to "stick a plug in her hole so the nurses could get some real work done." The patient was devastated by the comment and the patient's son was ready to kill the nurse. The patient didn't put her call light on for the rest of the shift and the next shift found her in tears with stool and urine everywhere. I don't really know why the family didn't report this to the charge nurse or request another nurse or something. Yesterday, the family called the nurse manager to complain and the nurse was fired soon after. She'd been warned a few weeks ago that if she had any more patient complaints that she would be terminated.

So, here's my dilemma. This nurse called me today and asked me if she could use me as a reference when she applied for other jobs. I told her that I couldn't give her a good reference with a clear conscience. I feel sort of guilty about that. When she does a good job, she does a very good job, but when she doesn't she is nothing short of horrible. I still hate the idea that she is out of work and is probably going to have a tough time finding another job. I know have no reason to feel guilty, but...sigh! Should I call her and tell her I changed my mind and focus on her positive attributes if someone calls or should I stick to my guns? Thanks for reading my vent!