but i dont want to be a bytch

  1. so i pass the audition and am finally accepted on our unit. battle won but not the war.
    now i find myself having to deal with some of the assistants.
    i dont want to continually tell them what needs done...they know..i dont want to bytch at them all the time. i dont want the hassle. and i sure as heck dont want to be a tattle tale. not my style.
    looks like im going to have to do one or the other soon tho...arghhhh

    for the past two days i have had the misfortune to work with one of the worst. kicker is she is going to nursing school. boy i cant wait for her to graduate..lol
    she did vital signs and accuchecks and that was about it. never bathed anyone, changed one bed cos i told her to. never sent any specimens. left urine and feces in the bathroom....needed a specimen but she never sent them. pt complained to the mgr. i had to force her to go in and take care of it.
    i had to force her to do everything. asked her to run to medical records...was urgent. she told me no...she was charting...lol
    i went. god knows i had nothing to do...lol
    she looks good on paper tho. she charts every single thing she does so she looks busy.
    yesterday happened to be the day the mgr decided to go around and ask the patients how they felt about their care. all the things she did were taken note of by the mgr. of course i am going to hear about them too but its worth it. i wouldnt do her job yesterday. i did it the day before.
    yesterday was nuts. i had no time.
    the mgr came up to her and told her bout the things she didnt do. she never said a word to me...the assistant says to me "boy are we in trouble" lol
    no...i dont think we are.

    then we have a clique of assistants who try to run the unit by trying to intimidate the nursing staff and some of them, they do.
    in the next day or so im going to be on the shytlist because i did go to the mgr and complained, naming names. and i know they are all going to turn on me and i know that things are going to get very uncomfortable for a while but damn i dont know what else i can do. i tell them whats up and they dont listen. they do this to all the nurses, not just me, but seems like im the only one gutsy (stupid) enough to speak up...



    i dont want to be a bytch!
    Last edit by thisnurse on Jan 25, '02
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  2. 26 Comments

  3. by   night owl
    I gotta admit that at times it does get very frustrating working with people like that because I've been there. The only thing I find that works for me, is to confront the person your having a conflict with. Bring them in, sit them down, close the door and ask them, "What IS the problem?" You'll be amazed at what a good heart to heart does for two individuals. On the other hand document that you had this encounter in case things back fire at least you have proof that you confronted her with your concerns. Then see how things go. I'm always willing to give the benefit of the doubt. If you don't see any improvement, then you've got to write her up. I HATE "telling on people" too, but sometimes you just have to in order to hopefully improve the situation. Sometimes when pts complain about an employee to me, I encourage the pt to speak to the nurse manager. It seems that the NM will jump higher and run faster when they complain rather than yourself...customer service is #1 right? so when they complain, management jumps. At least your mgr went around and asked the pts how they felt about their care. That's a good start. Hopefully the pts told her the truth b/c sometimes they get intimidated too for fear of retaliation. I'll close for now, but let us know how things turn out so far...But, confrontation with the other person is a must in order to find solutions to the problems.
  4. by   kaycee
    thisnurse,

    sometimes you have to be a bytch to get a little respect. After a while the title will change to, she's a good nurse who expects everyone to pull their load and do what is best for the patients.
    Be a bytch for a while, I was and now when I come back from vacation or days off I hear, oh we wish you were here it was so nut's without you. I was a bytch to some people for probably 15 or more years out of my 27year career so far.
    I'm more mellow now for I have precepted more bytches to take over where I left off.
    Don't worry thisnurse being a bytch(in the way you describe, and the way I mean) is in many ways growing into a really good nurse!!!!!
  5. by   thisnurse
    what IS the problem turned into WHAT PROBLEM?
    i know what i have to do its just that i HATE doing it.
    you know some of these people work harder trying to avoid work than if they actually did what they are supposed to.
    they are like little kids...I DONT HAVE TO LISTEN TO YOU..
    well yeah, sorry but you do. you wanna call the shots go to school and be a nurse. god bless.
    i cant wait until this one graduates and she gets the same kind of respect she gives. its going to be even harder on her because she is one of THEM. they are going to expect her to accept the same crap she dishes out. going to be interesting to see how she handles it when HER butt is on the line.
    thanks for the advice. ill do what i have to but i dont like it.
  6. by   RyanRN
    I do my job and expect you to do yours, it's simple! And to be perfectly honest I will jump right in and assist them if I see the need and I am available. Sometimes if a NA sees that you aren't pulling rank all the time (I know you said you were not) they turn around.
    If they don't, it's my opinion that since I am supposed to be their superior and am NOT (I have NO power to discipline or fire someone like this) I do not hesitate to have the nurse manager do HER job and speak to this person. I will sit in on any conference and really listen to what they have to say without comment. I too HATE the process but something you just have to.

    Maybe prioritizing in the morning and assigning which baths she will do would help. When I ask for something STAT I mean it. Whatever she is doing can wait and don;t hesitate to say so. Could you wait out a Code because you were 'charting'.

    And just so you don't think I live in never-never land I know darned well there are people out there whose entire life is spent trying to over on everyone. I overheard a group of NA's talking at lunch once "I don't care it's the nurse's responsibility anyway, not mine". There are just some attitude problems that need to look elsewhere for employment. I'd put money on this girl that she expects perfection from any NA she has to work with once she graduates and is bythy about it too, some people just never change. Bottom line, this situation stinks, my sympathies are with you.
  7. by   remail99
    It is very frustrating when co-workers don't take pride in their work. I have had the same problem, and have learned that unless you are the supervisor you can't do anything about it. You can notify a supervisor. Our hospital has a process of writing up the incident, and then it is reviewed by all parties and their supervisors....and it goes on offending parties permanent record. No need to look like bee with an itch, put it on someone else if you have too. Keep working at it though because pateint care IS the top priority.


    Good luck! Melissa
  8. by   Rustyhammer
    I've been there. the new kid on the block. The one with authority but hell if he's going to get to use it.
    I finally walked someone to the time clock and then to the door with the message that I wont have them back til we all meet with the boss.
    They would rather lose an aide than a nurse and it sends a message out to the rest.

    -Russell
  9. by   thisnurse
    i think i have pulled rank maybe once. all night i am filling water pitchers, putting ppl on and taking them off bedpans, walking them to the bathroom, sending labs..ALL NIGHT. and i wasnt too
    busy at the time so i didnt care. the assistants decided to split up their assignment the way THEY wanted to and not the way they were scheduled (one per nurse) nobody told me anything. because i was being "nice" i got behind on my meds. i was rushing like crazy to get them out. one of the call lights was going off for what seemed like forever. of course, i answered it. and of course it was a patient that had a bm and wanted off the bedpan. she was the type of pt who wouldnt even try to wipe herself so i knew i was looking at like 20 mns. she wasnt even my patient. i went to get her assistant. she put this woman on the bedpan and LEFT. she was on the other side of the unit doing accuchecks on pts that werent hers. i saw my assistant and asked her where her friend was. i proceeded to tell her about the patient that needed off the pot. she said WELL WHY DONT YOU GO DO IT?
    i couldnt believe she said that to me. and this bytch wasnt doing anything!
    i told her ABSOLUTELY NOT. i had meds to give and i was already behind.
    then she said...ive been doing YOUR job all night.
    i couldnt believe that. what job of MINE could SHE possibly have been doing?
    that was enough of that crap.
    "one of you are going to get that patient off the bedpan RIGHT NOW. i dont care who does it but its going to be done NOW" i never raised my voice. i told her flat out the way it was going to be.
    man was she mad. she yelled OK ILL JUST DO IT MYSELF!
    i smiled and said "thank you"
    and finished giving my meds.
    she hasnt spoken to me since. who cares.

    i decided right then that if any of them do that to me again, argue with me, flatly refuse to do their job, or i have to go find them i am going to call the supervisor and ask them to either send them home or assign them to someone else because they are useless.

    and the next time one of them disappears for hours at a time i am going to have them paged overhead so that everyone in the whole damn hospital can hear it...lol
  10. by   kaycee
    YOU GO GIRL!!!!!!!!!!!
  11. by   night owl
    ...Sometimes you just have to be a bytch...
  12. by   thisnurse
    lol..thanks guys

    ill keep you informed of my progress...lol
  13. by   tiredfeet2
    Why is it when you are doing your job, you are labeled a *****. I don't think just because you have to tell someone what to do makes you the "*****". I know it gets frustrating but keep your chin up, you're doing a great job
    Cammie
  14. by   Tiggeress
    I have only been a nurse for a year now. ( a little late getting started) But when I was in nursing school, and working on Med, Surg, we had some nurse who use to get angry at us for not helping them with pts that we were not assigned. We had NA's that would not help us. So when we went to class the next time, I asked our teacher "what should we do?" She said 1. you are not to help with other pts. 2. No matter that you are a student, the NA's are there to do certain work. 3. You had better learn now how to get other people to work with you. 4. Always remember be professional, be courteous, be aware you might be working with these people one day. 5. Alway do what is best for the pt, even if that means writting someone up, or reporting them.
    So when I went back the next day, I politly told the RN "Sorry I am not allowed to touch a pt unless my teacher has assigned them to me, but I will find someone who can help." and to the NA's that didn't want to help, I would go up to them not as a student but as a student "Nurse" and say, "Excuse me, are you busy? I am glad you are not. Can you follow me I need assistance now?" and 9 out of 10 times they did help after that.
    After I got my LPN, I went back to that hospital and used some of the people I worked with on Med, Surg as referrences, and got a job there on the Psych Unit. Its not always being a "BEEP" sometimes its just showing authority, and doing what is right for the pt. So keep doing whats right for the pts.
    Last edit by Tiggeress on Jan 27, '02

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but i dont want to be a bytch