after 35 years, I cannot believe it

Nurses General Nursing

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After a 35 year career, today may end it. After 20 years of hospital work, I was recruited by a surgical practice to be their lead nurse. I have now worked with this group for 15 years. I became a grandma in November (an answer to prayer!) and have been looking forward to a little time with this baby. I had asked the group for a two month leave of absence in September. Without getting into specifics, this leave is VERY important to me. This morning, I was told that they were not granting this leave. One doctor actually said to me "I am sorry about this but I can't imagine running this practice without you for 9 weeks" I am crushed. I have worked like an ox for this group and have never asked for anything. I am 58 years old. I feel like they are taking a calculated risk but thinking that I am too old to quit. My husband says we don't need the money and I should give notice tomorrow. I wonder if I even want to give notice. I do not want to work here any longer.

Please, what would you do?

If circumstances change and you need income, you can draw social security early at 62. I would lean toward leaving. It is time for you to have something for yourself after all these years. Believe me, if it suited them, you would be out the door without a thought.

Everyone is replaceable. They are holding this over your head because they feel they can.

Can they?

Make sure of your finances before doing anything.

Congrats, Grandma.

Specializes in ICU.

They said no to a LOA or paid vacation nine months from now? Do whatever you feel like doing.

Myself I would take several nice long vacations to use up my PTO and then resign in August.

Specializes in ICU.

They said no to a LOA or paid vacation nine months from now? Do whatever you feel like doing.

Myself I would take several nice long vacations to use up

my PTO and then resign or retire in August.

When they get that letter it might wake them up.

Honestly, and not saying goes that you're old, but at your age and being that you have family commitments and want a break I would leave. You have enough experience to get something else. Perhaps school nurse would be great for you. Summers, weekends and holidays off, snow days off, no late evenings or on call. You'll get plenty of time to be with the grandkids even when they are in school.

Specializes in Critical care.

Well, it's all your fault for being so darn irreplaceable;)

You should give a generous notice if you're going to leave. Don't let an emotional reaction tarnish your respectable career.

If I didn't need to work and this leave was important I would resubmit notice of my leave versus request for my leave.

Specializes in Med Surg.
I am crushed. I have worked like an ox for this group and have never asked for anything. I am 58 years old.

I am sorry this happened to you. I would encourage new nurses to view your example as a lesson. Our employers are just that - our employers. After they pay us for showing up that day, the vast majority of them really don't care about us.

No matter how well we do, or how much we care, or how "above and beyond" we distinguish ourselves, our tenure can end immediately any time. That manager, CEO, or owner (who loves us dearly) can quit, get fired, retire or sell and the next to take their place doesn't give a rat's hind end about your years of service.

So by all means, give that extra effort, go above and beyond, and be a great employee.

But know for certain you are doing this for *yourself*, because that is how you want to work. Don't do it for some reward, loyalty, or payback from your employer because too often there just isn't any. Not in today's disposable American workforce.

I love my job and all, but I have no delusions about any loyalty from management in any way.

Specializes in Clinical Research, Outpt Women's Health.

If you can afford to leave,do it, but do it professionally and give proper notice and be nice and do not burn any bridges.

Why? Because life can change without notice and you may need to get a job in the future and if you leave in flames that will be a big issue.

After a 35 year career, today may end it. After 20 years of hospital work, I was recruited by a surgical practice to be their lead nurse. I have now worked with this group for 15 years. I became a grandma in November (an answer to prayer!) and have been looking forward to a little time with this baby. I had asked the group for a two month leave of absence in September. Without getting into specifics, this leave is VERY important to me. This morning, I was told that they were not granting this leave. One doctor actually said to me "I am sorry about this but I can't imagine running this practice without you for 9 weeks" I am crushed. I have worked like an ox for this group and have never asked for anything. I am 58 years old. I feel like they are taking a calculated risk but thinking that I am too old to quit. My husband says we don't need the money and I should give notice tomorrow. I wonder if I even want to give notice. I do not want to work here any longer.

Please, what would you do?

Why not just FMLA them for something? It's the law. You don't ruffle feathers, they can't do much to you, and you can always come back if you want, but in the meantime you could burn your PTO and sick time and if you decide to come back great, if not oh well. If they can you while on FMLA that's not going to go well for them.

If they can't respect you for 2 months off after all your years of service then I would use the law to get what you want and make them pound sand.

That's frustrating. Maybe see if they will allow you to take a month instead of two? I wouldn't just walk out, but perhaps letting them know that this is a dealbreaker for you will change their opinion?

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