Acute Care Nurses: How Do You Balance Home Life(Kids/Marriage) and Work?

Nurses General Nursing

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I am curious as to how you all(Nurses and NPs) juggle life with partners and children while working a typical 12 hr shift. I plan on becoming a Neonatal NP but I also want a husband and children, I'm 21 yrs old by the way and want to get married and have my first child in my late 20s. If everything goes to plan, I should finish with my DNP by the time I'm 28. But I'm worried because I keep reading that marriages end due to stress from working in medicine and not having enough time.

This is also the reason why my cousin decided to become a Primary Care Peds NP. She felt like she would have missed her kids childhood if she had gone for AC. But of course there is no primary care for the NNP role and requires you to work in the hospital with 12/24 hr shifts.

How do you guys with kids and/or partners juggle this?

For reference: I have never dated nor had a boyfriend because I feel as though I can't attend nursing school and concentrate on building/maintaining a relationship. This is also the same reason why I have decided to wait until marriage for sex. I'm not ready for the consequences which includes potentially getting pregnant.

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*bump

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Specializes in ICU.

I think you are planning and worrying to much. Life never goes the way you planned it. Never. And that, is what makes life so great. Your plan falls apart and you have to respond to that, which teaches you lessons and makes you stronger.

My advice. Chill, and take life as it comes. If you fall in love next week and decide to get married and end up pregnant at 24, so what? You deal with it and you still find a way to fulfill your dreams. The best things in life like love and kids, are never planned. They just happen.

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I think you should take everything one step at a time. It's good to have plans, but the reality of life is that it rarely goes according to plan. I never wanted to get married and I especially didn't want to have kids. I'm married with two kids and I homeschool them. I wouldn't change a thing.

I think you should try to relax a bit and try to enjoy your 20's. Become a nurse, see how you like it. You may not even enjoy neonatal care, and you may find that your goals change.

Good luck.

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Specializes in Home Health, Mental/Behavioral Health.

Life is what you make of it. I suggest you start living it. There are some things that are better left unplanned. Love for one. It's a force of nature. But It'll happen only if you let it. Don't let it slip you by because your too worried about it messing up your career. Same goes for a child.

I bet the girls of my graduating class looked at me with pity as I waddled across the stage at 8 and 1/2 months pregnant with my first child to recieve my HS diploma. I bet alot of them thought my life was over. Not even close my friends!

I then went on to graduate from an LPN program and passed my NCLEX first attempt, now with 2 children and married by this time.

My life isn't perfect but I can definitely say that I am very happy, love my husband and kids, and still working to further my education/nursing career. It's fun and challenging and keeps my mind sharp constantly striving to better myself.

Having a partner or kids will not prevent your career goals from becoming a reality.

Life is too short to plan on not loving.

My personal opinion anyway.

Take care of yourself and don't worry so much!

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For reference: I have never dated nor had a boyfriend because I feel as though I can't attend nursing school and concentrate on building/maintaining a relationship. This is also the same reason why I have decided to wait until marriage for sex. I'm not ready for the consequences which includes potentially getting pregnant.

It is quite possible to maintain a relationship and go to nursing school. I would bet that the majority of people do so while in school. I was married and a mother already when I started. I gave birth to my second child while in school and still finished. It can be done. I wouldn't necessarily recommend that you get pregnant while in school, but it is certainly possible to nourish a relationship with another person while you are in school. It's a vigorous program, but it still leaves plenty of time to be a normal human being.

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I have a different opinion. I commend you for knowing what you want and for waiting for marriage and to have sex and realizing that there are unintended consequences to not doing so. Yes, single women get pregnant all the time and raise children, but regardless of how frequently it happens or the opinion of others on the subject, the fact of the matter is that children do better with a two parent family and it isn't fair to them to knowingly take that away from them when it can be prevented. Once you have children, it's no longer about you, but what is best for them and your husband. Once you do get married and have children, you will find a way to make things work, and as long as you put your family first you will know the right thing to do.

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Specializes in ED.

You can definitely date and have fun during nursing school! I was married with 2 kids and got a 4.0. Hard yes, but it was fine. Don't plan too much. Things will happen they way they should.

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