About those really "hateful, crotchety" patients... - page 2

Ever have any of these? The kind who truly think their face will crumble if they crack a smile? Well, we have one. Just ONE, mind you... the only one we've ever had, and she's relatively new..... Read More

  1. by   jnette
    Quote from RNKittyKat
    jnette, you are truly a woman of the South. Your grace and charm can melt an iceberg.
    Woman of the SOUTH ?????????


    oops, sorry... heh heh heh.... transplanted Yankee here.

    One of them "DA** Yankees, no less. The kind that STAY. :chuckle
    But thank you, nonetheless. :kiss

    Deb, Leslie.. yes, I do love the cranky ones.. "difficult" ones, ..and as you so well described it.. "it just kills them to laugh; they automatically cup their mouths after they laugh, like "oops what did i just do?" ... this is EXACTLY what she does... then probably kicks herself for allowing herself a moment's joy.

    I don't "spoil" her or uneccessarily "pet" her.. I'm also quite stern with her when need be (like when she waits for you to LIFT her out of her wheelchair when she is perfectly capable of getting up and out herself) ... and yet... I dunno... there's just something about this little "connection" we seem to have. Almost as if she prepared herself in advance to not be "broken" this time, and me doing my darndest to break in... love it. Silly powerplay or something.

    But it's really fun to see her smile. And she's almost ashamed to HAVE smiled. I love it... can't wait to see her every time, and think up something sneaky to get her with ! :chuckle
  2. by   susanna
    thats so sweet. i dont know how you do that. i dont think i could be cheery and always thinking of new jokes all the time around someone who was always cranky. after a while, it tires me. you're brave and diligent : )
  3. by   jnette
    Quote from susanna
    thats so sweet. i dont know how you do that. i dont think i could be cheery and always thinking of new jokes all the time around someone who was always cranky. after a while, it tires me. you're brave and diligent : )
    I see it as a CHALLENGE... something to conquer.

    Maybe I'm just driven... maybe I'm "jest plumb crazy".
  4. by   Angela Mac
    food for thought- misery loves company
    but company does not have to love misery
  5. by   EarthChild1130
    What a great story Thanks for sharing it with us!
  6. by   susanna
    Quote from jnette
    I see it as a CHALLENGE... something to conquer.
    Yeah, I think thats the best piece of advice someone can give in order to motivate someone to do something they dont feel like doing. Thanks for reminding me of it.
  7. by   z's playa
    Stories like this one solidify the reason why I chose to pursue nursing!

    Bless you Jnette.
  8. by   Nurse Ratched
    Quote from earle58
    the cranky types are my favorites. it just kills them to laugh; they automatically cup their mouths after they laugh, like "oops what did i just do?" again and as usual jnette, you work your magic. xoxo

    leslie
    Ditto . The cranky LOL's are my absolute favs, too. Tickles me to no end to get an elderly pt who is reported to be demented, combative, intractable, etc., and a little kindness turns them into darlings .
  9. by   warrior woman
    Jnette, I am absolutely convinced that she was waiting for you to come into her life, even if she wasn't consciously aware of it. Her heart was longing for this encounter like a key opening a long rusted shut lock. You unlocked the door to her heart. Just like you have with all of us. Bless you my friend.
  10. by   Energizer Bunny
    Quote from jnette
    ever have any of these?

    the kind who truly think their face will crumble if they crack a smile?
    netters.....this story brought a smile to my heart. you truly are a most unique individual with the gift of giving to others just what they need. i am so proud to know you. i just hope that one day i can be as good of a nurse as you are.
  11. by   mother/babyRN
    Great job....I love those patients...Usually they are big teddy bears underneath. I count so many of my lessons in nursing from those patients. For instance, as a new grad I worked with an elderly gentleman who the term crotchedly was made for...As we were going on the elevator for his discharge, I was happily chattering his discharge teaching to him when he took my hand, smiled a rare smile and softly said, little one, you are a wonderful person and a special nurse, but sometimes you can't fix things and sometimes patients are just not going to do the things they should...It struck me that all the teaching I had done had been for me because he was a known uncompliant diabetic and my idealism was not going to change that. From him I learned that you can't save everyone and as he eloquently told me in his own way, you have to let some people be and just hope for the best....After that, he took my chin in his arthritic hands, gave me an eskimo kiss, thanked me, got into the car and went out of my life..I remember him because of that and the lessons he taught...We can only do what we can do...Life does the rest....
  12. by   mother/babyRN
    Your patients will not ever forget you....Go with you heart.. You sound like an amazing nurse and wonderful person...Patients are fortunate to have you in their corner and in their hearts...{{{}}}
  13. by   ktwlpn
    Quote from jnette
    Ever have any of these?

    The kind who truly think their face will crumble if they crack a smile?

    Well, we have one. Just ONE, mind you... the only one we've ever had, and she's relatively new.. about eight months or so. In her early seventies.

    I'll tell you, this woman LIVES to be miserable.. it's her life's mission. It looks like her frown is literally CARVED into her face.

    Sooooooooooo... I have made it MY mission and daily challenge to bring a smile to this little lady's face, no matter HOW much it hurts her !!!

    Yep, I do my darndest to make her smile.. (and shhhhhhh... don't let this get out... but possibly even to make her LAUGH !) :uhoh21: ... once a day.
    Yes.. in spite of herself, and out of pure spiteful enjoyment on my part. :chuckle

    Heh... so today she comes in, all grumbly and frowning as usual.. it's raining, and she despises the rain.. (but then she seems to despise just about ANYthing)... so I promptly ask her (in my most stern voice and serious expression) just who gave her permission to order all this rain? And that we sure would like to see a speck of sun at least ONCE in a great while!!!

    Well, she was taken aback by that, and really looked at me kinda funny.. then before she knew it, she laughed !!! Just as quickly, she realized she was laughing, and stopped.

    Later , as she was waiting on the wheelchair van to pick her up, it really started coming down... and I mean in SHEETS ! I saw her angrily glance out the window at the pouring rain, and said... " * her name* , now aren't you glad you didn't come in here on your motorcycle today?"

    Well, she must have thought I had totally lost it... she was stunned, and once again, before she knew it, that sheepish grin crept across her face, threatening to steal her gloom... and then it happed.. AGAIN !!! For the second time in one day, this woman LAUGHED !!! Just as soon as she did, however, she caught herself, frowned, looked down and put on her grumpiest face and said in her TRULY thick, country accent " I ain't NEVER rode no motorcycle.. "


    heh heh heh

    Wow.. what a rewarding day it was, indeed ! My efforts paid off. That was a first.. two laughs in one day !

    So, to reward HER for her generosity, I made a point to accompany her out to the WC Van, holding an umbrella over her head. Secretly, she was tickled by this.. you could just "sense" it. Then as she was being hydraulically lifted up into the van, she looked at me, and said "what about you? Now you're getting all wet." (this little woman has never showed an ounce of concern for ANYone's wellbeing other than her OWN, mind you.)

    I patted her hand with a big smile and replied.. "not too worry... I won't melt.. I'm not sweet enough."

    And that time, she smiled.. a genuine, warm smile... the first I've ever seen from her.. it was even in her eyes.

    Life is good.
    Great job! I'm with you-it's my life's mission to get those people to lighten up...I took care of an old Parkinson's gal-very independent and stubborn.One day I took her to the bathroom and she b*tched and moaned through the entire trip-the toilet seat was too high,too hard,too big-the paper was too hard-I used too much,etc...She asked me for a drink of "ice cold water" afterwards...As she took a sip I asked 'Sugar-Is it wet enough for you?" It was SO HARD for her to try not to laugh....but she gave in and let it out....That become a running gag with us until she died .She would say " I want a drink of water and make sure it's cold and wet" What a stinker....I am working on another one now-I helped pass lunch trays one day-I asked her if I could butter her bread for her...Then I said " OK -which side do you want it on? Right or left? Top or Bottom? That did it...We both cracked up.I will practically stand on my head to get a rise out of some of these folks..I love to laugh with them....It's healthy-brings the b/p down....

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