3 dui's in mi

I, myself, have one DWI and will not ever get behind the wheel after a drink... My first husband died at age 30 and I was 29... Not an excuse, but I was in a bad bad place and should have never driven after drinking... Jail was not fun... I make it be known to every employer that I have this on my record and it is plain embarassing at this point... I am now 34, remarried and refuse to drive after a drink... I learned my lesson and it seems like your friend has not... Wake up call is needed for her...

Tough lessons learned.

Don't know why this thread was started. If its looking for sympathy, you've come to the wrong place. If its for advice, good choice! And I congratulate you if your looking for how to deal with this.

Your friend needs to first be honest with herself and you need to not enable her but also consider if she is abusing alcohol. She has fortunately survived her driving drunk and so have others who unknowingly shared the road with her but for how long? At least 5 years by Michigan laws and good thing at that.

I have a question, if your g-friend had a chest xray that showed something abnormal, do you think she would ignore it? Maybe, but, i suspect she would have less denial about that than she does with her drinking. Denial is a common unconscious defensive coping mechanism employed by most drug/alcohol abusers and addicts. It can be tough to deal with.

Question, has your friend been increasing the amount of alcohol she drinks to get the same affect? Does she find regular reasons for getting high? (positive or negative, like loosing her license, good reason from the perspective of an alcoholic to go get drunk). Does she feel sick if she doesn't drink (morning shakes, anxiety, and if she drinks does she feel better, Does she need alcohol to be sociable?) These are few things to look at.

Do a little online research about alcoholism, the signs and symptoms and what to do if one suspects a drug or alcohol problem. The greatest help you can offer is honesty and guidance to get treatment if she needs for excessive drinking.

Last question, did losing her drivers license lead her to stop drinking and has it gotten worse since?

I don't think that people should get an immediate driving ban or loss of licensure after 1 dui and I'll tell you why.

Back when I lived in England we had a party round someones house who lived out in the middle of nowhere. One of the people at the party there had four glasses of red wine, went to bed at midnight staying over at the party and thought he'd be safe driving home at 9:30am. Wrong - he got a DUI as he was still just above the limit. He was really trying to be responsible but I guess the body doesn't metabolize alcohol as quickly as we think it does. However, make the mistake again and I don't think you've learnt anything.

Just a little clarification...

2+2=5 - mistake

Adding a cup of salt instead of sugar to your cookie recipe - mistake

Mixing up the words their, there, and they're - mistake

Making the decision at some level to consume alcohol and get behind the wheel - NOT a mistake. Impaired or not, there is some form of decision making going on where the individual justifies getting BTW intoxicated. Putting other people at risk like that is just plain unforgivable.

4 glasses of wine WON'T put you that far over the limit unless you are a really small person. Even if that is wrong, the only way you are getting pulled over 9:30 hours later is if you were driving erratically. IF they were still erratic 9:30 hours later they most likely didn't JUST drink 4 glasses of wine.

Either way, your friend knew he was impaired and made the choice to drive anyways. Poor choices reflect lack of responsibility or maturity. Either way, tough punishment is still called for.

What's happened to peace8 ?

I applied for a license from a midwestern state by endorsement. As part of the disclosure I put down a 26 year old DUI stop (plead to reckless driving). No repeat offenses, in fact a grand total of ONE traffic ticket since and it was non-alcohol related. You would have thought I was a constant drunk driver. The BON wanted certified copies of the court disposition, which no longer existed in the small town court where it happened. (Made the exact same disclosure to my original state of licensure with no problem.)

I finally had to hire a lawyer to get the bureaucrats off their a##es.

And this person has three DUIs and counting? Somewhere is a happy medium.

I'm a recovering alcoholic, and on that level I have a lot of sympathy for the nurse. It isn't easy to get and stay sober.

However sympathy does not translate in any way to tolerance for her continued drunk driving.

Addiction and how you deal with addiction are not the same. Propensity and opportunity will get you a long way down the road to substance abuse and addiction.

But taking that drink, starting the car, those are choices, and people are responsible for their choices.

i am shocked she still has her nursing license. i don't feel sorry for at all. she coud have killed someone.