"Men should be EMT's or Doctors!" - page 6

So our floor had this little old lady who was basically your general pain in the keester. Declined meds, treatments, tests...and was needy as all get go but no one could satisfy her. Very bold... Read More

  1. by   teeituptom
    Quote from caroladybelle
    There is a difference, Tom.

    And being 90 years old, is not an adequate excuse for being a sexist witch, just as it isn't for being racist. If anything else, she should have learned better by now.

    Considering the eras that she grew up in and lived through. I find that to be quite an adequate excuse.

    just because she is 90, doesnt mean she has to be Mother Theresa
  2. by   teeituptom
    Quote from Valanda
    In the interest of promoting more care in people's choice of words, I'd like to point out that there are a growing number of Wiccan's and other pagans who take offense at the use of the term "witch" in such a derogatory way. I just found it odd that so many of these posts speak of racism, bigotry and predjudice, yet this slur passed unnoticed.
    This just goes to prove that nowadays. There is absolutely nothing that anyone can say, that somewhere, somehow, someway who will and can find something wrong with whatever you say.

    THANK GOD thinking is still safe


    Hooray the Democrats kicked Republican _____!!!!!!!!
  3. by   teeituptom
    Quote from Runner10k9
    Got to take issue with Teeituptom.

    Turning 90 or 100 or whatever does not give one carte blanche to treat people like dirt. No one ever earns the right to "feel whatever way they want to feel." What if she starting making racist or other blatantly bigoted remarks? You going to stand around and just let her feel whatever way she wants?

    No, TriageNurse_34 had the right perspective. Respond to bigotry when you see it -- use your judgement on how best to respond -- Try to gently explain it to the person to change his or her mind -- it may not work, but at least there's a chance you'll be successful. Whereas the approach Teeituptom endorses, simply guarantees the status quo and thus assures that attitudes will not change.

    TriageNurse -- Three cheers.
    Teeituptom -- Please reconsider.
    One, not a chance on reconsidering

    two. we have the absolute right to "feel whatever way we want to feel"
    Feelings are our own.
    Now legally we no longer have the right of free speech. That has been callously stripped away from us by the Republicans.
    Personally I prefer the status quo as opposed to having our previous rights stripped away from us slowly but inexhorably.



    HOORAY THE DEMOCRATS TOTALLY KICKED SOME REPUBLICAN_______!!
  4. by   teeituptom
    Quote from caroladybelle
    There is a difference, Tom.

    It is quite another to reject him, by saying that he needs to grow some testes and be an MD/EMT (as though he is not a "real" man, or that "real" men cannot be nurses) ...that is a form of highly inflammatory sexist bias. And then to tell him never to enter the door, because of this.

    And being 90 years old, is not an adequate excuse for being a sexist witch, just as it isn't for being racist. If anything else, she should have learned better by now.
    Personally I would have found it very amusing if she had said that to me. And I would have thought she was very sweet. I never would have been wimpy enough to take offense at it. Trust me there are a lot more things in this world to find offense with


    Hooray, Demos rule the House and the Senate
  5. by   CrazyPremed
    Even though the woman may have grown up in a different era, she's living in today's world. She also grew up in time when segregation was legal. Should keep all minority workers away from her too? I'm completely understanding of many things - as a male nursing student and health care worker for 6+ years - but I have definite limits. My job is to provide health care, not serve as a sounding board for sexual, racial, religious, or any other type of discrimination. Just because a person isn't used to seeing a nurse/phleb/tech/whatever that looks like me, doesn't mean that I want to hear how wrong they think it is. Period. She also grew up in time when segregation was legal. Should we keep all minority workers away from her, too?

    Nobody ever cured disease by listening to discriminatory ramblings.

    What's funny to me is that many female pt's may have problems with a male nurse bathing them or taking an EKG, but have no problem with a male doctor performing a pelvic or delivering their baby. Oh, well. I guess I'll finally get my respect when I have MD behind my name .

    CrazyPremed
  6. by   K.L.A.
    It is nice to know that someone has our backs when faced with such an attitude. She needs to wake up and realize that she is not still living in the 19th century. She also needs to understand that not everybody wants to be an EMT and most people can't afford to attend med school.We do, however want to get our foot into the health field and nursing gives us that opportunity, beside that nursing is a really good field to be in. Thanks again.
  7. by   RN34TX
    Quote from teeituptom
    Considering the eras that she grew up in and lived through. I find that to be quite an adequate excuse.

    just because she is 90, doesnt mean she has to be Mother Theresa
    And just because we are nurses, doesn't mean that we have to be Mother Theresa either and have to take a patient's abuse.

    Like I stated in a previous post, I have always made allowances for older patient's upbringing and generation when hearing offensive comments.

    I realize that you can't always help the fact that you are a product of your upbringing and generation.
    But there's a limit and that excuse can only go so far.

    I grew up in an all white conservative town during a time when it was still acceptable to use derogatory terms for both Blacks, Asians, and gays...and still is acceptable today in that area.

    Does that make it ok for me to still live my life as if I were still living in that town during that era when dealing with my co-workers, strangers on the street, and/or patients?
  8. by   sheilagh
    [quote=teeituptom]I look at things a little differently

    At 90 years old, she should be allowed to feel what ever way she wants to feel. By God she has earned that right.She has served her time, paid her dues,and who knows what factors she faced while achieving her 90 years.
    This world is big enough for all types, even me

    I actually disagree because you open yourself up to people taking things too far, ex: recently at my sister hospital a woman absolutely refused to let the nurse assigned to her help her and demanded the supervisor change to another nurse.What was wrong with the nurse? well he was a male, but that wasn't the problem, it was because he was black ! And to make an outrageous situation even worse, the supervisor acquiesed and another white nurse was assigned. This was a 32 yoa accountant about to give birth and all she was worried about was skin color.
    The male nurse in question filed a complaint with administration, and a new (thought one already existed) policy of discrimination came down from above, with apologies to the black male nurse.
  9. by   nursemike
    Much as I hate to say it, I don't think we can hang this on the Republicans. In fact, one is still pretty much free to tell someone to "grow some testes" or call someone wimpy, with very little in the way of legal impediment. On the other hand, the right to cry foul over such remarks is also protected.

    One conservative principle I do hold is that one ought to be accountable for one's actions, in word or deed. In my culture (white trash hillbilly redneck) if you tell a man to grow some testes and he punches you in the nose, you don't have a whole lot to cry about. There may be more civilized responses, but this seems fair enough, to me. I watch my mouth, and I don't get punched.
    On the other hand, there are people, such as 90 yr old ladies, who enjoy immunity from punches in the nose. To use that immunity as a license to say things that merit a punch in the nose, knowing one won't suffer the consequences, is craven.
    On a purely secular level, I suppose one does have every right to harbor such thoughts and beliefs. Whether one is accountable to a higher authority is debatable--I tend to believe one is, but also to hope that Court is a lenient one, since I have any number of foibles of my own to repent.

    Again, I think the key to this whole incident is that Triage cared enough to support her co-worker. The patient was not made to "pay" for her behavior, but surely ought not to have expected to be praised for it, either.
  10. by   teeituptom
    Quote from nursemike
    Much as I hate to say it, I don't think we can hang this on the Republicans. In fact, one is still pretty much free to tell someone to "grow some testes" or call someone wimpy, with very little in the way of legal impediment. On the other hand, the right to cry foul over such remarks is also protected.


    <<<<<<<<<< Yes I hang it on the Republicans>


    One conservative principle I do hold is that one ought to be accountable for one's actions, in word or deed. In my culture (white trash hillbilly redneck) if you tell a man to grow some testes and he punches you in the nose, you don't have a whole lot to cry about. There may be more civilized responses, but this seems fair enough, to me. I watch my mouth, and I don't get punched.

    <<<<<<<<<<<< Personally , I like a good fight. I still get into 2 or 3 ounch outs a year. I actually enjoy it. However my wife still kicks my Rearend>

    On the other hand, there are people, such as 90 yr old ladies, who enjoy immunity from punches in the nose. To use that immunity as a license to say things that merit a punch in the nose, knowing one won't suffer the consequences, is craven.

    <<<<<<<<<<<<Where does it even indicate she is her age as an immunity. At her age she has earned the right to feel and say whatever she has to say. We dont have to listen to it, but she has that right...This sad world will be even sadder when we take away the rights of the elderly who have fought and helped preserve those rights for all.>


    On a purely secular level, I suppose one does have every right to harbor such thoughts and beliefs. Whether one is accountable to a higher authority is debatable--I tend to believe one is, but also to hope that Court is a lenient one, since I have any number of foibles of my own to repent.

    Again, I think the key to this whole incident is that Triage cared enough to support her co-worker. The patient was not made to "pay" for her behavior, but surely ought not to have expected to be praised for it, either.
    How should she be made to pay for her behaviour.
    Life imprisonment
    Take away her desert at dinner
    refuse to care for her




    Hooray for the Democrats, they now have the RULE
  11. by   buddiage
    Quote from teeituptom
    This just goes to prove that nowadays. There is absolutely nothing that anyone can say, that somewhere, somehow, someway who will and can find something wrong with whatever you say.

    THANK GOD thinking is still safe


    Hooray the Democrats kicked Republican _____!!!!!!!!
    This whole "battle of the parties" has no winners. We all lose because they play games and prove loyalty to their "parties," not to us citizens who they are supposed to serve. Our founding fathers would be shaking thier heads at this political mess.

    People like us end up funding this stupidity out of our pockets. :-(
  12. by   nursemike
    Quote from teeituptom
    How should she be made to pay for her behaviour.
    Life imprisonment
    Take away her desert at dinner
    refuse to care for her




    Hooray for the Democrats, they now have the RULE
    I didn't mean to suggest that she should be made to pay for her behaviour. I do think it's entirely appropriate to tell her that her behaviour is inappropriate, because it was. Decent people don't say and act as she did, and age has nothing to do with it. It's true, of course, that we nurses undertake an obligation to treat every patient with respect, and Triage did that, but we are certainly not under any obligation to humbly submit to any sort of abuse some patient may wish to heap upon us. I don't believe anyone can ever earn the "right" to behave contemptibly, and if they insist on doing so, they ought to expect to be looked upon with contempt.
  13. by   leslie :-D
    i agree with tom 100%.
    yes, i do think just by virtue of being 90 yo, there 'should' be a level of reverie and honor.
    our elderly are by far the least respected segment of society.
    old age has no place in the u.s.
    they live like paupers.
    they're literally pushed aside and are a devalued bunch, once they pass the torch to the younger generations.
    to add insult, many have lost their function, their homes, their autonomy.
    i see nothing wrong with being more tolerant of the elderly, if one cannot just respect them.
    sure there are times i've told different elderly pts "that is inappropriate", limit-setting, etc.
    but for the most part, they've told me to stick it up my arse.

    i am thinking of a hospice pt i had, who absolutely refused to be treated by male nurses, blacks, hispanics, jews and catholics!!!
    we just let her squawk but did not reassign staff.
    oh, she protested loudly, calling many every racial slur available.
    we all worked together and when she became vulgar, she would be told "enough! you are not permitted to use that language".
    with everyone on the same page, she quieted down but let her disdain be known in other ways-yet still, her behavior was much more acceptable.

    she squawked until she died.
    twas the nature of this 96 yo, 70 lb, rambunctious, little lady.
    but in spite of having such sass and blatant prejudice, she was treated with the highest of respect and honor.
    and that's the way i feel about our elderly.
    there should be some sense of entitlement.

    leslie

close