"Men should be EMT's or Doctors!" - page 2

So our floor had this little old lady who was basically your general pain in the keester. Declined meds, treatments, tests...and was needy as all get go but no one could satisfy her. Very bold... Read More

  1. by   nursemike
    I thought Triage handled it perfectly. The patient's preferrence was respected, but her abusive attitude toward a healthcare worker was not ignored. Mostly, though, the victim was supported by his colleague, which is, in my opinion, a big part of what this profession needs.

    I'm just coming off a fairly tough week. Nothing horrendous, but the kind that makes it all too tempting to see our patients as the enemy. No, of course it isn't really about us against them. We're for them, even when they drive us nuts, and whether they deserve it isn't even an issue. It comes with the territory. But a strong sense of "us" makes it a lot more bearable.
  2. by   Lacie
    Very good work on this one. I enjoyed this thread as my 76 year old mother had a triple A repair done last month. She has never been on pain meds or really had any other major health issues. During her 10 day hospital stay, about 5 of those she didnt have a clue where she was and insisted it was 1967. I attribute this to the PCA pump of MSO4 going of which she loved that button!!! Anyway she would continually try to climb out of bed or the chair insisting she was going home or elsewhere. She absolutely would not listen to any of the nurses and I was called numerous times to come to calm her. During one of these times a male nurse happened in to help get her back into the bed and let me tell you soon as he gave her a verbal order to calm down or sit down she immediately listened and gave NO PROBLEM!! So we found the key during her confusion was to have a male nurse and she did great. Soon as a female nurse came on then bam right back to the same old grind of confusion lol. So I guess it can go both ways when it's to the preferances and what works for a particular patient.
  3. by   West_Coast_Ken
    Quote from teeituptom
    At 90 years old, she should be allowed to feel what ever way she wants to feel. By God she has earned that right.She has served her time, paid her dues,and who knows what factors she faced while achieving her 90 years.
    She sure has the right to feel what she wants and to refuse care from anyone for any reason--period.

    She has Z-E-R-O, none!, right to be obnoxious to anyone for any reason--period. You'd think a 90 year-old would have learned that a looong time ago.

    I feel Triage and her co-worker did handle the situation well.
  4. by   vampiregirl
    Neat way of dealing with what sounds like a very challenging patient! I liked how the patient was encouraged to share some experiences from being a female editor in what was probably a very male orientated field at that time. That caused to patient to take a walk in the shoes of the male nurse. What a great technique to redirect a patient. Thanks for sharing this example.
  5. by   tddowney
    Quote from Lacie
    Very good work on this one. I enjoyed this thread as my 76 year old mother had a triple A repair done last month. She has never been on pain meds or really had any other major health issues. During her 10 day hospital stay, about 5 of those she didnt have a clue where she was and insisted it was 1967. I attribute this to the PCA pump of MSO4 going of which she loved that button!!! Anyway she would continually try to climb out of bed or the chair insisting she was going home or elsewhere. She absolutely would not listen to any of the nurses and I was called numerous times to come to calm her. During one of these times a male nurse happened in to help get her back into the bed and let me tell you soon as he gave her a verbal order to calm down or sit down she immediately listened and gave NO PROBLEM!! So we found the key during her confusion was to have a male nurse and she did great. Soon as a female nurse came on then bam right back to the same old grind of confusion lol. So I guess it can go both ways when it's to the preferances and what works for a particular patient.
    I'm an EMT in school to become an RN. So, I guess I'm half-ok with the former lady editor.

    Seriously, I've only had limited clinical experience so far, but sometimes I do have better luck as a male in getting compliance............so, I'll take the bad with the good. :spin:

    I do very much appreciate the approach Triage took with the lady. Having someone stick up for a colleague, male or female, is very heartening.
  6. by   jojotoo
    [quote=teeituptom]I look at things a little differently

    At 90 years old, she should be allowed to feel what ever way she wants to feel. By God she has earned that right.She has served her time, paid her dues,and who knows what factors she faced while achieving her 90 years.
    This world is big enough for all types, even me



    So, if she also rejected a nurse because of their race, would that be OK too? What if her assigned nurse had an accent and she didn't like that? How about if they were too tall, too short, too fat, too thin? What if her female nurse wasn't pretty enough? Or too pretty? Or too masculine? The list is endless. Except for certain modesty issues, which we try to accomodate when possible, the patient isn't going to dictate what type of nurse they will accept - not where I work.
  7. by   timdmb
    [quote=jojotoo]
    Quote from teeituptom
    I look at things a little differently

    At 90 years old, she should be allowed to feel what ever way she wants to feel. By God she has earned that right.She has served her time, paid her dues,and who knows what factors she faced while achieving her 90 years.
    This world is big enough for all types, even me



    So, if she also rejected a nurse because of their race, would that be OK too? What if her assigned nurse had an accent and she didn't like that? How about if they were too tall, too short, too fat, too thin? What if her female nurse wasn't pretty enough? Or too pretty? Or too masculine? The list is endless. Except for certain modesty issues, which we try to accomodate when possible, the patient isn't going to dictate what type of nurse they will accept - not where I work.
    i agree with you...
  8. by   zenman
    I don't think women should be newspaper editors
  9. by   flashpoint
    I don't think it is OK for anyone to refuse care from someone based on gender, race, weight, etc...however, if someone is uncomfortable with a staff member for any reason, there should be an effort to change the assignment. We once had a lady who didn't want "that little Hispanic girl" taking care of her. The charge nurse told her that she was not going to change assignments and the Hispanic nurse continued to care for her. The patient fell, breaking her right hip and both wrists...and she was convinced that it wouldn't have happened if "that little Hispanic girl" hadn't been her nurse. The lawsuit is still pending. I don't think I would ever sue over a medical mistake or something like a fall in the hospital, but if I had raised an objection to whoever was caring for me when the incident happened, I might think about it.
  10. by   Spritenurse1210
    No accounting for small minded people
  11. by   RN34TX
    Quote from West_Coast_Ken
    She sure has the right to feel what she wants and to refuse care from anyone for any reason--period.

    She has Z-E-R-O, none!, right to be obnoxious to anyone for any reason--period. You'd think a 90 year-old would have learned that a looong time ago.
    I agree.
    But unfortunately, age sometimes is used as a carte blanche to actually regress and no longer be held accountable for things like setting a good example for the younger generation, manners, etc.

    No matter how old you get, you have never "earned" the right to abuse and discriminate against others. If anything, you should be held to a higher standard due to your years of accumulated wisdom.

    You can't take credit for being old and therefore "wise" and command respect, yet act like a demanding child when the mood suits you.

    As long as you are still in your right mind, all of us should always be at least attempting to set a good example for the next generation, whether that be in terms of age or in terms of new generations of nurses.

    In my nursing home days, I long held my tongue and tolerated plenty of the racist and homophobic ignorant comments from the residents and just dismissed most of it as a result of their generation and upbringing.

    I realize that it's hard to break what has been put into your head from the time you were born, but there comes a time to take responsibility for the person you've become, whether you are 20 or 90.
  12. by   smk1
    My favorite nurse to work with at clinical is a male. He is patient, knows what he is doing, doesn't try to get us to do things outside of our scope and the patients all like him because he is just a very nice person. We all love it when our patient is assigned to him. There is another nurse that I love to follow around too even though I have never been assigned to her. She is just a born teacher. Having a penis shouldn't preclude someone from being a nurse. If you have the knowledge, intelligence, skills and compassion to do the job then that's all I can ask.
  13. by   Antikigirl
    Great responses guys!

    The lady really got her two cents from medics when she kept declining all her treatment. One even said to her that if she is okay enough to not need all this then she should go home. Okay that may be true..but ouch, seemed rather harsh to me! So I tried a different approach...try to help pt and my collegue. I think I did a-okay!

    I have worked in LTC/ALF and I too know my share of patients having their minds set on certain social factors that are no longer tollerated by the general public. That is why I took a person proactive stance and just brought up items in her history and mind to open it up to think for herself. I didn't lecture her, berate her for what she said...just talked with her during assessment and shared stories...and at all times respecting her rights...even if she still came to the wrong conclusion...she has that right (not to harass though). Lecturing causes a defensive reaction, though and poliet conversation can do wonders .

    It was actually our charge nurse that wanted the incident report to be filled out. Proably so that the MD in charge of her actually saw it. Not that all MD's read our notes about these things (they call it a nursing probelm and pass the buck back!). After three days of total declination of items (I was off during the first two days) and all treatments...I think that was fair since she was rude and very outspoken about anyone that came in.

    But I guess at the time, my anger over that comment took a purely back seat. I found out this very independant woman is going to have to live in a nursing home from now on. Okay...that is depressing and scary to folks. I didn't want to upset her anymore with a lecture on how to act...just open conversation with a hidden lesson inside for her to chew on.

    I do fear for the nursing home she goes to though...ouch, that one is going to be time consuming and non-compliant. I also fear that she will get kicked out of homes over and over again for non compliance...very sad. (our homes lately are kicking people out for almost anything...some have been kicked out for certain antibiotics/meds not covered by insurance and they say they can't take them anymore???).

    Oh well...I think I handled this one better than most of my collegues that either wouldn't go into the room or lectured her. At least I got her to change her mind to the point she would bring it down a notch or two.

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