"Honey" - page 3

After seeing coworkers call 85 year old women honey, and after being called honey by people my age (I'm only 23) I'm pretty much ready to puke. Do people really not know how patronizing that is? I... Read More

  1. by   nuangel1
    its not a big deal to me .i have had pts call me dearie sweetie or hon.i don't mind .sometimes i call my pt's male =handsome or female hon but i don't mean anything by it.certainly if pt said din't like it i wouldn't do it.
  2. by   tofutti
    Our CNA instructors also stressed that we never used those terms. But in the real world of the nursing home, residents and staff called each other endearments all the time.

    I also got over being called "the girls." In fact you can call me girl anytime! Beats "Ma'am".

    However, I used to work for an M.D. who called me young lady, and I always wanted to call him "old man" back.

    I found myself in some situations of cleaning up a really gross personal mess for someone, that I felt like calling them honey to reassure them that they were seen fondly regardless of the circumstances.
    Last edit by tofutti on Sep 21, '06
  3. by   Quickbeam
    I try and lead by example. I use respectful speech and formal address. What people call me? I let it go. It does bother me when people are overly familiar with elders.
  4. by   banditrn
    Quote from bethin
    When I took my CNA classes we were told explicitly to never call a patient honey or sweetie. I heeded the advice and have never used the term. If you can't remember a pt's name, then call them sir or ma'm. I too have been called sweetie as a patient and it drove me nuts.
    I was also taught this when I went thru my nursing classes. Had a co-worker once who called everyone by their last name - it irritated me no end.
  5. by   traumaRUs
    Someone at the dialysis unit calls me "young lady" - I'm old enough to appreciate it and laugh.

    However, in the 10 years that I worked in the ER, I would have been happy to have been called sweetie or honey but nope, got called some really bad names.
  6. by   bagladyrn
    For me, it's a very deeply ingrained habit - calling people "Hon". I was raised in Baltimore where it's just part of everyday speech (especially if you are from south Baltimore). No- it's not gender or age specific - everyone is addressed that way. They even have an event called the "Hon Fest" and yes, I've got the t-shirt!
    Fortunately most of my OB patients are as young as or younger than my son, so they don't seem to take offense - those without family support seem to appreciate the more personal touch. We won't even go into the kind of terms of endearment I use talking to the newborns!
  7. by   nurse4theplanet
    In the south, it is part of the relaxed/familiar culture to use such terms and I have rarely been offended and have never been told that my use of such terms has been offensive. I tried to be aware of others and I am young, so I find it more appropriate to address most as "Mr. or Mrs. So and So...." But because of the culture, I don't personally find it patronizing....but sometimes one's tone will be a more accurate portrayl of whether it was used in a friendly manner or condescending manner.
  8. by   anamnesis2
    Amen!
  9. by   meownsmile
    I see there are a few others also that were taught NOT to address patients in terms that could be considered patronizing. They are in a position of being vulnerable anyway. It was made very clear to us while in school.
    I know people address others in those terms and i myself dont necissarily consider it patronizing. But in a professional nurse/patient relationship i think addressing someone as sir, mame, or mr/mrs is a tad more professional. We have to consider where we work (LTC vs acute care) and who our patients are i think.
  10. by   Sirius Black
    Quote from bethin
    When I took my CNA classes we were told explicitly to never call a patient honey or sweetie. I heeded the advice and have never used the term. If you can't remember a pt's name, then call them sir or ma'm. I too have been called sweetie as a patient and it drove me nuts.


    I'm a nursing student and we were told this prior to going out on our first year placements last year. We've been told to greet the patient/resident as
    Mr. Mrs. Ms. Miss _______ the first time, then ask what they preferred to be called and do so.
  11. by   BabyRN2Be
    I don't get bent out of shape if someone calls me "honey." But I guess it depends on the person doing it. If the person is younger than me and calls me that, it sort of bothers me more than an older person doing so. And some people don't do it to be berating, some people aren't great with names.

    Unless I know the person, I do not address geriatric patients as "honey." They don't seem to mind it once I've gotten to know them, but I wouldn't call them sweetie or honey right off the bat. And I certainly don't mind being called "honey" by LTC residents.

    I guess it depends on the person and this is just my own viewpoint.
  12. by   TheCommuter
    Quote from lovingtheunloved
    After seeing coworkers call 85 year old women honey, and after being called honey by people my age (I'm only 23) I'm pretty much ready to puke. Do people really not know how patronizing that is? I just got out of lab and was ready to choke the little 20 year old know it all who insisted on calling me honey as she incorrectly corrected me. Am I alone in this?
    I consider 'honey' to be an endearment and, personally, I don't mind if someone calls me by that name. I would never, however, call any one of my elderly residents 'honey' because it undermines their age.
  13. by   emllpn2006
    I could not but help to think about this thread today. I am currently working in a collections department for a major car company while searching for a nursing job. My customer kept calling me youngn. It ammused a little when I looked up her birthdate and she was 5 years older than me.

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