"Honey" - page 2

After seeing coworkers call 85 year old women honey, and after being called honey by people my age (I'm only 23) I'm pretty much ready to puke. Do people really not know how patronizing that is? I... Read More

  1. by   Tweety
    Quote from Marie_LPN
    Just because some people don't like being called "honey", or calling others "honey", doesn't mean they should "get over it" if other people do not see things from their point of view.

    Agreed.
  2. by   Tweety
    Quote from hyperstudent
    I am just stating that in life, especially in nursing, there is always bigger issues. If you are going to be upset by people using terms of enderment, then you need to reevaluate what is and what is not important!

    It was important enough for this poster to get feedback. I doubt that she's loosing sleep over it, or that it's very high on her priority list of what is and isn't important, she's merely venting something that irritates her. We all have live our own lives and come to our own decisions about what is important to us as individuals and we must respect our differences.

    If the original poster walks around all day getting patronized to (it's by her definition, not ours) then we need to respect that.
    Last edit by Tweety on Sep 21, '06
  3. by   Marie_LPN, RN
    Quote from Tweety
    It was important enough for this poster to get feedback. I doubt that she's loosing sleep over it, or that it's very high on her priority list of what is and isn't important, she's merely venting something that irritates her. We all have live our own lives and come to our own decisions about what is important to us as individuals and we must respect our differences.

    If the original poster walks around all day getting patronized to (it's by her definition, not ours) then we need to respect that.
    :yeahthat:
  4. by   angel337
    i don't think it's a big deal. but then again that's just my opinion. when people... especially coworkers call you anything other than your given name, just correct them..they will get the point eventually.
  5. by   widi96
    I call my co-workers by their first names unless I am close enough with them to call them otherwise. As for patients, it depends on the patient. Usually its sir or ma'am, but if they are smiling and very informal, that seems a little inappropriate and I do tend to call them "hon". I don't get offended when people call me something like that, but if it bothers you, maybe you should say something to them about it. If it is a patient you are only going to see for a couple of hours and probably never see again (I work in an ER so several of our patients are like this), I wouldn't get to uppity about how they address you (assuming it is still a friendly greeting), but if it is a patient in a LTC facillity or someone you are going to be working with for an extended period of time, then go ahead and say something. If someone is comfortable enough with you to call you these endearing names, they should be comfortable enough to respect your wishes.
  6. by   leslie :-D
    Quote from Marie_LPN
    Just because some people don't like being called "honey", or calling others "honey", doesn't mean they should "get over it" if other people do not see things from their point of view.
    thank you marie.
    call me old-fashioned, but i find it disrespectful to refer to an elder as "honey" or any other overly familiar endearment.
    "thank you hon"...."be prayin' for you hon"... don't care for it at all.
    sounds phony, insincere and presumptuous.
    and if a youngin' ever called me "hon", i'd lean him over my knee and give him a whoopin'.
    don't mind it at all, when an elder refers to me in this context.

    leslie
  7. by   Vagon
    Being male is nice sometimes.

    While im usually not called any of these names, i understand where you're coming from. Sometimes it's harmless, other times it's an annoyance. With strangers I'd probably just leave it. Correcting them would probably lead to more drama than it's worth. With people you will be working with for a long while then sure, go on and tell them if it offends you. Just my take on things. Life's too short to let little things upset you.
  8. by   acgemt
    I will say that normally it does not bother me to be called dear or honey. I say sweetie or handsome sometimes to the more elderly population. They seem to like it. I will say that on a particular evening, for whatever reason, this was not the case for me. I remember a patient who was very rude to begin with (in the ER for shortness of breath...and wound up signing out AMA anyway) had called me baby. For some reason, it struck a nerve that night. I corrected her, stating that my name was ______, and that I was the nurse taking care of her. Yeah...that didn't go over well. Very irrate, telling me to "Back your @ss on outta this room!!" (Yes, everyone heard that one!). Needless to say, it does get to me on occasion, but usually it doesn't. I would rather be called dear than the B word.
  9. by   LeahJet
    In general, it doesn't bother me.

    There are some circumstances, though, that are somewhat offensive to me. I know I may sound silly...but men (or even women) in some sort of position of authority.
    For example, an MD saying "No, dear, I said 4.0 Prolene". There is more than a hint of condescension in that context.
  10. by   leslie :-D
    Quote from hyperstudent
    I am just stating that in life, especially in nursing, there is always bigger issues. If you are going to be upset by people using terms of enderment, then you need to reevaluate what is and what is not important!
    ideally, endearments should be used towards those you endear.
    otherwise, some may become annoyed at its' perceived insincerity.
    if a nurse who was half my age, referred to me as hon, i would have no problem asking her not to use that word. no big drama. just a personal preference.
    and other than giving our elderly carte blanche in using these endearments, i just can't appreciate being called darling, honey, poopsiepie by someone that doesn't even know me, never mind genuinely 'endear' me.

    so i suppose it's situational.
    generally i'm against it.
    but in asserting my preferences, it needs not be equated with battle material..
    ok girl?
    Last edit by Tweety on Sep 21, '06
  11. by   bethin
    When I took my CNA classes we were told explicitly to never call a patient honey or sweetie. I heeded the advice and have never used the term. If you can't remember a pt's name, then call them sir or ma'm. I too have been called sweetie as a patient and it drove me nuts.
  12. by   lovingtheunloved
    Quote from earle58
    ideally, endearments should be used towards those you endear.
    otherwise, some may become annoyed at its' perceived insincerity.
    if a nurse who was half my age, referred to me as hon, i would have no problem asking her not to use that word. no big drama. just a personal preference.
    and other than giving our elderly carte blanche in using these endearments, i just can't appreciate being called darling, honey, poopsiepie by someone that doesn't even know me, never mind genuinely 'endear' me.

    so i suppose it's situational.
    generally i'm against it.
    but in asserting my preferences, it needs not be equated with battle material..
    ok girl?
    :yeahthat: The particular person that irritated me is a fellow student that I don't know well.

    And hyperstudent, as Tweety said, I'm not losing sleep over it. I vented for 4 lines of text on a bulletin board. What bothers you won't necessarily bother me, but I will be kind enough not mock you for it.
  13. by   slinkeecat
    I just want to be called "mattress kitten" lol... There are days when I would rather my patient did not know my name!!! LOL "hon" could be anyone, but when they keep yelling your name down the hall when your w/ another pt. trying to do a IVP or hanging blood it can be unnerving.

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