"Bad" Evaluation..I'm So Frustrated and ready to quit!! - page 3
I transferred to my hospital's ICU/CCU at the end of February. Anytime a nurse transfers departments, they evaluate you at 45 and 90 days after you started the new job. I've been an RN for 5 years... Read More
Jun 14, '02Kelly, many here have told you to "hang-in-there" so-to-speak, however, if I were in the position you are in, I'd quit! Sorry to be so blunt and perhaps adverse but if more people would "quit" when confronted with these situations, management might start to pay attention to the real reason for the shortages.
Jun 14, '02Kelly
I don't know where you live but if there is a local chapter of AACN (Amer Association of Critical Care Nurses), you should look into joining! When I got a job in an ICU [which I ended up leaving after 3 months --long story ] one of the first things I did was join my local chapter. I am fortunate b/c I have met many wonderful people through my involvement with AACN and even have gone to NTI (the national conference) the last 2 years. Hopefully you can meet some RN's who are supportive and willing to be a mentor to you. Good luck and feel free to email me privately if you want to know more about my chapter, etc.
Jun 14, '02I wish I could say something helpful, Kelly, but what I can say is I do know how you feel as I was stuck in a small ICU with 2 witches once and it wasn't fun.... They were both burnt out, and i did eventually get to a 'tolerant place' with them once i understood all their numerous problems. Believe it or not, one of them quit and the remaining one immediately began to complain about how negative the other was...LOL! She soon left too. <whew> !
Any chance you can ask to go back to days where there aren't personality conflicts? Sometimes a different shift makes all the difference....you do need to stand up to them, though, sounds like they are bullies.
Some nurses just are NOT good preceptors and I wish to God theey would just ADMIT it and stop harassing our youngun's!!!
Best wishes..I know this isn't easy. (((HUGS))) Find some good folks to stick to...and if there aren't any...well maybe it is best to move on to a more positive place...
Jun 14, '02I HAVE HAD THE SAME TYPE OF PROBEM--AND ONCE EVEN THE OPPOSITE!!!
AS A BRAND-NEW GRAD I GOT ABOUT 3-4 WEEKS ORIENTATION AND WAS TURNED OUT TO THE WOLVES!!! AT MY 6 MOMTH ORIENTATION, I WAS TOLD THAT I ASK"TOOMANY" QUESTIONS!!!
CAN YOU BELEIVE THAT ONE!!!!????
I WAS TALKING ONE NIGHT WITH A 25 YEAR NURSING VETERAN, TELLING HER THE STORY AND I THOUGHT SHE WOULD FALL OUT OF HER CHAIR!!
TAKE IT WASY AND KEEP YOUR CHIN UP!!!!
SOON, THEY WILL REALIZE WHAT A TRUE ASSET YOU ARE!!!!!
Jun 14, '02i'm going into nursing as a second career. i worked infor many years teachers act the same way nasty! if you have a unique personality or any thing they can pick on they will. I see the same thing go on everywhere in jobs. try to blend into the woodwork and not be noticed they probably are worried you'll do a better job than them and have a more interesting personality. and so they stuck it to ya to destroy your enthusiam for your future
Jun 14, '02Kelly, if ICU is where you want to be hang in there. In a similar situation I allowed the nurses involved to intimidate me into leaving ICU and returning to the ward I had been on before. Unfortunately I didn't realize how much support I had there from the majority of nurse until after I'd gone. About 3 months after I had left one of my patients on the ward coded. The ICU nurse who came to the code took me aside after and told me I had done well and why didn't I come back to ICU. Even 6 years later ICU nurses I worked with back then still tell me I should come back!
I think what often happens is that the "difficult to work with" nurses end up all together as most others try to move to other shifts. This also means new staff often end up working with this "select" group.
Hang in there and good luck.
Jun 14, '02Eleanor Roosevelt once said that "no one can intimidate you without your permission." It is so important NOT to give anyone permission to intimidate you! Please remember that when working with people who try to do that to you.
Jun 14, '02Originally posted by Jenny P
Eleanor Roosevelt once said that "no one can intimidate you without your permission." It is so important NOT to give anyone permission to intimidate you!
i once dreamed up some kinda of mafia association that would specialize in taking care of these scenarios for the benifit of everyones mental health. Who can help both the attacking nurse and the victum nurses when this stuff goes on in semi-secrecy?
Like, some kind of "monitor" that is familiar with these work environments and mechanics, who could serve as a liason between new nurses under attack and their base. i guess I've said enough now. Thank you all for letting me chime in here
Jun 15, '02Hey Mario, can you arrange some Mafia association to take care of the cannibal nurses? That would be cool!
Jun 15, '02Kelly, I know exactly how you feel. Nothing's worse than to be the goldfish in the shark pond. And in 36 years of working, I've seen my share of sharks. If they can't get at you professionally, they get at you personally. I have a few suggestions.
Someone here has suggested connecting with your specialty's professional group. Let them take you under their wing. Network, network, network, girl.
Take some specialty courses, you can take them by distance education if there's nothing available in your neck of the woods. Show your certificates to your HN. Go to seminars, in-services.
I wouldn't suggest cooking for the sharks. To me, that would come across as apologizing for existing. The occasional doughnut does work wonders, however. But don't kiss-up.
I would approach the #1 bytch and say something like "I understand that you gave me a poor evaluation after working such a short time on your shift. I realize that I should not take this personally, that this was just my first evaluation for night shift, but I FEEL as if you believe that I will never become competent to work in this unit. I FEEL as if you believe that I should be an expert right away, rather than being allowed time to learn. I FEEL hurt and embarrassed, as if you want me to be a failure here. Did you really mean for me to FEEL this way, and if so, why?" Always talk about how you feel, as that is subjective and not something that she can deny. Also lets her get a good look (okay, maybe she won't look) on how she appears to you.
Lastly, and since I'm only 5'1 1/2", my best advice is to learn to spit in their eye, upward if you have to.Last edit by jurbyjunk on Jun 15, '02
Jun 15, '02Sorry that these people are being nasty to you. That is uncalled for! I often wonder if nurses such as they ever read these boards and perhaps recognize themselves. One can only hope! Hang tough! Take care and God bless.
Jun 15, '02Oh, yes, I know that there are some times for a "write up" and possibly a negative slanted eval, but come on folks.....
We all know that that is minimal to what is going on here .......
sometimes I get so frustrated and angry that it never seems to change.....nurses and other disciplines seem to eat each other and their young without any regard.........
It makes me want to kick some a......., but I "preach" nonviolence.....
like I wanna be part of the solution, not the problem.....
but I still somedays wanna kick some a....
one time ...instead.....I told the c/o one.......and if you have to, please write me up.....it would be quicker than all this p & m..........
and one time I had variance reports out and ready to hand to the c/o ones as that seems to be another way that they love to attack.........
but instead, all I can say is STAND UP FOR YOURSELF, Kelly, Mario and any and all others.........
You know your worth, your value to yourself, the team, the patients and your potential.....
There are more teamworkers and supporters of each other out there than what it seems some days........
and it is like everybody is stressed out of their minds with all the stressors of health care and this fast paced rat race we all find outselves in.....
We have all been there and will be again,
Eleanor Roosevelt was so right, but sometimes within our system, it just seems so much some days.....like the intensity and technicality, let alone the life/death and emotional issues we deal with are not enough........
so I advocate........
silent strikes with a klingon cloaked war ship.......
i did not mean to say that.......
what I recommend is to stand up for yourself,
find a place where professionalism and teamwork is indeed strived for.......
do not join the ranks of the cannibals.....
and hey, all if you haven't seen this site.....check it out.........
go to whatever search engines that you like and
look up bullying at workplace, etc.....
you will find the site from the UK.......it is rather extensive and also has a connected site about nurses, let alone much more.......
sadly to say, this is not a new phenomen and doesn't seem to be going away either, but
love and peace to all:kissLast edit by micro on Jun 15, '02
Jun 15, '02our jobs are not difficult enough, we need to look at our sisters to make things worse. they teach us to work on defense. the best thing you can do is stand your ground. you know you are a good nurse....you know you have good assessment skills..DONT LET THEM TAKE THAT AWAY FROM YOU!
i would not sign the evaluation unless you were able to write your side of the story and that you disagree.
some of the people i work with kept holding up hoops for me to jump thru...i put them around their necks and pulled.
i dont jump thru hoops.
some of what they said about me was true and although i sure wasnt going to admit it at my eval...i used that info to make me a better nurse.
this will pass...its just getting thru it. you will tho. and ppl like that ALWAYS get theirs...all you have to do is wait.