[jnette]

Fatal Things to Say If Your Wife is Pregnant

"I finished the Oreos."

"Not to imply anything, but I don't think the kid weighs forty pounds."


"Y'know, looking at her, you'd never guess that Pamela Lee had a baby..!!"


"I sure hope your thighs aren't gonna stay that flabby forever!"


"Well, couldn't they induce labor? The 25th is the Super Bowl."


"Darned if you ain't about five pounds away from a surprise visit from that Richard Simmons fella."


"Are your ankles supposed to look like that?"


"Get your *own* ice cream."


"Geez, you're awfully puffy looking today."


"Got milk?"


"Maybe we should name the baby after my secretary, Tawney."


"You don't have the guts to pull the trigger..."

[misschelei]

"You're having a C-Section so you're not actually giving birth."

[donster]

Too funny, Jnette!!!

[suzy253]

thanks for the smile Netters

[karenG]

this is sad but true........

at my ante natal class many years ago... we were being taught the breathing etc to do in labour... one of the dads looked at his wife and asked how bad the pain was.... the midwife said .. bad... so the dad asked if it was like bad period pain........ the midwife said.. you've never had period pains and believe me its much worse. the dad looked at his very pregnant wife and said 'cant be that bad.. I'm sure a couple of paractemol will do the trick.... how bad can it be??' He walked home that night!!

Karen

[madwife2002]

Originally Posted by karenG

this is sad but true........

at my ante natal class many years ago... we were being taught the breathing etc to do in labour... one of the dads looked at his wife and asked how bad the pain was.... the midwife said .. bad... so the dad asked if it was like bad period pain........ the midwife said.. you've never had period pains and believe me its much worse. the dad looked at his very pregnant wife and said 'cant be that bad.. I'm sure a couple of paractemol will do the trick.... how bad can it be??' He walked home that night!!

Karen

With an axe in the middle of his head-and a couple of paracetamols for pain relief

[jnette]

Originally Posted by madwife2002

With an axe in the middle of his head-and a couple of paracetamols for pain relief

[earle58]

or "i've heard this is comparable to passing kidney stones" is what my ob said to me during excruciating active labor.
he was at the foot of the bed, breaking my water and i gave him such a kick to his shoulder it sent him falling back.
i'm telling you guys, do NOT mess with a pregnant woman, ESPECIALLY when in labor.

leslie

[unknown99]

another one they should not say...
"What are you crying for?"

[SharonH, RN]

Oh dear, those are too funny!