[tattooednursie]

I don't think I have any, and If I do I don't think I should. Every single time in my life that I have gotten a single shred of confidence in myself, it will disappear just like that. I just went back to school yesterday feeling all rested and ready, and then I come back the next day, and it was so crazy it felt like my first clinical ever!!! I had a total melt down in front of the entire class . . . Nothing major happened that would set me off . . .It was just a bunch of little stupid things. They say don't sweat the small stuff, but I do. The small stuff leads to big stuff that causes you not to get your work done. It wouldn't have gotten to me if I wasn't so close to the end, and I had this meltdown with only two patients under my care . . . Geez! I wonder what kind of breakdown I will have when I take on 5 pt's total care, meds, baths, treatments, EVERYTHING! The most I have had under my care as a nursing student was 3. That there was another melt down, and I ended up turning all my work in very late . . . Its crazy just how much homework I have for each one!!! Now I feel like . . . If i don't make it, I don't graduate, if I don't graduate, these last two years have been a total waste of my time. GRRRR
Thanks for letting me vent . . . .

[zoeboboey]

Originally Posted by FutureRN_Mandi

I don't think I have any, and If I do I don't think I should. Every single time in my life that I have gotten a single shred of confidence in myself, it will disappear just like that. I just went back to school yesterday feeling all rested and ready, and then I come back the next day, and it was so crazy it felt like my first clinical ever!!! I had a total melt down in front of the entire class . . . Nothing major happened that would set me off . . .It was just a bunch of little stupid things. They say don't sweat the small stuff, but I do. The small stuff leads to big stuff that causes you not to get your work done. It wouldn't have gotten to me if I wasn't so close to the end, and I had this meltdown with only two patients under my care . . . Geez! I wonder what kind of breakdown I will have when I take on 5 pt's total care, meds, baths, treatments, EVERYTHING! The most I have had under my care as a nursing student was 3. That there was another melt down, and I ended up turning all my work in very late . . . Its crazy just how much homework I have for each one!!! Now I feel like . . . If i don't make it, I don't graduate, if I don't graduate, these last two years have been a total waste of my time. GRRRR
Thanks for letting me vent . . . .

I felt like that all the time in nursing school. I think the worst part was thinking that it "showed", that people could "tell" that I was losing it. So that would make me more anxious/less confident.

But the feedback I got all the time was that I was doing fine, that I DIDn't look as bad off as I felt (lol) - hey, even as a nurse we have days where it feels like we haven't done anything right. But usually the words "feels like" have no basis in reality.

Hang in -
z

[muffie]

[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[mandi]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]

hang in there kiddo

[tattooednursie]

Thank you Zoe and Muffie. i appreciate your encouragement. I went back today . . . even though I had the strong urge to just not go. i did go, and I had a MUCH better day than I had yesterday.

[JBudd]

". . Geez! I wonder what kind of breakdown I will have when I take on 5 pt's total care, meds, baths, treatments, EVERYTHING! . . Its crazy just how much homework I have for each one!!! "

Well, the good news is, you don't have to do homework after you graduate!
In any good hospital you won't have to take on 5 (more likely 6 or 7) right away. You'll have a preceptor, and work together, starting with observing how she does it, gradually moving into doing it with her observing. If you aren't offered an orientation of 4-6 months as a new grad, get a first job somewhere else. My hosp. tailors orientation to the nurse, newbies get 6 months, by the end of orientation our newbies have been carrying a load and we all wonder why they are still on orientation.

[hassled]

I've been much like you, lack of confidence. The hardest thing to handle is what if people can see you losing it. Get back on the bike and try agauin tomorrow. Tomororrow I have an interview for pool nursing. I have also put in for a a part time position in surgical. I currently work about 18 hours per fortnight as a school nurse but I need the wider and more varied experience. As a pool nurse I will be a supernumery for two days. Can anyone explain what this actually is? I know it means additional to staff numbers but I am just not certain what it entails. Can anyone tell me please.? I am looking forward to getting work but nervous but I have to do this and believe in myself that I can handle it.

[zoeboboey]

Originally Posted by hassled

I've been much like you, lack of confidence. The hardest thing to handle is what if people can see you losing it. Get back on the bike and try agauin tomorrow. Tomororrow I have an interview for pool nursing. I have also put in for a a part time position in surgical. I currently work about 18 hours per fortnight as a school nurse but I need the wider and more varied experience. As a pool nurse I will be a supernumery for two days. Can anyone explain what this actually is? I know it means additional to staff numbers but I am just not certain what it entails. Can anyone tell me please.? I am looking forward to getting work but nervous but I have to do this and believe in myself that I can handle it.

I don't know what it means, but I wish you good luck!