[zuzi]

Nursemike trying to not be rude, I will (whishing to helping you to not mess your mind) and telling you that science and good sense are two different notions. Happy to discuss with you always about any personality disorder that you are interested but only on scientific bases.

[canoehead]

I want to be mildly manic, that happy euphoria stage before the hallucinations and pain. I once hallucinated for a day (drug induced) and it was my own little freaky world. Rough day because the floor was too fecking bumpy to walk comfortably, and the walls were moving in and out. Plus I couldn't read safety signs with all that movement...I wanted to be a responsible nutcase, heehee.

[Thunderwolf]

nursemike, thank you for this thread of discussion. I certainly can see both sides of the arguements elaborated on this thread. The thing about mental/emotional illnesses (personality disorders included) is that folks may have a tendency NOT to talk about them due to shame or fear. Education and discussion are the keys to raising our understanding and empathy about them. So, they do need discussed from time to time. Of course, this needs to be done in a way which allows safe dialogs to occur. Personality disorders are tremendously anxiety producing. And depending upon which personality disorder will dictate who will have the most anxiety...the patient and/or loved ones. Antisocial personality disorders tend not to exhibit much anxiety because of their lack of empathy inherent in the disorder...but often create lots of anxieties for loved ones. The Obsessive Compulsive personality disorder lives in a daily basis of anxiety and so too do their loved ones who are at their wits end trying to adapt around that lifestyle. Narcissistic personality disorders tend to experience their anxieties when others do not see "their importance" to the world and then become righteously angry because of it....it is not easy being a loved one walking on eggshells or living with the temper tantrums. Borderline personality disorders are fraught with lots of anxieties much due to fear of feeling out of emotional control or others having too much of it...chaos may be chaos and uncomfortable, but at least it is familiar....putting them at additional risk of being abandoned by loved ones because they just can't handle it any more...which just escalates the Borderline person's fear factor and acting out even more....a vicious cycle. So, mikenurse, at the very least, I wish to commend you for attempting a dialog regarding this type of discussion. As care givers, folks struggling with personality disorders (as our patients) can be such a mysterious thing at times, if not energy draining...so we need to understand them in order to best provide care to them. Persons with personality disorders do not only frequent our psych units, but our medical and med-surg floors as well. We got to know a little bit about them....if not to preserve our own sanities. Also, just like any mental or emotional illness, there are degrees of severity....not all, for example, Histrionic personality disorders are alike in presentation or severity....it is in degrees....just like depression....mild, moderate, and severe. Folks forget this little pearl. And lastly, I highly commend you, nursemike, for sharing your own heart in complete sincerity that you meant no offense. I totally believe you in that. Offensive is not your way....I have read your various posts on the board...your sincerity often stands out.

[nursemike]

Many thanks for the kind words. I think a couple of posters took it as intended--it would be nice to be able to shift in that direction, maybe even a little farther than is usually acceptable, at least for a time. In at least some instances, a mental illness can seem to be an exaggeration of a trait that can be part of mental health. It's probably simplistic to look at the behavior and not the underlying pathology. OCD looks funny on the tv show "Monk" because we aren't seeing the crushing anxiety.
I tend to think of myself as enlightened because I don't care for the comedy of Jerry Lewis (or a perhaps less dated example, Carlos Mencia). But I do regret not considering that my post could be seen in the same light, particularly to someone who might be dealing with such issues in themselves or a loved one. I appreciate all who understand that I didn't intend to be malicious, even if it had that effect.

Perhaps, in the future, I will concentrate on emulating mental health. That would be an accomplishment, in its own right.

[Thunderwolf]

And you are most welcome....and I meant what I said about you here....it is not your style.

You mentioned:

an exaggeration of a trait

and in many ways this is true for a person with PD...a trait we all have but held rigidly which often generates anxiety and then begins fueling the intensity of it even more. As a result, it warps the rest of the person's personality. The slight exception to the rule is Antisocial PD...anxiety is most only created if they are caught misbehaving...not because of it. This is due, again, to the lack of empathy...with a care-less attitude how they exploit others.

I have always enjoyed your postings...continue, my friend. The thread is in good hands...I have you to thank.

Peace

[nursemike]

Originally Posted by canoehead

I want to be mildly manic, that happy euphoria stage before the hallucinations and pain. I once hallucinated for a day (drug induced) and it was my own little freaky world. Rough day because the floor was too fecking bumpy to walk comfortably, and the walls were moving in and out. Plus I couldn't read safety signs with all that movement...I wanted to be a responsible nutcase, heehee.

I once read a review of Crime and Punishment that said the first hundred pages or so were nearly unreadable, but after that, it was one of the greatest novels in literature. My first attempt to read it didn't get past those first hundred pages, so a few years ago, when I was in bed with the flu and had nothing else to do, I decided to try it again.
One morning, I woke around 0800, had a slice of toast and a cup of tea, then curled up in bed to read some more. Intermittently dozing, I read through the chapters where the protagonist was suffering from "brain fever." A little past noon, I put the book aside, glanced at my clock, and thought, "Good Lord! I've been delirious for the past four hours!" Then, to my relief, I realized, "No, Roskalnakov (sp?) was delirous." Then I took some Tylenol, prn existential ambiguity. Never had any drug-induced hallucinations, though,