[BizzieRN]

I work for a rapidly growing research company and I am the only RN on nights. About two months ago I requested leave a month in advance, for two days off. One week before my leave was due I get a letter from my nurse manager saying she couldnt grant my leave. Reason behind it was because no other RN was willing to take up my shift for those days. Okay so I missed out on precious time with my fiance, who is a marine stationed far away from me. He was only in town for a week, and I only requested two days off. That was strike one....
Strike two! I put in two days of leave about two weeks ago (kind of short notice, I know) for a spur of the moment family event for this upcoming weekend May 17-19. Surprise! Last night I got a note from my manager stating my leave was denied! My family is extremely upset, seeing as I will not be at a remembrance for my older brother who passed away.
Seeing as I have a wedding coming up, a honeymoon, and all that goes with that, I am quite worried about getting leave for these things. Day shift and evening shift RNs have NO problem getting their leave approved.

My questions to you all are:
Do any other night shift nurses have problems with getting the leave they request?
What do you think I should do?
Isn't it a nurse manager's job to help out when needed? So doesn't that included giving your primary night shift nurse a break and maybe take her shift for two nights????

Let me know what you think. I am a valuable employee to this company, and I really don't want to quit over something as stupid and childish, like not getting my way with my leave. But I have missed out on two very important events already this year

[llg]

You need to have a "sit down" talk with your manager and ask her to clarify for you how, when, etc. you will be able to take leave time. Also ask her to clarify how MUCH time you are allowed to take. Be sure you understand her process and be sure to follow it to the letter in the future. While it is reasonable for you to expect to be able to take a certain amount of leave time ... your employer has the right to establish reasonable leave request procedures.

Once you are sure that you are both on the same page regarding the procedures, amount of time off allowed, etc. ... Then you need to make a judgment as to whether or not you can live with your employer's expectations and procedures.

If your previous requests were consistent with your employer's expectations/procedures, etc. ... then you need to tell your supervisor how much it hurt you and your family that she was not allowing you to take the time off to which you are entitled. Emphasize how much you like your job and want to stay, but express that you and she need to work together to find a way to let you take some time off in the future so that you can maintain a reasonable personal life. If she is a reasonble person, the two of you can probably work something out -- if you are both willing to be a little flexible (which it sounds like you are). If she is not a reasonable person, then you simply have to decide how long you want to work for someone who is not reasonable.

If your previous requests were not consistent with your employer's expectations, procedures, etc. ... then that gives you the feedback you need to change the way you request time off so that you can be more likely to get it in the future.

Good luck with your meeting.